Justice Society of Japan
by Edrobot
Summary: A chance encounter leads to the formation of Japan's newest super-team. But between between government conspiracies, an evil sorceress, aliens and a time-traveling assassin, do they even stand a chance? A crossover between the DCU and more Anime and Video Games than I can count. But especially Gurren Lagann, Final Fantasy XIII, Xenoblade Chronicles, Madoka Magica, Code Geass.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Dialogue that is meant to be characters speaking english is written [Like this]. Everywhere else, the characters are assumed to be speaking Japanese.**

[FRONTCOVER: A dynamic groupshot, where the main characters are fighting suits of animated armor. The title reads "A Fight at the Museum!", and a caption informs the reader that this issue is "NOT A DREAM! NOT AN IMAGINARY STORY!" Featured most prominently are Simon the Digger, Lightning Farron, and Shulk. Simon is clutching a drill, and ducking under a samurai armor's katana, Lightning is parrying the same blade, and Shulk is slicing a suit of european armor in half. Meanwhile, you can see Shinji Ikari in a dress suit backing away from another suit of armor brandishing an axe, about to strike him while a girl with orange hair tries (and fails) to pull the Axe away]

* * *

"Congratulations, child." said the man "In just a few short weeks, you've robbed me of my fleet, robbed me of my dignity, and robbed me of my daughter's heart. It's only fair that you should rob me of life."

The boy remained silent.

"Come now, what's wrong?" said the man. "I'm the one who took everything from you. Your home, your dreams, your family... you should have every right to wish me dead."

Yet the boy remained silent still.

"What is it that you want, then? A fair trial? Justice? Any judge with a sane mind would give me the death penalty for what I've done, assuming your government doesn't keep me alive to try to steal my secrets. But I could always escape. No, I would always escape, because every time you would refuse to put an end to it. And I would become your shadow, haunting at every turn. For years and years your existence will be such, denying you the chance to put down your sword for fear of losing your loved ones. And then one day you'll slip, and you'll be at my mercy. And then I will ask you a simple question. Why? Why didn't you kill me? Why-"

*SNAP*

Simon the Digger jolted awake to find himself staring into the flower-shaped pupils of Nia Teppelin, his girlfriend and former princess of the Spiral Kingdom.

"Si-mon! Don't tell me you've fallen asleep again!"

"Oh. Sorry, dear." Simon said. "I kinda had trouble sleeping last night."

"Well that is what happens when you stay up all night playing video games."

"Guilty as charged." Simon chuckled softly.

Nia gave Simon a wistful look. "Conscious or not, I'm glad you came anyway." She twirled around, gigging. "I've been wanting to see this exhibit ever since I was a little girl! I can't believe it actually came all the way to Tokyo!"

"Yeah, its... really great." Simon held back a sigh. At the end of the day he wasn't all that interested the Garrett Memorial History Museum, even if there was an exhibit on King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. He figured that King Arthur (assuming he ever existed in the first place) was probably a pretty cool guy, but seeing all those weapons and pictures on display like that was just kind of boring. If given the option, Simon would much rather be doing something exciting, like attending a monster truck rally, fighting a supervillain, skydiving, or fighting a sentient monster truck supervillain while skydiving ("Man, wasn't that a weird day?"Simon thought to himself as he pondered that particular memory). Plus, Simon always worried that a supervillain would try to steal something and that he would end up getting blamed for the collateral damage.

The fact that the only way he could get in was through a formal party for the exhibit's opening didn't help things. Simon never knew exactly what to wear to formal events; as far as he was concerned, a blue jacket over a loose, white shirt was all the clothes a guy needed. So he panicked and pulled out the first thing that caught his eye; a golden tuxedo that he swore Kittan gave to him as a joke. Nia thought it looked fine, of course, but then again she'd probably say the same thing if Simon was wearing a gorilla suit. She's funny like that.

"Are you okay?" said Nia. "You seem a bit... what's the word? 'high-strung'?"

"Ah, it's nothing." Simon lied. "It's just a bit stressed, that's all." That much, at least, was true. Trying to juggle being a superhero and running a repair shop is no easy feat, especially when you don't have superpowers or a secret identity to fall back on.

"I know you work hard, Simon. But life isn't all about patching oil leaks and punching supervillains. You need to take it easy every once in awhile." She gently Took Simon's hand. "You know as well as I do that Kittan and the others can handle the shop just fine..."

"Yeah..."

"...and if a disaster breaks out somewhere, you can leave it to Super Young Team."

Simon's eye twitched momentarily. "Y-yeah." he said. "They'll do just fine." He considered turning his cell phone back on, but ultimately decided against it.

Suddenly, an unfamiliar voice called out. "Nia? Ohmygosh, Is that you?!"

Simon and Nia turned to find a dark-haired young woman with purple eyes in a frilly red dress waving at them.

"Lyra?" said Nia.

"I knew it! It is you!" the other woman said. "I mean who can forget hair like yours? It's even more beautiful than I remember it! Ohmygosh, it's been like, what? Three years?"

Nia's face glowed with a flash of recognition. "LYRA!" she shouted, seizing her into a full-body hug. "I thought I would never see you again!" Tears of joy streamed down the Nia's eyes.

"Ha ha, not so tight, Nia." said Lyra. "Everyone's staring at us. It's probably making your boyfriend jealous."

"Oh, sorry." Nia backed off, and brushed off her dress.

"So... is this someone I should know?" said Simon.

Nia smiled. "Si-mon, this is Lyra, remember? From the book club?"

"Oh, right." vague memories of the two swam to the surface.

"So I'm guessing you're finally done with your tour of Europe?" said Nia.

"But of course!" Lyra smirked. "I had a magical time there, I can't wait to tell you all about it!"

"Well, I don't want to get in the way of this reunion." said Simon, "How about I go get us drinks while you two catch up with each other?"

"Fruit punch for me, if they have it!" said Nia.

"I prefer a champagne, if you please." said Lyra. "And don't worry, I'm not going to steal away your girlfriend or anything."

Simon smiled. "Alright, you two lovebirds have fun. I'll be right back." As he walked away, he thought he could hear Nia say something along the lines of "Why would he be afraid of you kidnapping me?" Followed by a hearty laugh from Lyra.

Simon looked around the room for a bit, until he finally found a young man in a white suit with messy red hair carrying a tray of champagne glasses.

"Nice tux." Said the waiter.

"Ha ha, very funny." Simon replied.

"No, I mean it. It actually looks really nice with your blue hair." He pointed at Simon's unkempt mop with, as far as Simon could tell, absolute sincerity.

"Uh... right." Simon took a glasse, and began to hand the young man a tip, only for him to refuse.

"No thanks, I don't actually work here." The young man said. "I'm just filling in for the guy who does."

"Ah." Simon considered forcing the issue. But as uncouth as he was, Simon was vaguely aware that probing the psyche of random waiters is not something you typically do at these sort of events. So he did his best to ignore his instincts and left to try to find the punch, assuming there was any to begin with.

As he continued to search through the crowd of rich people in formal wear, he noticed that security was a good deal tighter than he expected. Rather than your standard rent-a-cop, the guards stationed around the perimeter of the exhibit hall were much more professional-looking, standing to attention with firearms concealed in such a manner that civilians wouldn't notice them but would be obvious to anyone with any kind of combat experience. Their sunglass-hidden eyes were hawkishly eying the guests as they passed. He approached one of them, a short young lady with fire-engine red hair.

Simon examined the stylized, trident-shaped emblem on the guard's uniform. "Yep, just as I thought." he said to himself. "Black Knights. Someone must be pulling out all the stops today." the guard pulled down her shades to glare at him, prompting Simon to take his leave. "But that doesn't make sense, those guys are supposed to fight supers. What are they doing here?" Simon looked down at the floor as he lost himself in thought. "Are they expecting a villain to show up?" he asked himself. "But if so, why did they go ahead with the party? Or maybe they're not expecting anyone in particular. Maybe they're just here to protect someone impor-"

Simon soon got an answer to his question when he crashed right into a well-dressed gentleman, sending his glass crashing to the floor.

"Oh, sorry about that, mister-" He began to say, when suddenly a pink-haired woman in a black suit shoved a very large pistol right into his face.

"We have a possible 10-31 in progress." she said into her comlink. "Prime Minister is safe for the moment. Squad alpha, pattern delta. Squad beta, charlie, standby for further instructions. Over."

"Wait, did you say the prime-?" Simon began to say.

Ka-click! The woman flipped the safety off her gun.

"Ah-ha... I'll shut up now." the young man gulped.

"Please calm down,Inspector Farron, Simon here is a national hero. Even if he did want to kill me, I'm sure he'd do something more clever than fall flat on his face." Simon looked up to see the Prime Minister extending a hand towards him. He was wearing a big smile, the kind only a politician can keep for any length of time.

"Uh. Thank you, mister Ikari." Simon said, blushing with embarrassment as he picked himself up off the floor.

"Please, call me Gendo." said the Prime Minister. "I believe this is the first time we've met?"

"Yeah... I guess it is." Simon glanced nervously at the woman's gun, which was still pointed at his face. "Say, I don't mean to be rude, but can you ask your bodyguard to-"

"Certainly. Please put the gun down, Inspector."

The bodyguard sighed as she holstered her weapon. "False alarm. Code green." she said into her commlink.

"You'll have to excuse her. She's a bit jumpy, but I assure you she's only worried about the safety of my son and I."

"Yeah, I'll bet." Simon scrambled to figure out how to continue the conversation. "So uh... your son... his name is..."

"Shinji."

"Yeah, Shinji. How's... he doing?"

"He's still not talking to people, if that's what you're asking." Gendo's smile fell. "It appears he still hasn't learned to cope with his mother's death."

His face turned towards the far wall, where a teenage boy was moping in front of a display of medieval tapestries depicting ancient battles, trying his best not to be noticed by anyone.

"Poor kid..." Simon thought to himself. "It's not his fault that his mother couldn't control her powers. And to survive an explosion that leveled a city block..."

"He looks lonely." Simon's mouth said before his brain caught up with him. "Doesn't he ever hang out with kids his own age?"

"After a decade of moping, you'd think so, wouldn't you? But the sad truth is that he just doesn't seem to want to." Gendo shook his head. "I'm not sure if he's being isolated by others who harbor anti-meta resentment, or if he's purposely isolating himself because he's afraid."

"Of what?"

"Of himself, obviously. And what he might become if he ever lost control."

Simon racked his brain in an effort to come up with something positive to say. "...but... but that's ridiculous, right?" he said. "Even if he did inherit the meta... thingy, aren't the odds of ending up with the same power, like, one in a-"

"He's metagene positive. We tested him as right after the incident." Gendo paused to let this sink in. "And given how ingrained the incident was in his psyche, if he does develop powers they're likely to be related, if not identical to his mothers'."

The prime minister's bodyguard pulled him to the side. "Sir," she said. "I believe there's a policy against giving away state secrets to vigilantes..."

"Our private life was not a state secret, last time I checked." Gendo said.

"Yes, but the press-"

"...will figure it out eventually. The superhero community, however, deserves a head start given how their reputation was tarnished during the last incident." Gendo nodded. "Relax, Inspector. You worry about my head, I'll worry about my career."

The Inspector sighed. "If you say so, sir."

"But enough about me." the Prime Minister said. "How are you doing, Simon? I've heard talk that you'd be proposing to your girlfriend soon. Did I hear right?"

Simon froze. "Aaack! Nia!" he said. He then looked at the president's champagne glass. "I'm sorry sir, but I'm in kind of a hurry right now. Say, you haven't drank out of that, have you?"

"Why no, I-"

Simon snatched the Prime Minister's glass right out of his hand. "Sorry sir, gotta run! I promise to vote for you next year!" he shouted as he went off to find Nia.

"...what a curious young man." Gendo said as Simon left.

Inspector Farron could only plant her palm in her face and sigh.

Meanwhile, Simon arrived at where he left Nia only to find that Lyra was nowhere in sight. Instead he found her talking to a pair of teenager men; one blonde and short, the other raven-haired and thin. The first one was wearing a suit and carrying what looked like a large, oddly-shaped guitar case on his back, while the second was wearing a school uniform, which Simon recognized as belonging to Ashford Academy, a private school not far from here.

"[...it's a shame they couldn't find Excalibur.]" The blonde said in what sounded like English tinged with a thick British accent. "[Still, the sheath it was carried in is still quite a rare find.]"

"[Assuming it's the original, of course.]" Said the other teen in what Simon believed was an American accent.

"[Well, some simple tests should clear that up. If we can find anything magical about it, we might be able to prove that it's the real deal.]"

"[And if it's ordinary?]"

"[That wouldn't rule out the possibility of it being genuine. After all, it was the sword that was supposed to be magic, not the sheath. After all we can always compare it to-]"

"Um, [execute-] no, wait, I mean [excuse me a second]." Simon interrupted in what little high-school English he could remember. "I got the drink, Nia. Where'd Lyra go?"

"Oh, Simon!" She said. "Lyra had to go to the ladies room. Did you remember to get the punch?"

Simon looked down at the singular glass he was carrying. "Aw crap, I knew I forgot something..."

"Oh that's okay. I wasn't that thirsty anyway." Nia assured him. "Anyway, I'd like you to meet some new friends Lyra introduced me to!" he gestured to the blonde. "This is Shulk Lowsley, a real-life wizard!"

Shulk laughed. "Oh no, you've got it all wrong; I'm not a Magus, I just work with the Mages Association. Can't actually do any magic, to be honest."

"Oh, I'm sorry about that!" Nia said. "I just assumed-"

"It was an honest mistake." Shulk said. "Believe me, you're not the first to think that. In fact some people have even asked if I graduated from Hogwarts."

"Is that a real place?!" Nia said enthusiastically.

"Um... no. No it isn't." Shulk gave the woman a perplexed look.

"Awwww..." Nia sighed. "Now where was I? Oh yes, and this other young gentleman is Lelouch Lamperouge. He's going to be one of Lyra's students in the upcoming semester."

"Lyra has a teaching job?" Simon asked.

"Of course, silly! She got a job at Ashford! Didn't I tell you? " Nia said. "Oh wait, no I didn't. Hmm." she frowned, looking somewhat disappointed.

Lelouch smirked. "We were just talking about how excited we were to see this exhibit. The vice president of the student council has been looking forward to it for weeks."

"I'm guessing he's big into chivalry?"

"You... could say that." said Lelouch, glancing off to the side. Simon followed his gaze until he found a group of students in Ashford Academy uniforms. One of them, a diminutive, purple-haired boy, appeared to be giving a pep talk of some sort to an orange-haired girl wearing a wide-brimmed sunhat ("Indoors? That's unusual" Simon noted). While a very full-figured student watched with amusement. "Excuse me a moment." Lelouch said before walking off to deal with the teenage crisis was brewing.

"I think I need to get going too, I'm afraid." Shulk said. "I need to have a chat with the curator concerning the tests. So long." And with that, he too departed.

Simon scratched the back of his head with free hand. "Man, I feel like such a killjoy..."

"Aww, don't feel bad, Simon; it's not your fault." Nia said, taking the glass from his hands. "You know I'm always happy when you're around!" she took a sip from her glass, and scrunched up her face as soon as the bitter juices came into contact with her tongue "*cough* *cough* I mean, I guess I don't really like champagne, but I've always wanted to try it!"

"I guess that's one way to look at it."

"See? You're feeling better already!" Nia's eyes glimmered as the string quartet began a new piece. "Oh! Canon in D! I love this one!" She curtsied and extended her hand. "Simon, would you have this dance with me?"

"Um... I'd be delighted to!" he said as Nia escorted him towards the dance floor.

Simon's anxious heart began to pound as the room filled with the sound of Pachelbel. Time seemed to stand still as the two lovebirds began their dance (with Nia in the lead, since she was the only one who knew how). They looked into each other's eyes, and for one moment, they forgot their troubles. They forgot about the Spiral Kingdom, Lordgenome, and Kamina. They forgot about champagne, supervillains, and the Super Young Team.

For one brief, magical moment, the pair forgot all else in the world but each other.

...And then suddenly a huge pillar of flame burst out of the ground at the spot they were about to waltz into.

The hall was thrown into an uproar. Some patrons fled the room screaming their heads off, others began to take photos with their cell phones, and others still stood in place, too paralyzed in fear to do anything.

"[Oh dear.]" said Shulk. He then pulled the case off his back, and began fumbling with the locks while making a hasty apology to the museum curator. "[Sorry about this Miss Robin, but it seems that something's just come up...]" With the last lock removed, the young man pried the case open to reveal a very large, oddly-shaped metallic red sword decorated in bright blue stripes, with a large circular hole near the hilt. While it appeared to be very unbalanced, it was deceptively light, so Shulk had no trouble holding onto it with one hand as he slid his finger along the circular stripe near the hole causing a glowing user interface to appear in the center.

"[That's a strange device you have there.]" said Nico Robin, the museum curator. "[Is it some kind of special magus weapon?]"

"[Well... yes and no.]" Said Shulk. "[The Monado is a mystic code from ages past, and it is designed to be used as a weapon, but I'm actually trying to use it as a scanner...]" The blade chimed as Shulk finally found what he was looking for. "[Brilliant!]" he said as he held the blade up so that he was looking at the flame through the blade's opening. "[Just as I thought, a prana signature!]"

"[A what?]" said the curator.

"[It's a... magic thing.]" said Shulk. "[And it's a strong one too, though nothing apocalyptic. My guess is that we're either dealing with a powerful magus, or a moderately powerful spiritual being of-]"

But Shulk's explanation was cut short as he was wracked by a sharp headache. He clutched his forehead and closed his eyes, dreading what was about to come next. "[Oh no... not now...]"

When he opened them he found himself on a street corner, watching a fight between Nia's husband and an armored figure in a horned helmet. The room was littered with corpses, including several of the Black Knights and a handful of costumed vigilantes that he didn't recognize. He couldn't identify them, however, as he soon found himself in a dreamlike trance, unable to do anything but watch the ensuing battle.

Armed with only his drill-necklace, Simon was trying to hold his ground against the knight, but the Knight effortlessly blocked every single one of his blows, before shoving a brilliant black blade though Simon's stomach. He thought he heard a woman screaming in the background...

…the vision faded and Shulk was back at the Museum, with nary a moment passing in between.

"A spiritual being of what?" the curator asked.

"Uh... well..." Shulk grappled with what he could possibly say to politely end the conversation before deciding to just dart toward the pillar of flame, calling back "Sorry about this, I'll explain later!" as he left.

The Inspector, meanwhile, was busy making emergency calls to the Tokyo Metropolitan Police. "I've already contacted the rest of the Metahuman Crimes Division, and the Black Knights have begun to evacuate the citizens," Inspector Farron said to the Prime Minister. "We should leave. Now."

"What about Shinji?" said Gendo.

"If he hasn't left already, he's probably cowering in a bathroom somewhere." The Inspector took a moment to assess her situation. "Don't worry, I'll get him out of here. You get to safety."

"No." Gendo said, shaking his head. "Stay here and take care of that... thing, I'll try to find the boy."

"I don't mean to be rude, sir, but that's an incredibly-"

"Don't worry about me." he pulled a small pistol out of his jacket. "I can handle myself. Just make sure that thing gets nowhere near Shinji."

"...If you insist."

As for simon and Nia, they just stared at the flames dumbfounded.

"Is it time for you to go to work?" Nia asked.

"Looks like it." Simon pulled a small earpiece out of his pocket and handed it to Nia. "Try to get everyone to safety, then get Kittan to send the Lagann over." He thought about this for a moment. "But just the Lagann this time. I don't think there's enough room for the Gurren as well."

"Right!" Nia nodded appreciatively before giving Simon a peck on the cheek as she left to do just that. "Just try not to get hurt!"

Simon was soon joined by Shulk and the Inspector, the latter of which didn't seem too enthusiastic about the others' presence.

"Let me handle this." she said. "I'm a trained professional who can take down a meta with her bare 're a vigilante who built a robot in his garage and a kid with a plastic sword."

"Well tough. I'm not leaving and you can't make me!" said Simon.

"I can probably have you arrested." the Inspector said.

"I'll take that chance."

"You'd better not!" said Shulk. "If you don't get of here with the others you're all going to die!"

"Is that supposed to be a threat?" asked the Inspector.

"If so, it's not a very good one." said Simon.

"No no, It's not that!" Shulk said in a hurried tone, "I get these... visions, you see. And in one of them I saw you killed by an armored warrior in a horned helmet, just a few moments ago!"

"And you expect us to buy that?" said the Inspector.

"In a world full of talking gorillas and aliens who fly around in their long johns?" said Simon. "Sure; I'll take that risk. If the guy with horns shows up, I'll duck out and head for cover! Simple!"

"Simple minded, maybe..." said the Inspector.

Simon chuckled. "Well if the helmet guy does show up, I can at least count on you to stop him, right Farron?"

"Just call me 'Lightning'." the Inspector said "Rolls off the tongue better."

"...that's not your real name, is it?" asked Simon.

"That's not important." Lightning replied. "What is important is that we figure out what we're up against."

Suddenly, the Monado started beeping wildly. "Heads up, there's a subspace rift forming in the center. Looks like someone's trying to teleport in..."

"Can you stop him?" asked Lightning.

"I don't think so." Shulk experimented with a few of the settings on the Monado. "Even if I jammed the caster's signal, that's no guarantee that he won't try again..."

"Make that 'she won't try again'. Look!" Simon shouted as the flaming pillar began to unravel, revealing a masked sorceress clad in shapely golden armor and a bearskin cape hovering in the air with nothing but the withered, white-grey threads of her long, braided hair betraying her true age.

"Something tells me you're not Merlin." said Simon.

"Correct." said the sorceress in a raspy, bone-dry tone. "I am Morgaine Le Fey. I don't suppose any of you have heard of me?"

"I dunno. Should I have?" said Simon.

"She's one of King Arthur's mortal enemies!" said Shulk. "And possibly his half-sister, the mythology is a bit fuzzy on that point..."

"I see my reputation precedes me." said Morgaine. She eyed eyeing the weapons that Shulk and Lightning were carrying, and said "I see you planned on using force. How very..." she paused to come up with the right words. "...human." She shook her head with disapproval. "I don't suppose you'd be willing to just hand over Avalon if I promised not to hurt anyone?"

"Which Avalon are we talking about here?", replied Shulk, "Last time I checked we didn't have any mystical islands here in this museum."

"No, no, not that one. I meant the sheath that Excalibur once rested in." she pointed to a large display case in the back. "You three are rather uninformed for sellswords..."

"We're not mercenaries..." said Lightning.

"Yeah." said Simon. "Light over here is an officer of the law, and the rest of us are what you'd call "concerned citizens"."

"Fascinating." said Morgaine. "To think that humans in this day in age are so eager to throw their lives away." She raised her hand, and a circle of flame surrounded the group. "My offer still stands. Your safety for Avalon. The choice is yours."

"Not a chance, lady!" said Simon. "You'd probably just use it to blow up the moon or turn everyone into frogs or something!"

"So be it." Morgain flew higher still into the air, and began to recite an incantation as a green fireball began to form between her hands.

"**Gehénnam, adolebit omn-**"

Without warning, Lightning leapt dozens of feet into the air, past wall of flames that surrounded her, and towards Morgaine. Mid-flight, she flipped a switch on her gun, and with a quick flick of the wrist the pistol unfolded into an ornate sword with a curved edge, which she swung at the sorceress as she passed by. Though Morgaine was able to dodge it made her lose focus, causing her spells to fizzle out, releasing the others from their fiery prisons and sending her crashing to the ground.

Once they landed, Lightning then switched back to her weapon's gun form, and fired off a few rounds at the sorceress, followed by conjuring up a couple of glowing, white spheres, which flew towards Morgane at blinding speed. The bullets bounced off a shield that Morgaine hastily threw up, but the energy spheres exploded as they collided with the barrier, sending Morgaine back even further.

"Okay that was awesome." Simon said.

"Im...possible." Morgaine coughed. "A L'cie?! I thought the Fal'cie were extinct!"

"A Fal' what?" said Simon.

"Long story, not important." replied Lightning. "For now, just pretend that it means 'wizard' because it would make just as much sense. And keep your mind on the battle."

"Okay." he turned to Shulk. "Say, this wasn't the horned guy you were talking about, is it?"

"Well, I don't think so, but-"

"Right, then!" Simon grabbed a chair and smashed a display stand full of antique weapons, grabbed a morningstar, and started rushing towards Morgaine with the weapon held high. "Now it's my turn!"

But just when he was a few feet away, he ran face-first into an invisible barrier that Morgaine set up. "Foolish mortal, did you really think that I would go down that easily? The L'cie did surprise me, I must admit, but I will be taken by surprise no long-"

Ignoring Morgaine's rant, Simon tore off off drill-shaped necklace, and shoved it into the barrier, gritting his teeth as he did so. A continuous shockwave of green energy began to form around Simon, and much to Morgaine's shock she felt her barrier about to give way. She flew back up into the air just as Simon was about to fully pierce it, leading to Simon accidently punching a large hole in the wall, revealing a stall in the men's restroom on the other side.

This was extremely frightening to the brown-haired kid hiding the restroom stall, who let out a short scream of terror.

"Oh fu-" said Simon, realizing what he had done. "Uh, sorry! That was an accident! It won't happen again!" he tried hiding the Morningstar behind his back.

The kid, not reassured in the slightest, backed into the stall door.

"Okay, gotta think quick. How would bro handle this?" Simon took a deep breath. "What's your name, kid?"

"...S-Shinji." said the boy. "S-Shinji Ikari."

"Well Shinji what I mean to say is that I'm a superhero. You want to help me take down a supervillain?"

"Uh..." Shinji seemed to be confused.

"Of course you do. And the best thing you can do right now is go home and try not to get taken hostage. You do have a home to go back to, right?"

"Yeah... it's just that-"

"I know it's looks dangerous out there, but don't worry; we promise to protect you no matter what. You just need to be brave enough to try." He knelt down to Shinji and point and his heart. "Don't belive in yourself..." Then Simon pointed at his own Heart. "...believe in the me that believes in you!"

"Uh..." Shinji slowly raised his own arm, and pointed at something behind Simon.

Dreading what he was about to see, Simon turned his head to find Morgaine Le Fey readying another fireball.

"Uh oh."

"**Gehénnam, adolebit Omnia!**"

Getting in front of Shinji, Simon crossed his arms in hopes that he could shield the boy from the intense heat that was about to hit, only to find that it never came. He slowly lowered his arms to find himself facing a barrier of glowing concentric octagons. Glancing behind him, Simon found Shinji, cowering on the floor with a single arm weakly stretched out towards the shield.

"Did you do that?" Simon asked.

"I-I don't know." Shinji whimpered.

The gears in Simon's brain began to turn. "Do you think you could do it again?" A second fireball crashed against the shield.

Shinji looked down at his hands. They were twitching ever so slightly. "...Maybe?"

"Allright..." Simon glowed with confidence as he picked Shinji up from the floor. "Now listen close, I think I know how we can win this..."

* * *

"Nia? NIA!" Lyra pushed her way through the crowd towards the blue haired woman chatting on her cell phone.

"...That's right, we need it as soon as possible... no the Gurren won't fit... yes, I'll clear some space... okay, good by!" Nia closed her phone and turned to Lyra. "Sorry about that, just needed to take a call. Thank goodness you made it out!"

"But what's going on in there?!"

"Oh, nothing to worry about, just an evil sorceress of some sort. It happens!" Nia said with a beaming smile on her face.

"...that's not exactly something to be happy about."

"I know. But Simon's in there, so everything's going to be just fine!"

Lyra didn't exactly share Nia's confidence. "Yeah... does your boyfriend have any superpowers?"

"No."

"Does he have any magic?"

"No."

"Does he have any weapons? A mystic sword? A shotgun? A powersuit, perhaps?"

"Well he has a robot, but we're still waiting for it..." Nia's face suddenly lit up. "Oh, that reminds me! We need to make room for the landing!" The young woman awkwardly tried to climb up a telephone pole, and began shouting. "Everyone! Get out of the way! We need to make room for a giant robot! It's going to land right here and I don't want to see any of you hurt!"

Unfortunately, Nia's pleas were unsuccessful. In fact if anything they more people were showing up to watch the crazy lady scream about god know what.

Lyra began hanging her head in embarrassment. "I think we need a plan B..."

* * *

Meanwhile, a middle-aged american with messy blonde hair that never seemed to stay down was on his way back to his hotel, when he stopped to watch the spectacle with equal parts confusion and curiosity.

"[I guess you get the crazy types here, too.]" he thought. "[And here I thought Metropolis was the only place fulla weirdos...]"

Just then, he noticed a pair of voices conversing in perfect English passing by. They were making their way through the crowd, towards the museum that everyone else seemed to be so worried about, and since the man could barely understand anything else that was being said he found himself becoming an accidental eavesdropper.

"[I'm sorry, I can't do this. I don't think I'm ready...]"

"[Don't worry so much. There's just one guy and apparently there's at least three other supers backing you up. Just make sure you get into the front lines and get a few good blows in, and the story of the scrappy young upstart will practically write itself. Besides, if you break we'll just get Nia to fix you up.]"

The man tried to get a glimpse of the speakers, but he didn't catch anything more than a sunhat and a few locks of long, orange hair.

"[But the costume, it's so...]"

"[The costume is fine, everyone else is wearing stuff like that nowadays. I mean Wonder Woman's a paragon of virtue, and do you see how she dresses? Besides, everyone else in Super Young Team has a costume inspired by famous hero.]"

"[But you based mine on 'Power Girl'? Really?]"

"[Well, admittedly you don't quite have the rack to pull off the boob window...]"

"Hey...!]"

"...but other than that you've got a good figure and you're pretty strong so you do fit the mold. And the only way you'll get their attention is if you become a sensation, so why not show off those legs of yours?]"

At this point the conversation was too far away to hear, and he didn't particularly feel like following them.

"[Kids these days...]" he sighed.

* * *

"**Mortis Arma reptilia!**"

A quivering mass of thorns and brambles clashed against Shinji's shield as Lightning leapt behind it, carrying Shulk into the hallway with Simon.

"Alright, you're doing good so far, kid!" Simon said. "Keep that up for a few more minutes and we'll be golden!"

"I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away, I mustn't run away." Shinji's knees quivered as he tried to focus on using his newly-acquired powers.

"This was a bad idea." Said Lightning.

"It's not like we had too many options, none of us are much in the way of defence." He turned to Simon. "What do we do next?"

"Okay, here's the plan." Simon pulled out a crumpled up map of the museum. "Light and Shinji stay here and guard this entrance and keep her distracted, while you and I circle around. Then we wheel over the catapult on the east wall, and use it to I launch you into the air so you can hit her with that big sword thingy of yours."

"Just one problem." said Shulk. "The Monado doesn't work on humans, and while it's durable, it's a lot lighter than it looks. You'd be better off swinging a wiffle bat for all the good it'll do."

"Okay then... in that case you fire the catapult and I'll just clobber her in the face."

"Are you joking?" said Lightning. "We're fighting a centuries old witch and the best plan you can come up with is 'punch her in the face'?"

"Do you have a better plan?" said Simon.

"Yes. Hold our position and wait for backup."

"That could take ages!" Simon protested. "She could have enacted her plan! Or worse, Super Young Team could show up!"

Lightning's eye twitched ever so slightly. "You may have a point there." she said. "Still, let's try something a bit less reckless." she pointed at a diagram of the second floor. "There's a balcony here that overlooks the main hall. If you two circle around and keep her distracted, I might just be able to get a good shot in..."

"Um, you said something about a distraction?" Shulk point past Shinji's barrier, towards the the opposite doorway. The young, red-haired waiter from before rushed into the room carrying a metal pipe, and smashed a display case containing a medieval crossbow, swiping a handful of bolts that were also on display as he did so. Morgaine watched with mild amusement as he loaded, drew, and fired the bow, missing by a mile.

"So, yet another mortal has come to play hero?" With a wave of her hand, the young man flew through the air, and crashed through an archery display, dropping his crossbow as he landed. A soft snap could be heard as his tendons ruptured.

"Give up, child. I tire of this already."

The boy, however, would not heed Morgaine's words. "Never!" he said. Weakly, he grabbed a bow, and mumbled "Trace... on!". Seconds later, a large broadsword materialized in his hand, and he began to fumble with a nearby longbow, apparently trying to launch the sword as if it were an arrow, with little success.

Morgaine stared at the boy with disbelief, and then aimed one of her arms at him."If you truly wish to die a hero's death, then I will gladly comply..."

"Okay, new plan." said Lightning. "I'll save the boy, you two head for the balcony."

"And then what?" said Shulk.

"Improvise." she tapped Shinji on his shoulder to get his attention, and then sped off once the shield was down, leaving the three young men on their own.

"...well? You heard the lady!" Simon said. "Let's get to that balcony!"

* * *

"People, I beg you!" Nia shouted. "The only way my boyfriend can beat the evil sorceress is if you all make room for the giant robot! …Yes, I am a space alien. ...No, I'm not crazy, why do you ask?"

Having spent the last few minutes trying desperately not to be seen, Lyra was finally fed up. She stormed her way in front of Nia. "Stand back. Let me handle this..." She reached into her purse and pulled out a tiny perfume bottle labeled "Symphonie de Menthe Poivrée". "You might want to hold your breath for this..."

After giving Nia a moment to react, Lyra point the bottle upwards gave the bulb a light squeeze, spraying a fine purple mist into the air. Soon, everyone's nostrils filled with an intoxicating aroma that could be politely described as a pungent medley of peppermint and horseradish. Soon, the crowd began to emit a calamitous caconophy of coughing, and quickly began to part in an effort to escape the stench.

Even Nia, who was more than willing to go with whatever crazy plan her friend came up with, was having a hard time maintaining her composure.

"*cough* *cough*... what was that?" she asked.

"Just some *cough* perfume I bought while *cough* I was in France." Lyra replied. "I asked a perfume maker for *cough* the strongest *cough* thing he had. *cough* be careful what you wish for, am I right?"

"Yeah, you're always doing things like that." Nia made a stifled laugh as she waited for a passing breeze to reduce the odor to a more tolerable level. "Okay..." she said once she was able to breath again. "...Now to rescue Simon!"

* * *

Meanwhile, in a less reputable part of the city, there stands a very unusual building. Supposedly it used to be an aircraft hangar built by a wealthy enthusiast prior to World War II that nobody had bothered to tear down, though the place had been patched up and reworked so many times that only the hollow interior and overly large doorways gave any hint as to it's original purpose. Too small compared to the surrounding buildings, too large for any practical use, and too old to demolish outright, the hangar remained a local curiosity; trading hands many, many times over the decades. Up until recently, it had been a local landlord seeking to make a quick buck bought up the place and converted it into "Chieftain Motors", an auto-repair center of ill repute.

But a few years ago the place traded hands again, this time passing into the possession of Simon Doriru, a former street urchin who had worked at Chieftain Motors before achieving national recognition when he thwarted an alien invasion using a robot that he and his late brother salvaged from a junkyard. The place was re-named "Kamina Motors" in honor of said brother, a fact the huge, red, skull-shaped sign hung over the building was all too proud to announce.

Inside, another young man was working on a much smaller mech than he was used to. He wore a thick tuft of blond hair on his head, shaped as if a spike was jutting forward, while everything below the forehead was cut short almost like male-pattern baldness were happening in reverse. His bushy brown eyebrows were furrowed as he tightened the screws on a diminutive, humanoid robot skeleton. It was apparently a kind of toy robot that fought other toy robots or something using interchangeable weapons. Kittan wasn't sure and he didn't really care; working on a childrens' toy was embarrassing, and he wanted to get done with it as soon as possible.

Not helping things was the robot's owner; a ten-year-old tomboy with a raspy voice who bossed around a couple kids her own age, one of them fat and dopey looking, the other skinny and kinda jitterish. They of course had their own robots, because their parents were also okay with them owning three-foot-tall killer robots (Kittan did note that the robots weapons were weak enough that they only posed a danger to other toy robots, but he was too worn out to give a fuck at this point).

"Hey! What's takin' ya so long?" the tomboy tapped her foot impatiently. "I ain't payin by the hour, so hurry up and fix Peppercat already! I don't have all day!"

"Yeah, well, maybe if ya just keep yer trap shut I'd be done by now!" Kittan gritted his teeth. He had tried to be patient with the kid, but after an hour of nagging looking over his shoulder Kittan was at wits end. "Stupid Simon and his stupid 'we fix anything' policy... kid's more annoying than my sisters..."

Suddenly, Kittan's pocket began vibrating, and the sickeningly sweet theme song of that pony show that his sisters watch began to play. Kittan then realized just why everyone was so ready to accept choosing his ringtone as collateral in last night's poker game, as the tomboy began to snicker.

Flush with embarrassment, Kittan deftly pulled out his phone and slammed his finger on the "answer" button in one swift motion. "Hello?"

"Kittan? It's Nia." said the voice on the other end. "You're not busy are you?"

"Eeehhh... of course not!" Kitan gave the impatient tomboy waiting nearby a smug look. "I'm just, ya know, doin' stuff. Whazzup?"

"Simon's in a bit of a jam right now; I need you guys to send the Lagann over so that he can stop Morgane Le Fey, an immortal sorceress straight out of medieval legend from achieving her vague but no doubt malevolent goals."

"Sure! Anything for you, sweet cheeks! Hold on a sec." He reached for a megaphone lying on a nearby workbench. "Allright; hold up, gang!" Kittan said through the megaphone, his booming voice echoing throughout the room. "The boss needs Lagann to fight some kinda kooky magic thing! Prep the canon, on the double!"

"YOU GOT IT, BOSS!" shouted a pair of burly, square-jawed men wearing sunglasses. Their names were Jougan and Balinbow, though Kittan could never remember which was which. They lept off the Mech they were working on and dashed towards a pair of hand-cranks sticking out of the back wall. With all the Machismo they could muster, the twins began twisting the cranks, and a large, red-and-blue cannon began to rise up from the ground, while the roof of the building began to split apart, revealing the bright, blue sky overhead.

"Hey, what's the big idea? Get back to workin on my bot!" said the tomboy.

"Hey, relax, this will just take a sec." Kittan said. "And if you promise to stop complainin', I might just let ya ride with me."

"Ride? Ride what?" said the girl.

* * *

"Uhh, boss?" said the skinny kid, "I don't think this is such a good idea. It's dark and cramped and I wanna go home. Can I please get out?"

"No way! This is gonna be awesome!" said the Tomboy. "'sides; these guys are professionals. They've probably done it a zillion times already."

"Ya got that right, kid." Kittan said as he finished strapping the parachute to the Lagann's frame. "Now let me show you how real badasses make a delivery." He turned towards the shaft of light at the other end of the cannon. "Hey Leeron! You all set there?"

Just outside of the canon, an effeminate, blue-haired man crunched some numbers on his laptop. "Adjusting for additional weight, aaaand..." the computer made a soothing chime. "Looks like you're ready to go, sweetie!"

"Right!" Kittan shoved a pair of noise-cancelling headphones over his ears. "Headphones, **ON!"**

"**On!"** the kids said (some more reluctantly than others) as they followed Kittan's example.

"Music, **ON!"** Kittan shouted.

"**ON!**" Balinbow and Jougan (or was it Jougan and Balinbow?) shouted as they turned on a pair of heavily-worn radios, whereupon the speakers started blasting the sound of Freddie Mercury singing the chorus of "Don't Stop Me Now".

"Canon, **FIRE!"** Kittan pointed dramatically down the length of the cannon, while the tomboy's cohorts ducked for cover."

"**FIIIIIIRRRRRE!"** A scrawny man standing directly behind the canon slammed his fist into the large, red button that was sitting right in front of him with an almost childlike glee.

Back in the canon, the world exploded as the Lagann and it's passengers were shot into the air, high above the Tokyo skyline. The entire city was stretched before them, from the Tokyo Tower to all the way across the Tokyo Bay.

The tomboy looked upon the scene with awe, recording the whole thing on her smartphone so that she could brag about it later. "Man, won't Tenryou be jealous." she said. "Am I right?"

The cohorts were less enthusiastic, with the fat one sweating nervously as he tried to keep his cool, while the skinny one took one look at the city below and ducked back into the cockpit.

"Sweet view, am I right?" said Kitan, who was slightly embarrassed to realize the lengths he was going just to impress a bunch of kids, and how much more successful his love life would be if he put half that effort into impressing a potential lady-friend. "Now here comes the fun part." He grabbed the ripcord on the parachute as the forces of gravity began to catch up with the Lagann. "I gotta pull this here thing at the exact right time; too early and we miss our target, too late and we end up in full body casts!" He took a deep breath as he watched for his stopwatch to reach the exact right moment. "One... two... THREE-"

* * *

Through her binoculars, Lyra stared at the mecha careening through the sky in disbelief. "You've gotta be kidding me... and you say you guys shoot your robot out of a canon?"

"Yep!" said Nia.

"...that seems impractical. And dangerous."

"Oh don't worry, it's perfectly safe!"

Lyra continued to watch as the Lagann's parachute got caught on a fast-food restaurant sign, nearly causing the contents of the mech to spill over onto the street. "I can see that."

One emergency trip to the hardware store later, the girls managed to get the Kitan and the kids who were inexplicably traveling with him down from the Lagann via a ladder.

"That. Was. AWESOME!" said the Tomboy of the group. "You're a heck of a lot cooler than that floozy mechanic that Tenryo hangs out with!"

"Thanks, kid!" said Kitan, quietly ignoring how he had no idea who that was.

"I gotta show this to Peppercat! Oh man, I'm totally coming back to you guys! Hey, do 'ya can do some mechanic stuff and let Peppercat transform into a hoverboard?"

"Uh... maybe?" Kitan grinned nervously. "Maybe I could talk to Leeron about that... it would be kinda expensive though."

"How much!?"

"I dunno, maybe like, thirty thousand yen or-"

"DEAL!" The tomboy then grabbed her cohorts (who were still stunned by the whole ordeal) and started dragging them away. "Come on! That money's not gonna earn itself! Now start looking for plastic bottles, that might be worth a bit of scratch..."

"...are those kids are going to be alright?" said Nia.

"Oh yeah, they'll be just fine!" said Kitan, not completely sure of himself. "Besides, they left that little toy of theirs back at the shop. If they don't come back to pick it up, I'll just call the police or something."

"Well... I suppose you're right." said Nia. "...Just promise me they won't get hurt."

"What, do you want me to follow 'em?" Kittan scratched his head.

"...maybe?" said Nia.

Lyra shot Nia an incredulous look. "Oh yes, a grown man following around a bunch of prepubescent children. That won't be mistaken for anything..." Lyra shook her head. "Don't you have a boyfriend to save?"

"Oh, right!" Nia reached into her purse and took out a small, golden drill-shape necklace, and started climbing up to the Lagann's cockpit.

"Hey, waitasecond." Kitan said. "Isn't that Simon's necklace doohicky?"

"It's her father's." said Lyra.

Kitann looked at her, dumbfounded.

"You know, Lordgenome? The Spiral King? Guy who nearly leveled Tokyo about a decade ago? Honestly, I wasn't even there; how the hell do I know more about this than you?"

"Uhhhh..." Kittan glanced down at his watch. "Oh look at the time I really gotta get back to the garage!" he pointed at Lyra and gave what he imagined was a smarmy wink. He said "Call me sometime, we'll do lunch." before dashing off to catch the subway.

Lyra rolled her eyes. "Moron." she whispered to nobody in particular.

* * *

Sparks flew as steel met steel in the exhibit hall. Morgaine Le Fey had proved to be more nimble than Lightning had expected, and now the pair were locked in an epic sword duel as the red-haired young man just watched helplessly from the other side of the room, too weak to even pick himself up off the ground.

"Funny. I never really imagined you as a swordsman." Lightning said to her opponent as she parried a series of ferocious attacks. "I always thought you were more into treachery and dirty tricks."

"Don't believe everything you read." Morgaine continued her relentless assault, slowly backing Lightning towards a display featuring several suits of armor in a thick glass case. "The centuries it took me to master the art of the blade were nothing to me." She then relented long enough for Lightning to leap backwards onto armor display in an attempt to gain higher ground.

"Just as expected..." the sorceress thought to herself. She then stretched her hand towards the display, and said **"Arma, venit ad vitam!"**

Immediately, the arms of the suit right below Lightning shot up through the glass and grabbed her by the ankles. Before Lightning could react, she found herself being flung across the room, and crashing into a priceless tapestry depicting a humbled Sir Gawain offering his head to the Green Knight. She heard something a crack as her skull collided with the concrete wall behind the tapestry, which subsequently fell from its mount and buried her in a pile of princeless, centuries-old yarn. A quick check of her possessions confirmed that despite her massive headache only thing that was actually broken was her communication device. "Damn it. I'm getting too careless; a blow like that should have killed me..."

As she struggled to get back onto her knees, Lightning's mind ran through all of the possible moves her opponent could make next. She concluded that whatever Morgain did next, it probably wasn't a good idea to stay in one place for very long. So Lightning cut a hole in the tapestry in order to free herself, just in time to see the heavy iron mace that was about to crash through her skull. With her free hand, Lightning grabbed the hit of the mace, halting it mid-swing.

Taking a good look at her attacker, Lightning wasn't surprised to find that the figure that was now struggling to free it's weapon from Lightning's grip was the same suit of animated armor that had originally caught her off guard. She was even less surprised to discover that the suit had been joined by at least a dozen of it's ilk, all brandishing swords, axes bows, and polearms of various make.

Lightning looked up and glared at Morgaine, who was now floating above the assembled legion. "Cute." Lightning said. "So you're going to try to win by numbers, now?"

"Well I never promised a fair fight." Lightning thought she could see her golden mask crack a smile. "It's always enjoyable to toy with a mortals, and truthfully this is the most fun I've had in ages..."

Lightning didn't even bother coming up with a snappy one-liner. Instead, the pink-haired officer threw herself at her opponents, sword in one hand and a spell readied in the other.

* * *

"Remind me not to get on her bad side..." From the balcony, Simon watched as Lightning turned into a hurricane of steel and magic. Her sword cut through the antique armors like they were butter, while the ones who somehow managed to avoid the blade were enveloped in a series of bright white explosions before disappearing entirely. Soon, all that was left in the ruins of the museum were Lightning, Morgaine, and the young man in the corner who still lacked common sense to leave.

"...what was the plan again?" said Shinji.

"I'll tell you in a moment..." Shulk look at the battle below, then at Shinji, then at Simon. "Now would be a very good time for a vision..." he silently bemoaned. A then took a deep breath, and exclaimed "We're going to make a bridge, and then Simon is going to punch her in the face."

Simon cracked his knuckles. "I like this plan."

"A bridge? But out of what?" Shinji asked.

"I was just getting to that." Shulk replied smoothly. "You're going to create a barrier that Simon can walk across. Then, right when Lightning is about to strike Morgaine, Simon is going to leap off the end and strike her with that drill of his. If we time things just right, the bulk her shield's energy will be diverted to stopping Lightning's attack, letting Simon pierce through the other side."

"B-but I've never done this before! How do you know I can hold it for that long! What if he misses! What if he-"

"Shinji, relax." Simon put his hand on Shinji's shoulder. "We both know you can do it. It's like I said; we both believe in you. Now you've got to believe in us."

Shinji felt his eyes drawn to Simon's. He looked at them, and felt a sense of absolute trust flowing through him. "All right... I'll try."

"That's what I like to hear!" Simon slapped Shinji on the back. "I just know you'll make a superhero someday!"

Shinji felt breathless. "A... super-"

"Actually, Shinji brings up a good point." Shulk toyed with the Monado as he interrupted the two. "Landing the blow will require split-second timing, but fortunately I have just the thing for that!" A glowing symbol appeared on his weapon's interface, as it began to radiate a brilliant blue aura. "One of the Monado's more useful functions is that it has a connection to the Speed Force. And more importantly, a connection that can be shared with others."

"Speed force?" Simon crossed his arms "What's that?"

"The Speed Force is a semi-mystical extradimensional energy source which is capable of accelerating matter to superluminal speeds without-" Shulk then remembered that he was talking to a teenage boy and a man who expected a shorter answer. "What I mean to say is that It's a magic... thing... that makes you go really fast."

"Oh. That makes sense." said Simon. "Anything I need to know before you juice me up? Like, don't cross the streams or something?"

"Just keep in mind that the Monado can only tap into the Speed Force for ten seconds at a time. Though at the speeds you're going, it'll feel more like ten minutes." Shulk glanced down at the battle. Lightning had finished off the suits of armor, and was now back in close quarters combat with Morgaine, though as Shulk expected Lightning was having a bit of trouble with Morgaine's shield. "Now's our chance! Shinji, ready the platform!"

"Right!" Shinji trembled as he focused on the space in front of him.

"Simon, you ready for this?"

Simon removed his necklace. "Ready as I'll ever be!"

"On three:" Shulk held the Monado up high. "One! Two! Thrrrrreeeeeeeeeee..."

Shulk's final syllable slowed to a crawl as the Speed Force rushed though Simon's body. He glanced at his watched and found that it too had slowed down; the second hand appeared to be stuck at five seconds to the minute. Examining his surroundings, Simon saw that things looked more or less the same except that everything was frozen in place, and the world had a deep, bluish tint. He was startled by a thunderous noise coming from behind him, and discovered that a bridge of transparent light was forming behind him, past the balcony and over the warriors locked in a majestic dance below.

He looked at Shinji, still frozen in place. "Huh." he said, not expecting to be heard by anyone. "Looks like you pulled it off..." Simon casually began crossing the bridge of light, untill he was finally standing right over where Morgane and Lightning were fighting. He glanced down at his digital watch, was surprised to find that the digits on his watch had also frozen in time. Simon began to wonder if he wasn't somehow violating the laws of physics, but then he remembered that this was happening because of a wizard's magic sword left it at that.

Just then, Simon's train of thought was interrupted by a crack of thunder, as Lightning's sword collided with Morgaine's barrier for the upteenth time. A small tear opened on the other side of the shield, which continued to grow as the shield's energies contracted to a single point. Simon almost wished he could watch the spectacle a few more times, but he knew there were more important things to worry about, as the shield's tear soon began to retract. Clutching his drill tightly, Simon let loose a fearsome battle cry as he lept off the edge of the bridge.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Simon Watched as Morgaine began to walk towards the berserking mecha pilot and began to recite a quick emergency incantation, but for Simon it looked like she was still going in slow motion. And just before the barrier could fully close, Simon's fist managed to slip through the barrier and strike Morgaine's armor-clad face with the full power of his spiral energy-infused punch that dented her mask and sent her flying across the room, where she crashed into a catapult display with enough force to reduce it into a pile of splinters.

"...you know, I could have handled that myself." said Lightning.

Simon was about to say something snarky to the contrary, but thought better of it. "Yeah, but this was better."

"You just destroyed millions in priceless artifacts. How is that 'better'?"

"Well I..." a bead of sweat dripped down Simon's face as he struggled to come up an answer. "...just thought the sooner she's taken out, the less likely civilians get caught in the crossfire."

"True." Lightning grudgingly agreed, "But do you really think a five hundred year old sorceress is going to go down with one lucky punch?"

"...maybe?" said Simon.

"Well unfortunately, you'd be quite wrong about that." the pair turned to find Morgaine standing among the ruins of the catapult, brushing the splinters off her robes. "Just as I was wrong about going easy on you." She touched the dent in her armor's face-mask left behind by Simon's devastating punch. "Despite your lack of discipline, you are clearly formidable advisories, and therefore deserve to be treated as such."

"Uh... thanks?" said Simon.

The air hung still as Morgaine clasped her hands together. Lightning felt her stomach churn as a sickly green aura began to surrounded Morgaine. **"Voco, Modredum!"** she said. **"Disperdes inimicos meos!" **With those words, her aura abruptly changed from green to red, and a vortex of crimson Lightning began to form in front of her, drowning the room in a cacophonous din.

It was so loud, in fact, that the noise reached all the way to the balcony, where Shulk and Shinji were still watching.

"WHAT'S SHE SAYING?!" shinji screamed over the thunder.

"I DON'T KNOW! SOMETHING ABOUT MORDRED... CALLING... I THINK IT'S A SUMMONING SPELL! SHE'S TRYING TO SUMMON MORDRED!"

"WHO'S MORDRED?!"

"THE GUY WHO KILLED KING ARTHUR. NOT THE SORT OF PERSON YOU SHOULD MESS AROUND WITH."

"WHAT?!" Simon shouted from back on the ground floor.

"I SAID HE'S NOT THE KIND OF GUY YOU MESS AROUND WITH!"

"WHO?!"

"MORDRED!"

"WHAT?!"

"I SAID MORDRED!"

"WHAT?!"

"HE SAID MORDRED!" said Lightning.

"WHO'S MORDRED?!" said Simon.

"THE GUY WHO KILLED KING ARTHUR!" said Lightning.

"THE KING ARTHUR?!"

"YEAH!"

"REALLY?!"

"YEAH!"

"THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE THE KIND OF GUY YOU MESS AROUND WITH!"

"I LITERALLY JUST SAID THAT!" said Shulk.

"WHAT?" said Simon.

But before this circuitous argument could go any further, the vortex dissipated, taking the noise with it. In it's place stood a stout figure in glistening silver armor over a blood-red brigandine. On his head, the warrior wore a decorated silver helmet with steel horns, a faceplate that bore no features but a pair of curved slits carved in the front in place of eyes. Finally, in his hand the warrior carried an enormous broadsword with a blue hilt and gold trimmings, which he brandished without the slightest sign of discomfort.

The room went silent.

Slowly, the figure turned to face Morgaine. He then knelt in front of her before speaking. ["Mother, what service dost thou require?"]

Morgaine motioned towards Simon and Lightning, "[Two insolent fools have attempted to take my life, while two of their allies are waiting above. Destroy them for me, Mordred, so that I may accomplish my task.]"

"[Thy will shall be done, mother.]" Mordred bowed his head "[I swear upon my honor, that these fools shall trouble thee no long-]"

Mordred felt his armor shake as he heard a loud "clang" of metal behind him, followed by a loud *FWOOSH* accompanied by what appeared to be green flames engulfing his helmet. He turned his neck to find Simon standing right behind him, baffled as to how Mordred could take a spiral-energy punch without even flinching. Slowly, the warrior got up, and turned to face Simon.

"Have you no honor, knave?" Mordred said in surprisingly good Japanese. "Have things truly fallen so far in this day in age that thy people have been reduced to cheap shots and sneak attacks as your primary modus operandi?"

Simon quickly regained his composure. "Hey, all I know at this point is that you're working for a bad guy, and you want to kill us." Simon threw another spiral-energy punch at Mordred, only to nearly break his knuckles on Mordred's immobile faceplace. "Honor has nothing to do with this!"

Simon tried to throw another punch, but Mordred caught the blow with his free hand before Simon could even blink.

"In that case, I shall take great pleasure in exterminating such a tactless cur..." Mordred's grip soon tightened, causing Simon to grimace in pain at the sound of his fingerbones snapping. He then let go of Simon, but not before slapping him in the face with the force of a truck, sending the young man spiraling to the floor in agony.

"Consider it a blessing that your death shall be quick." Mordred's boot smashed into Simon's chest, shattering his ribs in at least a dozen places, followed by a swift kick to the head. Mordred then clasped his blade in both hands, and raised it above the broken in the manner of an executioner. "It would be against my code to give you anything less..."

Lightning, meanwhile, was furiously trying to load her weapon with an anti-magic bullet. "Think; you've been in worse situations before..." she looked down at her gun. "If that thing is a traditional summon or a low-powered construct, an anti-magic bullet might help. But if it doesn't, he'll go after me next and we'll both be out of commission." she looked back up as Simon. "Either way, we're in over our heads. No choice but to regroup. Now if I could just get to Simon..."

Just as Lightning considered making a mad dash to save Simon, personal safety be damned, a voice echoed throughout the hall.

"NOT SO FAST, EVILDOERS!"

The entire room turned their attention to a teenage girl on the second floor, standing directly across from Shulk and Shinji. She had green eyes and long, tangerine-colored hair that went all the way down to her hips, and wore a transparent pink visor as well as a pair of "robot ears"; translucent pink antenne that seemed to serve no purpose but to move in response to her emotional state. But as unexpected as her appearance was, more perplexing still was her outfit, which looked like it was assembled from the contents of an upscale cosplay bargain bin. On her torso was a "Power Girl" outfit, complete with her infamous "Boob window", but minus the sleeves and gloves. Instead, she wore golden pauldrons and metal gauntlets, the rightmost of which had an attachment that looked like a gold lion with a green gem inserted into the slot. The lower part of her body wasn't much better; while there were similarly-shaped leg-plates, there was also an inexplicable miniskirt for some reason. Overall, it was a very embarrassing costume, and the worst part was that the girl wearing it seemed to know this, as she flinched once everyone started watching her.

"Uh.. Don't worry citizens!" the girl said. "I, "The Amazingly Powerful Girlborg" will make sure that none of you come to harm!"

The room continued to stare at her in silence.

If anyone other than Lightning had super-hearing, they might have heard the girl whisper "Um, okay. I did the speech just like you said. Now what?"

And if perhaps they were concentrating very, very hard, they might have heard a voice in the girl's earpiece reply. "[How did they react?]"

"[I... don't know. They're just... staring at me for some reason.]"

"[They must have been awed by your masterful delivery.]"

"[Milly, I'm serious! And there's another supervillain! I thought you said there'd only be one!]"

"[Don't worry, he's probably just the main villain's elite mook; nothing to worry about. Actions speak louder than words, so just jump down in an impressive manner and start fighting already!]"

"[If you say so...]" having apparently concluded her conversation, Girlborg struck another heroic pose, and pointed her finger at Mordred. "I suggest you leave right now, or else I'll be force to... um, hurt you!"

Mordred was not amused by the newcomer's boast. "[Since thou speaketh the king's tongue, I shall make this as clear as I can. I mean thee no offense, milady, for whilst thou might be a fine combatant, to challenge me to single combat is to throw thine life away. Doest thou truly seek death's embrace, or art thou addled in the mind?]"

"[Uhhhh...]" The Amazingly Powerful Girlborg stood there for a moment, dumbfounded. "[I'm not exactly sure how to answer that.]" The then clenched her first. "[But if there's one thing I do know, it's that I'm not going to let your hurt anyone else!]"

"[A noble sentiment, to be sure...]" Mordred withdrew his sword. "[Since thy motives are pure, in the interests of fairness I shall let thee have the first blow.]"

"[...really?]"

"[By all means. Have a go at it.]"

"[Uh... okay then.]" Girlborg nervously hopped down to the first floor, and carefully made her way towards Mordred.

She made it about half-way when a blur rushed past her field of view.

Lightning to stoped not ten feet from Mordred as he pointed his sword at Simon's throat, causing her to drop a small, pill-shaped device she was carrying, which rolled up to Mordred's feet.

"Don't tempt me, wench." quipped Mordred. "One more step, and I can foresee much trouble breathing in this man's future." He picked up the trinket that Lightning dropped, and threw it behind him. "The battle is between me and the girl; though you may feel free to challenge me afterwards..."

Girlborg looked to Lightning for advice, but after a brief pause she simply responded by nodding gently. "...right." Girlborg said to herself. "No pressure." Gritting her teeth, she wound up an amateurish uppercut, and after a moments anticipation, launched herself directly at Mordred...

...And much to everyone's surprise (most of all Girlborg's), she found that the slightest touch sent the armor-clad figure hurtling through the roof and into the sky, where he soon became a blip off in the distance.

Girlborg looked at her hands in shock. "Did... I do that?"

"Not quite." Lightning handed Girlborg a silver pill-shaped capsule. "It's a gravity bomb; nullifies gravity within a meter's radius. I detonated one right before you hit him; elementary physics did the rest."

"I see..." he tried to hand it back to Lightning. "Do you want this one-"

"Keep it. You need the edge more than I do, anyway." Lightning turned her attention away from Girlborg, and went to check on Simon. "He's got a pulse. Lay him out so he's flat on his back."

As she did as Lightning said, Girlborg looked up at Morgaine, who was casually making her way towards Avalon's display case. "Shouldn't we do something about-"

"I know what I'm doing!" Lightning said. "Alright, looks fine for now..." Lightning held out her arm. She held her hands out over Simon, and they began to glow with a bright light. Girlborg watched in amazement as Simon's blood retreated into his body and his wounds began to seal themselves up. She even swore that she heard something that sounded like knucklebones shattering, but in reverse.

"Mrmrmmm... I'm gonna kill you... Bizzaro... Lincon." Simon mumbled as got up from the floor, yawning as if he had just had a bad night's sleep rather than being an inch away from death. He looked at Lightning, then at his fist, then at Girlborg, then back at Lightning again.

"...oh man, thanks, Light. I really screwed up, didn't I?"

"Well you're not exactly an expert at this. But we can talk about that later." Lightning pulled Simon back up to his feet. "Right now we still need to take care of Morgaine." She pointed at the sorceress, who was at this moment rounding the weapons gallery, passing the injured waiter as she approached Avalon.

"Okay." Simon stretched his arms. "Where are the others? Who's the newcomer?"

"If he was smart, Shulk would have left with the minister's son by now. So I'd say it's a fifty/fifty chance that they're heading down here as we speak." She looked at Girlborg. "As for her, this is..."

"I think I heard that much." said Simon. "Amazingly Powerful Girlborg, right?" he extended his hand towards the newcomer.

"Uh.. ha ha, yeah. That's right!" Girborg blushed at the sound her own name as she accepted Simon's handshake. "Sorry if the name's a bit of a mouthful. All the good ones were already taken."

"Hey, do you think if I had a choice I would call myself 'Simon the Digger'?" Simon grinned. "But I like it. It's nice and distinct, not to mention descriptive." He then let go of Girlborg's hand and pumped his fist at her. "So, whadda say we go kick some evil wizard butt?"

"Sorceress." corrected Lightning.

"Close enough! Let's do this!"

"Shouldn't we at least come up with some kind of plan?" said Lightning.

"The best kind of plan is the one you make up as you go along!" said Simon.

"Because that worked so well against Mordred."

"Yeah, well you were doing just fine against Morgaine."

"That's because I'm at least fifty times as strong, fast and durable as an ordinary human, not to mention I'm trained in handling this kind of thing."

"Well so am I... sort of. Maybe not that first, part, but I can hold my own in a-"

"I'm a technopath, if that helps..." said Girlborg. Sadly, her input fell on deaf ears.

"Look, you're a Mecha pilot, and a damn good one from what I hear. But you don't have the skills to-"

"You don't know anything about me! You're just a cop with superpowers, but my brother and I grew up in the streets-"

"Uh, guys?"

"Just because you say you're a hero doesn't mean you are-"

"Yeah, well, If you were always such a stickler to the rules you never would have become a L'cie in the first place!"

"Guys, she's almost-"

"Yeah, and look where that got us; Japan's most wanted and a month of hiding from the Justice League."

"You you still saved the world!"

"Look, if you're not going to, then I'm-"

"And nearly died in the process, I might add."

"You were just in the wrong place at the right time; that's what superheroing is all about and hey wait where did Girlborg go?"

Instinctively, the pair of bickering heroes looked to the side, where they found Girlborg standing in front of Avalon's display case, trying her best to look brave in front of the approaching villain.

"D-Don't come any closer!" she said. "I'm not letting you have this! Never!"

Morgaine continued her unflinching walk towards the reluctant heroine.

"I'm warning you! Don't come any closer or I'll... I'll... shoot laser beams at you!"

("Laser beams?" her earpiece quipped. "Is that really the best threat you could come up with?")

Finally, once she was within Inches of Girlborg's face, Morgaine put her hand on Girlborg's shoulder and asked "Tell me, child. Do you have a lover?"

A face instantly popped into Girlborg's head. "...y-yes?"

"Then I'm sure he'll be disappointed to learn of the virus that now converts your flesh to steel and clockwork even as we speak."

There was a flash of green light, and a sharp pain shot through Girlborg's arm. She watched in horror as her flesh began to tear, revealing not a simple array of bones and muscle, but a menagerie of springs, sprockets, gears and cogs.

("[Shirley? SHIRLEY! What's going-]" was the last thing Girlborg heard from the earpiece before it shorted out.)

"I'll leave you be, for now." Morgain pushed aside the broken clockwork girl. "I cannot think of a single fate worse than the one that you are already doomed to suffer." She looked back at Simon. "...Though perhaps it'll prevent those interlopers from interfering. After all, they don't want to risk infection, now, do they?"

"Damn it..." Lightning gritted her teeth.

Simon looked puzzled. "Infection? What's she talking about?" said Simon.

"Orthopoxvirus Machina, better known as the Machine Plague." Shulk dashed into the room, notably without Shinji behind him. "It's got a one hundred percent infectivity rate, and no cure. First it converts your body to metal, then it destroys your soul. In the end, it leaves nothing left but an empty shell..." he held up the Mondao. "I scanned the girl while she was doing that speech of hers, and as far as I can tell she's in the final stages of infection."

"Thought so." Lightning frowned. "The station would probably have her on file if she was a cyborg, and she's too human-like to be a robot and still be this inexperienced. Where's Shinji?"

"Safe with the Minister, and he's already called for a quarantine though I'm more worried about other potential carriers..."

"Right." Lightning glanced at Morgaine, who was at this very moment delicately carving a hole in Avalon's display cause using a magical beam projected from her fingertips. She then looked at a small, oblong-shaped flower vase that was nearby. "Either of you boys play football?"

Simon followed Lightning's gaze, and then returned a knowing look. "Well, I've always thought I'd make a good linebacker..."

"Hold up," Shulk began, "Are we talking American Football? Because I don't think I've ever played-" but before he could finish, Light and Simon bolted off like a pair of cheetahs just as Morgaine had pulled Avalon out of it's case.

Running as fast as her name implied, Lightning, carrying the empty flower vase, was the first to make it to the target, weapon drawn and ready to strike. But though Morgaine braced for an attack, instead of stabbing her in the face the Inspector tossed aside her weapon snatched the sheath out of Morgaine's hands in the middle of an elegant backflip. And when Morgaine turned to retaliate, she found herself taking the full blow of Simon's spiral-energy powered tackle. Though the sorceress was quickly throw Simon off her back using telekinesis, Simon's attack provided Lightning with enough of a distraction to stuff the artifact in the vase and toss it in Shulk's direction.

"Heads-up, halfback!" she said as the vase hurtled through the air.

Shulk dropped the Monado in surprise, nearly fumbling the vase as he realized what he had done. Without taking the time to remove the Sheath, he grabbed the sword and started to run for the exit, ducking hallways in hopes that he might be able to lose the sorceress that would soon be chasing after him.

As he exited the building and arrived safely on the open street, he thanked his lucky stars that he made it out in one piece. But then he heard a sound. Faint at first, but it quickly grew loud enough that he was able to make out some kind of "whooshing" noise. Just as he was wondering what it could be, he was suddenly struck with a vision an airborne projectile hurtling towards him at an unfathomable velocity. He immediately leapt to the ground, vase and sword in hand, crossing his arms in hopes that he wouldn't scrape his face against the pavement. In doing so, he cleared the way for Mordred, who at that moment had just returned from his trip to the stratosphere in an incredibly violent manner, stabbing his sword into the ground as he smashed into the pavement. The mere shockwaves sent Shulk tumbling head over heels, yet his grip on his possessions remained as firm as ever.

"['Twas most aggravating. I shall take care to lower my guard no longer.]" Mordred sighed as he drew his sword from the ground and pointed it at Shulk. "[Now, forgive my presumptuousness, but unless I am mistaken thou hath the demeanor and physique of a scholar, not a fighter. And whilst your weapon is no doubt potent, I highly doubt thou can match steel with one such as myself. So once more I ask thee; lay down thy arms and hand over thy spoils, and we can both walk out of this conflict satisfied.]"

Shulk scratched his head. "[Just one question.]" he said. "[If you're a really Mordred, why are you speaking in faux-elizabethan? By all accounts you should be speaking Middle English, or perhaps even Old English. You sound less like a serious threat, and more like a Shakespeare impersonator at a renaissance fair.]"

"[What's wrong with Shakespeare? I like shakespeare.]"

"[Well yes, so do I. But coming from you it sounds a bit... um... goofy.]"

"[Very well then.]" Mordred said in a more subdued manner. "[Would you prefer it if I talked like this?]"

"[Yes, that's much better.]"

"[WELL TOUGH!]" Mordred shouted, his armor cackling with dark energy. "[I SHALL CONTINUE TO TALKETH IN WHATEVER WAY I WILST, AND THOU SHALT CONSIDER THE MATTER CLOSED!]"

"[Gaah! Okay, you've made your point!]" shulk said. His mind began to race as he considered his options. ["I don't dare enragehim any further."] he thought. ["even if it turns out the Monado does work on this guy, he's just too strong... too fast..."] He looked down at Avalon, still stuck in the vace Shulk carried under his arm. ["Perhaps I could appeal to his chivalry. He'll probably spare me if I surrender, and perhaps that might be enough to prevent my vision..."] Shulk shook his head. ["But who knows what Morgaine will do with Avalon! Is an uncertain future really worth it if it prevents certain death?"] Having come up empty-handed for a solution, Shulk decided to stall for time. "[I don't suppose you'd be willing to explain your plan?]"

"[Dost thou taketh me for a simple-minded knave? Appealing to hubris may work on Luthor or Sivana, but not I.]"

"[Weellll... It's just that your mother doesn't have a very good reputation. In fact in all likelihood she's only using you to achieve her own ends.]"

"[As it should be! For it is a knight's duty to obey their sovereign, no matter what the consequences."]

"[That's ridiculous! You betrayed the Knights of the Round Table! How do you consider yourself a proper knight after murdering your king?"]

Mordred didn't even flinch at this question. "['Twas for the greater good, I assure thee.]" He readied his blade, and assumed a combat stance. "[Now, fight or flee: the choice is yours, scholar."]

Shulk removed Avalon from the vase, and wedged in a more convenient location between his belt. He then gripped the Monado in both hands, and a shaft of brilliant, blue energy extended from the blade. "How's this for an answer?"

* * *

From the television in his father's limo, Shinji watched as the battle between the heroes and Morgaine Le Fey spilled out onto the streets. He tried to ignore the newscasters commentary as he watched Lightning and Simon double-team the sorceress; taking advantage of both their numbers and the newly-discovered limitations of Morgaine's shield to punish her with a series of carefully coordinated attacks.

Shinji breathed a sigh of relief. "Looks like they'll be just fine without me..."

Suddenly, the newscaster's voice picked up, and the camera shifted to the other side of the museum, where Shulk, despite wielding a laser sword taller than his own body, appeared to be taking the beating of a lifetime from Mordred. Shinji watched squeamishly as Mordred delivered his beatdown with a rapid series of kicks and elbow jabs, only using his sword to parry Shulk's own feeble counterattacks. The only reason Shulk was still alive, Shinji realized, was that he seemed to disappear every time Mordred went for a killing blow.

Shinji looked as his father. He seemed too engrossed talking to someone apparently called "Checkmate" over the phone to be much help. He then turned to the driver. "STOP THE CAR!" he shouted, causing the limo to screech to a stop, and startling Gendo enough that he nearly dropped his phone.

"Heavens, Shinji, don't scream like that." He apologized to the person on the other end of the line, and put his phone on hold. "What's the matter?"

"Those people back there need me!" Shinji pointed to the screen. "I mean, I know I just got these powers and I don't really know how they work... but..." a nervous tear fell from his eye. "They saved my life and I just ran away! I mean there's a girl back there who-"

"...is a class-5 biohazard." Gendo interrupted. "I know who you're talking about; I've been watching the incident very closely, and I'm afraid she's a lost cause. And chances are the others are infected by now too."

"But what if they're not?" Shinji pleaded. "We have to do something!"

"The Black Knights are en route with their armored division, and the police are going to quarantine the area. I've sent word to Big Science Action, Super Young Team and the Justice League... but by the time they arrive it'll already be over..."

Frantically, Shinji unbuckled his seatbelt, lept onto the handle, shoved car door open, and started running back towards the museum. "Look I'm... sorry! I just gotta do this, okay!"

"Shinji? Come back here! SHINJI!" Gendo began to exit the vehicle, but stopped just outside of the car door, seeing that Shinji had hidden himself away in middle of the ongoing traffic jam.

* * *

"Well, maybe we did fail to stop the evil sorceress that even now is telekinetically dangling us upside-down by our ankles, but I think the important thing is that we tried."

"Please shut up." said Lightning.

"Yes, please, I grow tired of your wisecracks." said Morgaine. "And to think a pair of half-wits like yourselves forced me to be so... pragmatic." she shook her head. "Truly, I must be getting old."

"Hey, I'm just trying to stay positive!" said Simon. "Besides, she's already been trying to kill us. What's the worst that could happen?"

"She could send our souls to Hell."

"...she can do that?"

"Yep."

"Like, the actual, literal, capital H 'Hell'. Not a hell planet or a hell dimension or some kind of virtual hell. The real one."

"Yep."

Simon looked slightly worried, but the feeling quickly subsided. "Well... if she does that, then I'll kill Satan and break outta Hell myself!"

"The sad thing about this world is that's probably a legitimate plan." Morgain spread her hands and a magical circle appeared underneath the heroes. "Which is why I am instead going to bind your souls into a pair of eating utensils for my son Mordred, so that three meals a day you will be so very close to my supernaturally succulent foodstuffs, forever reminding you of the simple pleasures of your lost humanity, yet you will forever be unable to taste such things ever again."

"Thats... pretty damn cruel." said Simon.

"What can I say, I'm in a foul mood this week. No thanks to you two, of course..." She then placed a fork and a knife in the center of the circle, and began to chant her vile incantation.

Suddenly, Morgaine heard a shrill voice from off to the side. "Simon! I'm coming! Don't worry!"

"Now what..." Morgaine followed the source of the voice until she spotted a woman with strange-looking eyes and far too much hair running at her driving a robot shaped like a human face. It was probably the eighth most peculiar thing she had seen in her life, and certainly the strangest thing she had beheld today.

"Nia!" shouted Simon. "You came through!"

"I told you I would!" Nia replied. "Don't worry, I'll get you down! Just give me a second!"

If Morgaine was familiar with the cultural connotations of such an act, she probably would have rolled her eyes. "Another member of the fools parade, I see." She pointed her finger at Nia twirled it around. "**Wingardium leviosa.**"

Nia screamed as she found herself lifted off her feet and out of the Lagann, and soon she too found herself with the others, hanging upside-down above the magic circle.

"Yeah, some rescue." said Lightning.

"Sorry..." Nia tried her hardest not to tear up. "I didn't mean to-"

"Don't worry, that attack caught us off guard, too." said Simon. "And you did get the Lagann here; with any luck, our rescuer will be able to use it to turn the tables."

"Rescuer? What rescuer?" Morgaine said. "The boy had turned tail and fled, and even now, my son is finishing off the blonde one." she waked up to the Lagann to get a better look at it, wondering how the bizarre-looking contraption would be any sort of threat, what with it's stubby arms raised in the air like that. "All that's left is the girl, but she's in no condition to fight." she turned to face her victims once more. "Even if she was still conscious, how would she be able to operate such an automaton with only one arm? And if you ignore that, there is no way that I would allow myself to be beaten by that-"

The Laggan then brought it's mighty fists down own Morgaine's head, knocking the sorceress out with a single, swift blow.

"Huh." Nia stared at the mech in disbelief. "Did I do that? I don't think I did. Did I press the wrong button and activate the killer AI function?"

"Doubt it. I think we just got saved by someone Morgaine wasn't counting on..." Lightning pointed at the entrance to the museum.

Sure enough, Girlborg slowly limped out from behind the doorframe. "See...?" She murmured. "Technopathy... told you... it would work..." then she collapsed, falling face-first onto the pavement.

"We've got to help her!" said Nia.

"How?" said Lightning. "Last time I checked, we can't really do much but wait around for the magic to fade-"

And then they all fell to the ground.

"-away." Lightning got up, and shook her head. "This day just keeps getting better and better, does it?"

Nia started to run for the collapsed girl, but Lightning grabbed her by the shoulder. "Wait! That girl's contaminated with the Machine Plague! Don't get any closer."

"Relax." said Simon. "Nia's a physician and I'm a mechanic. If anyone's going to be able to save that girl, it's us." He removed Lightning's hand from Nia's shoulder, and together they approached the girl.

"Hm... no bleeding." Nia examined the girl from a distance as she put on a pair of rubber gloves that she kept in her purse. "That's a good sign... but that also means she's already in the advanced stages." Nia then flipped the girl onto her back, and put her ear on the girl's chest. "She's still breathing though, so she's apparently still alive..."

"Uhgh..." Girlborg moaned "I'm okay, I'm okay..."

"No you're not." said Lightning. "You're infected with a dangerous disease, and you're missing an arm."

"Not a big deal... I've got a friend who can fix it..." she said.

"A friend?" said Lightning. "You mean someone's been messing around with your insides?"

"...y-yes?"

"Great..." Lightning facepalmed. "Now we've got a potential outbreak on our hands..."

Nia tore off a piece of her dress, and wrapped it around the stump of Girlborg's arm like a torniquete. "I don't know if this'll help... but it might keep you from losing any more parts."

"Thanks..." the girl said.

"Now come on!" Simon said. "Let's all pile into the Lagann! Now that the gang's all here, I've got a plan to beat Mordred!"

"Let me guess." said Lightning. "We're going to punch him in the face."

"Exactly!" said Simon.

"And why do you think it's going to work this time?"

And so Simon told her.

* * *

Shulk let out a short scream as his face hit the pavement, chipping a tooth and no doubt making his black eye even worse than it was already.

"[I shall give you this much, scholar.]" Mordred said. "[Of all the fools I've killed, thou, perhaps, are the most dedicated. Tell me, why dost thou perseverest in the face of an impossible test?]"

"[There are... lives... on the line...]" Shulk said. "[Just... promise me... you won't kill the others...]"

"[Well of course I won't kill without due cause.]" Mordred replied. "[But given how violent their natures are, I may be forced to do so.]"

"[I see...]" Shulk coughed up some blood. "[I guess... I didn't... change... anything...]" He clutched the monado with his dear life.

"[Rest easy, scholar.]" said Mordred. "[For soon thou shalt be with God...]" He raised his blade high into the air, ready to deliver the final blow...

But just as the blade was about to strike, instead bounced off an barrier that appeared out of nowhere.

"[What trickery is this?]" Mordred looked around. "[Do the forces of fate haunt me still...]" He then spotted Shinji, peeking out from behind a nearby newsstand. "[...or is there yet a knave who knows not his place?]" He stomped towards the boy, grabbed him by his collar, and hoisted him high into the air. He then glared at Shinji, while the boy himself did his best not to wet his pants.

"Child, thy heroism is admirable, but misguided.]" Mordred said "[One more stunt like that and I shall be forced to-" Suddenly, he heard a heavy clanking noise come from behind him. "-kill you?"

Mordred glanced behind himself, and saw a stout, red, face made out of metal, with stubby arms and legs sprouting out of the sides, grab Shulk and toss him into it's head, where the broken young man slipped through some kind of membrane. Mordred didn't have much time to contemplate all this before the Laggan sprang forward and snatched Shinji right out of his grasp, and tossed him to into the membrane.

"[...I know not what kind of weapon this is... nor do I care! Show thyself, so that you may die with dignity!]"

Meanwhile, inside the Lagann, it soon became apparent that the cockpit was not in fact made for six people.

"I don't like this plan so far..." said Girlborg.

"Trust me, it gets better!" said Nia.

"It's not like it can get much worse..." said Lightning

"Simon? Lightning? What is this?" said Shulk.

"This, my good friend, is the Lagann, the most powerful mech in the universe! It was our secret weapon against Spiral Kingdom, and now it's our secret weapon against Mordred!" Simon pointed to the furious knight on the display screen.

"But that's crazy!" Shinji yelped. "We saw what that guy did to you; he's freakin invincible!"

"Beat the invincible! Do the impossible! That's what my bro used to say!" he pumped his fist in the air. "This thing runs on nothing guts and fighting spirit, like a big, robot-shaped Green Lantern ring! So I say we combine our willpower, and show this literal bastard what we're made of!"

Shulk struggled to look at the Monado's screen. "That might actually work! It says here that our combined willpower output is bordering on 1.4 Megascotts. If your robot works like you say..."

Lightning sighed. "I should be saying 'this will never work', but honestly I'm sick of being proven wrong. Let's do this."

"Right!" Simon pressed a button, and the cockpit flipped open, revealing everyone to Mordred.

"So thou thinkst thou can gang up on me?" he reeled back in laughter. "HA! How many times must I prove myself to thou before I hear thy surrender?"

"We've got news for you, pal!" Simon said. "For you, the dark ages are just getting started!"

"...really? That's the best you could come up with?" said Lightning.

"Hey, it's not like I spent all night practicing one liners in case I run into a knight (Okay yes I do)."

"I see a natural 1 in your future, pal!" said Shulk.

Lightning just stared at him. "...that's even worse."

"We'll hit you so hard, even your mother will feel it?" said Girlborg.

"That's probably the best we're going to get..." said Lightning.

Simon flipped down his goggles. "WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK WE ARE!?"

He then flipped the cockpit back down and told everyone to grab onto the controls and think about punching Mordred.

Outside of the Lagann, the mech's arms suddenly turned into drills, which grew a heck of alot longer over the course of a couple seconds, before fusing and then expanding into a drill that was at least ten times the size of the Lagann itself.

"[Thou could send a dozen such attacks at me and I wouldn't even flinch!]" said Mordred "[Bringeth it on!]"

And indeed they did. The lagann's legs then turned into rockets, which propelled the mech at its intended target: Mordred's helmet. He tried to block the attack with his sword, but it came too fast to him to react. Instead, he was treated to the agonizing sound of steel scraping against steel, with the drill slowly boring into the helmet.

"JUST A... BIT... LONGER..." Simon said through his bared teeth.

Suddenly the Monado began to emit a series of piercing beeps.

"CAN YOU TURN THAT DAMN THING OFF!?" shouted Lightning "IT'S HARD FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE."

"I CAN'T, IT'S AN AUTOMATED ALERT!" Shulk glaced down at the Monado. "IT SAYS THERE'S A TRANS-SPACIAL GATEWAY FORMING RIGHT BEHIND US! IT LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S TELEPORTING IN, AND FA-"

Just then, the cabin shook as what was presumably the thing the Monado had detected crashed into the Lagann, throwing the whole thing off balance, jostling the Lagann's shell open and sending everyone inside flying out of the mech and onto the pavement. For Mordred, the effect was more akin to a nail being stuck by a hammer: before returning to normal size, the Lagann's drill shattered a large chunk of his helmet, and sent the knight toppling over. The Lagann, meanwhile, tumbled to a stop somewhat behind Mordred, and the unknown projectile itself crashed into the ground, leaving a small impact crater situated somewhere between Mordred and the heroes.

"Well... didn't see that coming." Simon rubbed his aching forehead.

"Technically we did." said Shulk as he helped Girlborg off the ground. "We just didn't have enough time to prepare."

"What was that, anyway?" said Girlborg.

"Reinforcements would be my guess." said Lightning. "I mean what else would it be: some random girl we've never met before who just falls out of the sky for no reason?"

Just then, a young girl, perhaps no older than 10 crawled out of the impact crater. She had medium-length black hair and pale skin, and was wearing a plain black baseball cap, as well as a t-shirt with a stylized depiction of an armored figure, with an english caption below the image implying the figure was named "Wild Tiger". Despite her clothes being torn in several places, she seemed to be in remarkably good shape for someone who just survived an impact like that. She stood up, looked up into the air, raised her fists into the sky and shouted "[HELOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO STERNBILD!]" before fainting.

"...Next time, just say 'a sack full of free money.'" said Simon.

"Noted." said Lightning. She looked over at Mordred, who was now raging with fury, covering the missing part of his facemask with a free hand, and screaming a string of shakespearean insults at anyone who would listen.

"[Thou cullionly plume-plucked whey-face! Thou lumpish earth-vexing ratsbane! I shall wring thee limb from limb until thy bones crumble to dust!]"

Lightning ignored Mordred's ramblings for the time being.

"So what are going to do now?" said Shinji. "Without your robot, we can't even leave a dent in the guy..."

"I'm thinking, I'm thinking..." Simon bit his upper lip in frustration.

"Um, actually, I think I might have an idea..." Shulk said, his voice cracking a bit. "But you're going to have to promise not to interrupt and let me do the talking."

"Well, you probably do have the most tact out of all of us..." Lightning said. "Go ahead. Let's see what this plan of your is..."

Grasping Avalon in his left hand, Shulk slowly approached Mordred, taking care to step around the still-unconscious girl lying between them.

When he was about ten feet away, Mordred took notice of Shulk's presence and said ["SCHOLAR, TIS LUNACY FOR YOU TO COME AND FACE ME ALONE! IT IS TOO LATE FOR REPARATIONS, NOW OUR FEUD MUST BE SETTLED IN COMBAT, WITH OUR ARMOR DRENCHED IN-]"

"[Here.]" Shulk dropped Avalon to the ground, and stepped back. "[It's yours.]"

"[-THE BLOOD OF OUR, wait. What didst thou say?]"

"[Avalon. It's yours. It's no longer worth fighting over.]" he took a deep breath. "[Especially since it's a fake.]"

"[WHAT?!]" Mordred bellowed.

"[We believe that the previous curator of the exhibit, Sir Crocodile, sold it to an unknown party for a hefty sum over ten years ago. We belive that someone is a member of the Clock Tower, one of the three main branches of the Mages Association. I'm here on behalf of Atlas, another one of the branches, to identify if the Avalon in the collection is the real thing or not for the investigation.]"

"[So... thou art a bringer of justice?]"

"[No, I'm just one step in the process. Once I've identified that foul play has been committed, Atlas will bring the matter to the attention of Interpol, Interpol will track down the ones responsible (with some nudges in the right direction by Atlas), whatever family is responsible will use their political clout to get the heat off themselves, but they'll look incredibly foolish in the process.]"

"[And the man responsible for this corruption? Will he face judgement?]"

Shulk shrugged. "[...perhaps he'll lose some status within his house, but from a legal standpoint he'll probably get away with it.]"

"[That's preposterous!]" Mordred exclaimed, crushing the fake Avalon between his fist. ["If thy story is true, then I swear on my honor that I will track this man down and slay him myself!"]

"[...not really sure that's a good idea, but you're welcome to try.]" Shulk coughed. "[Now... do you think we could have a-"]

["A truce? Yes, now that we have nothing to fight over, that would be a splendid idea. All I must do is convince mother, and then I will be off."] Mordred then began to walk away. ["Fare thee well, scholar! May we meet again, on more amicable-"] Mordred suddenly stopped as his ears picked off a faint rumbling in the distance. ["Hark! I hear the sound of many wheels scraping against asphalt, unrelenting. What in God's name could the source of this racket be?"]

Moments later, dozens upon dozens of Knightmare Frames poured in from every direction, their chests gleaming with the silver emblem of the Black Knights. The twenty-foot-tall mecha came to a halt in a circle around Mordred, their land-spinners screeching in response to the sudden change in velocity, and aimed their enormous rifles directly at Mordred.

"[Oh silly me.]" Mordred shook his head. "[The answer 'twas robots... on roller skates.]"

From behind a nearby building, one last Frame emerged. It very different from the others; it could fly for one thing. But rather than the stout, economical shape of the Sutherland models, this Knightmare frame was slim and sleek, almost anorexic if not for it's bulky shoulder, chest and knee-plates. It's color scheme was different, too. Rather than the purple-and-black pattern that the other Knightmare Frames wore, this one was almost entirely black, with gold plating on the shoulders, knees and helmet, as well a red, glowing, backpack-looking device that no doubt the source of the Knightmare Frame's flight.

"[Criminal!]" boomed a voice from the flying Mecha. "[I am Zero, and we are the Black Knights: a global force for justice!" The voice paused to let that sink in. "You have five seconds to surrender!]"

Mordred's fist clenched in anger. "[Thou call thyselves knights!?]" he said. "[Thou art nothing but charlatans masquerading as-]"

"All units, fire!" Zero shouted, and at that moment, every one of the Knightmare frames under his command opened fire on Mordred. For a full minute, nothing but the sounds of the Black Knights' rifles could be heard, and nothing could be seen but the flash of muzzle fire and the endless spray of bullets.

But when the smoke cleared, Mordred was still standing, uninjured as ever.

"Oh come on, that never works!" shouted Simon.

"Relax, I've seem them do this before." said Lightning, "Watch this..."

"HA!" he said. "It doesn't matter how many times thee throwest thyselves against me; for my power is beyond that of any mortal-"

And then, suddenly, a hexagonal prism appeared in a flash of crimson light, cutting him off mid-sentence and freezing him in place.

Girlborg, almost fatigued to the point of collapsing, thought for a moment that she was hallucinating voices, only to realize that she was somehow picking up the Knights' radio signals.

"Good work, but you cut it a little close this time." she heard Zero say.

"Waddya talking about?! we were only off by six seconds!" she heard another voice say.

"It takes exactly one minute, eleven seconds for the Absolute Defense Field to ready it's capture program. After our legally-mandated five-second warning, that means you need to occupy the target's attention with sustained gunfire for one minute, five seconds. And six seconds would have been more than enough time for Black Adam or Bizzaro to tear us all to pieces." said Zero."We were lucky that this villain was fond of monologuing..."

"Oh, like you're one to talk!" the other man said.

She tried to tune out the conversation. It reminded her too much Lelouch's own lectures. Lelouch's encyclopedic knowledge on the numbers of absolutely everything was one of his more endearing traits, and she didn't want to associate him with that mercenary, Zero. After all, who else but Loulou would know that the average villain speech was thirty seconds long, or that hostage-takers have an effective reflex of about 1.5 seconds, or that you could delay most villains indefinitely with a long enough speech...

...and that's when Girlborg realized that, now that the Knightmare frames had taken care of Mordred, they were now turning their attention to the group themselves.

"Vigilantes!" Zero said. "It is possible that you may be infected with a deadly virus. Surrender now, or we'll be forced to take drastic measures!" he then repeated his message in English, just in case.

"[Hey, wait a second!]" Girlborg said, "[I thought we were on the same side!]"

"[They are.]" Shulk said. "[Don't worry, they're not going to hurt us. They're just being cautious because you're infected with the Machine Plague...]"

"[The what?]" said Girlborg.

"[You mean you don't know?]" said Lightning.

"No!" said Girlborg. "[I just... after those robots attacked, when I went to get breakfast the next day I got a refrigerator magnet stuck to my arm, and-]"

"[Wait... what robots?]" said Shulk.

"[You know... that ones that attacked Okinawa a couple months ago... I was on vacation then...]"

"[What. Did. They. Look. Like?]" Shulk began to tremble with excitement.

Girlborg leaned back a little, creeped out by Shulk's reaction. "[Uh... I dunno... giant lobsters or something?]"

Shulk reached into his pocket, and pulled out a fancy cell-phone. A couple minutes later, he held it up to Girlborg's face, where it displayed a picture of a dark-blue, bipedal contraption with an hunched back, no noticeable head or neck, and glowing red eyes, generously decorated with gold patterns. "[Tell me, did they look anything like this?]"

Girlborg took the phone, and squinted at the image as her vision began to blur. It did look familiar, somehow. "[...I think so. I wasn't really paying attention, but...]"

Shulk immediately snatched the phone away, and frantically started dialling. "[Dickson? It's Shulk. Listen, I've got big news... uh-huh... yes I know that's important but it can wait. It's about the Mechon... no, don't worry, I haven't gone there yet. It's about the attack on Okinawa... that's just it: I think I've found a survivor... well yes she is, but she's also fully sentient. Do you know what this could mean? I mean it is a bit too early to get my hopes up, but Fiora could still be- …ah, right, I'll keep quiet. Just... try to get here as soon as you can.]"

The last thing Girlborg heard before she fell unconscious was another one of the Knights' radio transmissions. "This is squad alpha; mission accomplished. Target one is secured and the quarantine was successful..."

* * *

"Roger that, Alpha." Kallen said. "Beta leader, here. Squad is fanning out, searching for stragglers. I'm moving to capture secondary target." From the cockpit of the Guren Mk. II (not to be confused with "The Gur**r**en", a similarly named mech that people kept confusing the Mk. II with for some reason), perhaps the most powerful unit in the Black Knights' arsenal, she had perhaps the best view of the battle below. The Float System her mech wore was still just a prototype, so it was only reserved for the best pilots. And Kallen was the best. By several orders of magnitude, in fact.

True, the Mk. II's bright red armor and enormous metal claw made it stand out from the rank and file, but this only caused enemies to make the mistake of going after her first. It was a mistake they usually didn't live to make a second time; the Guren Mk. II's arm could emit nearly any form of radiation: from microwaves to zeta beams to green-k. The arm alone was a formidable weapon against nearly anything under the sun.

So it came as a bit of a surprise when Zero refused to let her proceed. "Negative, Beta." he said. "Target is too dangerous to approach solo. Wait for backup."

"With all due respect, sir, target has already proven to be capable of long-distance teleportation. We might not get a second chance."

"...very well. But at the first sign of trouble, abort mission. I repeat, at the first sign of trouble, abort mission."

Kallen turned off her radio. "Right..." she sighed, "...no pressure." After all she was just going to capture an immortal witch with mysterious powers by using a weapon that would probably be at least seven types of illegal if anyone bothered to actually look at the schematics. Still, as long as she kept a few feet of metal between herself and Morgaine, Kallen figured she'd probably be safe.

Probably.

The MK II touched near where the vigilantes had beaten the Sorceress; about thirty feet from the museum, right in the middle of the road. Plenty of space to maneuver on foot, and she could easily take to the air if she had to. She turned on her monitor and saw that, indeed, Morgaine Le Fay was lying right where they had left her.

"Well, it looks that way at least..." Kallen mused. "Still, I'd better make sure. Just gotta turn on this scanner, and..."

...the monitor turned to static.

"Huh. That's funny..." Kallen flipped the switch again, to no avail. "Is the damn thing busted again?"

Suddenly, a hand burst out of the monitor, and grabbed Kallen by the throat. The hand could have been best described as "armored", if only because there wasn't a word for "covered entirely in tiny padlocks arranged in a way that resembled crude scale armor".

"[Sorry about this, 'luv.]" said a thickly-accented english voice. "[Can't let you go 'bout capturing this one. She'd kill you if you tried, and we can't have that happening, now can we? Especially when I need you so much, miss...]" the voice paused. "[Kozuki? Or Stadtfeld? Oh well, it doesn't especially matter because they're both wrong. Or both right. Depends on your point of view.]"

"[What... do you... want...?]" Kallen gasped.

"[What? I don't want anything! ...no, wait, that's a lie: I want a lot of things. But for you, right here, right now, I don't want anything. In fact, I want to give you a gift. A most wonderful gift, in fact...]"

The hand gripped tighter on Kallen's throat.

"[I want you to see the world as it truly is...]"

**-END OF CHAPTER-**

BETHANY SNOW: Welcome to Chanel 52 News. Our top story for tonight, the case of the disappearing children. All around the world, teenage girls are vanishing at an alarming rate with no apparent pattern. We now bring you live to reporter A. Bug, and his interview with detective Harvey Bullock of the Gotham P.D. on the disappearance of Deborah Blank, 14 years old.

HARVEY BULLOCK: Ah, well, it's kind of a strange case ya see. Yer everyday middle-class schoolgirl. No ransom note, no mob ties, no nothin. Only thing strange about her was that some girl that used to bully her died of a heart attack a few months ago, but if she had supah-powers we woulda heard about it already. That and she was really into the animes, but it ain't like that's a lead or anythin.

AMBUSH BUG: So are you saying that this is the work of a mind-reading, telepathic nerdy pedophile?

HARVEY BULLOCK: Well we ain't gonna rule it out just yet, but-

AMBUSH BUG: You heard it first, folks! Lock your doors and burn your DVD players! We've got a madman on the loose!

HARVEY BULLOCK: Now wait just a second I didn't say-

BETHANY SNOW: Fascinating. In other news, d-list hero Sora Hibiki has returned to earth after being absent for over a year and a half.

CALENDER MAN: For those not aware of Sora, he's a young man who wields an impractically-shaped weapon called a Keyblade, which is said to be our only line of defence against monsters called The Heartless, who are probably the cutest eldritch abominations this side of Hello Cthulhu. Assisting him were fellow d-listers G'nort the Green Lantern and Klarion the Witch Boy, though recent developments say that perhaps Sora doesn't deserve an the credit attributed to him. We now take you to our darkened studio, where our anonymous informant will hopefully shed some light on the matter.

TOTALLY NOT KLARION THE WITCH BOY: Yeah, Klarion was doing all the work. Sora and G'nort was just eating potato chips and stuff. Did I mention Klarion was awesome? Because he totally is.

CALENDER MAN: Fascinating. Back to you, Bethany.

BETHANY SNOW: Now we turn to our foreign correspondent, Dr. W for an update on the Clock Tower situation.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Thanks, Bethany. I'm here at the ruins of the clock tower known as "Big Ben", thought technically that's just the name of the bell. But that's not important! What is important is that someone blew it up, and we don't know how or why, but we do know when! Because, erm. It's a clock. Obviously. Of course, that's not much if you don't know where the perp is in the first place, but no worries! I'm sure they'll find him eventually.

BETHANY SNOW: Thank you, Doctor. Coming up: an interview with Most Excellent Superbat as part of our ongoing special on the Super Young Team. Also: Unicorns; fact or fiction? Here, on Channel 52.

**-AUTHORS NOTES-**

Okay I admit it Simon's last name came from putting the word "Drill" into google translate.

Yes I am very obviously Simon X Nia. But if you despise mushy stuff, rest assured that romance is only a part of this fic; not the whole thing. Trust me, there's going to be plenty of action and lasers and robots and magic and angst and dinosaurs and punching and kicking and more angst and guns and conspiracies to keep you occupied.

I am pretty sure that Tokyo does not have a national history museum. OH WELL I GUESS IT DOES NOW.

Also I don't actually know if Lightning's rank of "Inspector" is appropriate for a police detective since I don't really know much about the japanese police force. So there's two possibilities here: Either I will do the research and covertly replace all references to "Inspector" with the appropriate rank, or I will not do the research and just assume that in this universe her rank is actually correct..

I based Morgaine Le Fey's physical appearance mostly on her appearance in issue 12 of Demon Knights, while her association with Mordred is something borrowed from the DCAU... though obviously I put a major twist on it, since in the DCAU he's a bratty kid while here Mordred is as least a teenager, if not an adult who appears to be horribly, horribly overpowered.

Speaking of which, this is not explicitly set in any actual version of the DCU. Rather, it's a version of the DCU that has anime characters in it, and has always had anime characters in it. The explanation is that these stories come from an alternate universe where DC at some point bought the rights to translate publish Manga in the U.S. during the Silver Age. In order to promote these manga series, they started introducing characters from those series into DC's comics' universe, usually as guest stars explicitly from alternate realities, though it was rare for DC characters to appear the original work (though Osamu Tezuka's "Astro Boy" was a notable exception, as Will Magnus, The Metal Men, and Dr. T.O. Morrow ended up becoming recurring characters). When Crisis on Infinite Earths happened, they still decided to keep Manga and Anime characters in the new DCU, though it was made abundantly clear that these were separate from the "canon" versions of the characters.

A few notable facts about this version of the DCU:

Vash the Stampede is currently The Red Hood. Most people in-universe think Vash died during the events of Armageddon 2001, where Millions Knives (who at the time was in the Justice League pretending to be a "reformed" Vash the Stampede) was revealed to be Monarch instead of Captain Atom or Hawk.

Fate/Stay Night was never an H-Game. Instead, Kinoko Nasu became a writer at DC, and worked with Gen Urobuchi to incorporate his ideas into "Fate Origin/Fall", a miniseries with plot very similar to Fate/Zero. He also became a co-writer for JSJ.

Andrew Hussie did not go into webcomics, and instead made a bunch of weird (but popular!) batman stories before being handed the reigns to work with Grant Morrison on an Animal Man miniseries about Grant and Hussie's author avatars making up new, ridiculously overpowered villains to kill each other's characters so said authors could seize control of the miniseries, and then trying to wrap it into a coherent plot after they call a truce in the final issue.

What does any of this have to do with the plot? Probably nothing!

Also, in real life japan has an extremely low crime rate. But we're going to ignore this fact because it would be a pretty boring superhero story if nothing interesting happened.

Also also; is GINO (Gendo-In-Name-Only) actually a good guy in this universe, or does he have some kind of hidden agenda? WOOOOOOOO ITS A MYSTERY.

Also also also, before anyone points this out to me I already know that you don't vote for the prime minister, at least in japan. But Simon doesn't know that.


	2. Chapter 2

[FRONT COVER: The cover shows a picture of the main characters from the last issue in facility of some sort, trapped behind glass windows. In the center is Girlborg, who is being examined by a bunch of guys in hazmat suits. In the room to the left of Girlborg, Simon and Nia are banging on the glass, while Lightning just looks bored in the room to the Right of Girlborg. In the room to the right of Girlborg, Shinji is lying on a couch, talking to a psychologist in a hazmat suit. Below Girlborg, Shulk has a thumbtack bulletin board that is full of indistinct pictures, drawings and papers, like some kind of conspiracy theorist. The only legible thing is the words "Mechon =] Virus =] Aglets?" written across several papers in red marker. A caption informs the reader that once again this story is "NOT A DREAM! NOT AN IMAGINARY STORY!" A caption underneath this statement says "Our heroes are now under..." followed by the words "QUARANTINE" in big, imposing letters.]

* * *

If there was one thing that Yokoda Memorial Hospital prided itself on, it was its emergency response speed. Even while understaffed and overcrowded with those injured in the wake of Super Young Team's battle with the Ten Ben Matanga they always found a way to squeeze in an injured hero or two, even for such unexpected circumstances as possible infection with a deadly virus.

"Of course we've only taken preliminary steps at this point." Masamichi Sonoda, head of the Tokyo Police Cataclysm Division, adjusted his glasses as best he could from within his hazmat suit. "We still need to set up additional quarantine points, send out alerts, inform the media, et cetera, etcetera. Thankfully, the carrier's been more than cooperative; she practically gave us her whole life story."

"Skip to the important bits." said Lightning, examining the contents of a manilla folder. "I'll read the rest of it later." The work was a welcome change of pace, as there was nothing to look at in the stark, white hospital room but a single television, two beds, and a blue curtain that neatly divided the room, and a 12th-floor view of the Tokyo skyline that she had already gotten bored with.

"Right." Sonoda glanced at his clipboard. "Her name is Shirley Fenette; she's an American student attending Ashford Academy. Just as you said, she apparently contracted the virus during the attack on Okinawa. Supposedly, another student pulled her to safety after she was nearly swallowed by a, and I quote, 'big lobster robot' that we identified as 'Unknown Automaton 132'."

"The kid from the Mages Association called it a 'Mechon'." Lightning added. "Those guys play pretty close to their chests. But throw the name around, ruffle a few feathers, and someone might spill the beans just to save face."

"I'll keep that in mind..." the captain jotted down a reminder on his notepad. "Anyway, the girl suffered minor injuries while fleeing Okinawa, but she did not seek treatment, as she said she 'didn't want her father to worry'. In addition, she and her fellow travelers had left via private yacht, so they were able to bypass the checkpoint we set up after the fact."

"So of course when she started to turn to metal, she decided to play hero..." Lightning looked at the photograph of the orange-haired teen. "It's always the rich kids the ones who lack common sense?"

"It gets worse." he handed Lightning a map of the city. The red area indicates the roaming distance of an average Ashford Academy student. The blue area is the area the carrier covered on her 'patrols'. Between these two, that's about twenty-five percent of the city that could be infected, and given the lengthy incubation period..."

"Looks like you've got your work cut out for you then. What about the other girl? Any info on her?"

"Yes, but nothing all that useful." he handed her a ream of papers. "Her name is Hope. This is a transcript of everything she's said within the past three hours. At this point we know is her shoe size, her favorite color, her favorite videogame, her favorite Pokémon, her favorite TV shows, her favorite episodes of her favorite tv shows, her favorite parts of her favorite episodes of her favorite tv show, her favorite movies, her favorite books, her favorite internet celebrities, her favorite flavor of ice cream. We might also have her name, depending on whether "Hope" is a first name or an alias..."

"The name's more common than you'd think. I knew a boy named that, believe it or not." Lightning set the transcript aside. "And let me guess, she's running away from home."

"Yep. Said she was going to Sternbild to become the sidekick of someone named 'Wild Tiger'..."

"D-lister. Part of an american reality TV-Show. Call the network and see if they got any strange calls or fan mail recently. I'd also suggest checking for Metagene activity. Kids don't usually fall out the sky and walk away unharmed..."

"Already done. Her genes are normal, though given how she immediately regenerated during a blood test it's clear that she has powers of some sort. Plus, there was this." Sonoda pointed a photograph of the girl's forehead, unobscured by either hair or her hat, revealing a bright red tattoo of a dragon looping around to eat it's own tail. Inside the loop were three red triangle arranged into a larger triangle, leaving small gaps above which three smaller triangle were arranged around. Inside the triangle themselves was a design that looked like snake a wrapped around a crucifix, with a pair of little wings above the cross and a crown above the pair of wings.

"It's an Oroboros." said Lightning. "That could mean anything from alchemy to ancient egypt. Come back when you've got something more substantial." Lightning then turned to look back at her papers. "Don't worry about me. For now, hang tight and try not to attract too much attention. My guess is the kid's parents are a real nasty piece of work. Weird experiments and stuff. Soon as this disease thing is over and done with, I'll get on the case. "

The room hung silently.

Sonoda reached to put away his glasses, only to realize that there was no way he could do so without taking off the suit. "...Farron, we need to talk."

"I'm not going to die anytime soon, captain. You know as well as I do that I'm immune to-"

"It's not that. It's more like... your attitude." Sonoda looked up at the ceiling as he tried to collect his thoughts. "What I'm getting at is that you have a reputation as a loose cannon."

Lightning didn't even look up. "It's exaggerated. I don't make arrests off duty, I always get a search warrant, I don't beat perps as a form of interrogation..."

"True, at least on paper your track record is impeccable..." He coughed. "The problem is... not everyone else sees it that way. I've been getting complaints about your attitude towards your officers. One Chief Hirukawa, for instance, seems convinced that you've been purposely trying to ruin his career..."

"By thwarting a Yakuza operation happening right under his nose?"

"He did ask you to leave it to his department..."

"Well, you'd think he'd be more grateful..."

"And then there's your whole "Fal'cie" incident."

"That wasn't our fault. We were just at the wrong place at the wrong time."

"Innocent or not, 'Japan's Most Wanted' isn't something you can just sweep under the rug. Not to mention the fact that you're still are technically a L'cie... and... well..." He handed Lightning a yellow piece of paper. "You're demoted to paperwork until further notice."

"...You've got to be joking!" said Lightning. "This city would be nothing more than a smoking crater if it weren't for-"

The chief suddenly raised his voice, "DO YOU THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT?!" he then caught himself. "Sorry. Nerves. You know how it is." He took a deep breath before continuing. "The fact of the matter is, between the whole Fal'cie debacle, the crises, and Ikari's cataclysm, people are still distrusting of metahumans. The public barely tolerates Big Science Action despite all the good they do, and outside the 18-to-24-year-old demographic Super Young Team is seen as almost a joke." he flipped to the next page. "And then there's complaints from more 'traditional' officers about your gender, complaints from 'traditional' mothers about being a poor role model, threats from the Mages Association..."

"You're not honestly telling me you listen to that pack of inbreds..."

"I do when their political cronies threaten to slash my budget." Sonoda turned to another page. "I'm working out a corruption case against them, but until then I can't risk you acting out in public. There's more than enough forensic work to occupy your time..." He then handed Lightning the rest of the clipboard. "Hopefully this'll all blow over, but it'll take a while."

Lightning thought about trying to argue her case some more, but she knew Sonoda well enough that he was probably telling the truth. He couldn't blame the man for putting his career over hers. After all, Sonoda was married and had a kid to take care of while Lightning was single and not in any hurry to settle down. It's not that she found the idea of starting an intimate relationship repulsive or anything (hell, she could spend hours rattling off the names of her high school exes), but more that she had yet to work out the logistics. That, and being able to bend steel with one's bare hands was usually a turn-off.

"Got it, sir." she said.

"Good. Once you're clear, report to me and I'll give you your next assignment. Until then, think of this as paid vacation time." And with that, Captain Sonoda took his leave.

Once she was sure no one was watching, Lightning slumped back onto her bed, and sighed. "Back to square one again, I see..."

"Is something wrong?"

Lightning jolted from her bed, sending papers flying everywhere. She had almost forgotten about her roommate.

"It's... Farron, right?" A hand pulled back the curtain to the left of Lightning to reveal Nia, her slightly uncanny face as bright and cheerful as ever. "Lightning Farron?"

Lightning immediately closed the curtain, and rolled to her side. The last thing she needed right now was a ray of sunshine beaming at her with those strange, flower-shaped pupils to remind her how much her day sucked.

Nia, of course, taking no notice of this, opened the curtain again. "I'm sorry, but I just wanted to thank you for helping my husband last night. You were very good at that whole "crime fighting" thing. Maybe you and Simon should team up more often!"

"I'm not doing that anymore." Lightning mumbled.

"What?"

"I said I'm not doing that anymore." she repeated, this time in a louder voice.

"I know. I head the whole thing, and I'm sorry to hear that..." Nia said. "...it's just too bad that the police don't like Fal'cie..."

Despite her continued slump, Lightning's finely-tuned insticts couldn't detect a trace of dishonesty in Nia's voice.

"...but your boss is right! With any luck this will all blow over, and you'll be back on the streets in no time!"

"...do you even know what a L'cie is?"

"It's a kind of space alien, right?"

Lightning rolled her eyes. "No. L'cie are living weapons created by the Fal'Cie, which are... well, do you remember a couple years back when they found those giant crystals deep underneath Tokyo?"

"The ones that tried to destroy the world? I think so, but Simon and I were on Rann that month, so I kinda missed most of the details..."

Lightning facepalmed. "Of course you were. Well those things were Fal'cie, and they create L'cie to complete a task called a "focus" under the threat of a fate worse than death. I was turned into a L'cie with a bunch of others when I tried to rescue my sister, and we were tasked with destroying the world. But we obviously ignored that and spent a month running from just about Justice League. Then we killed this big Fal'cie and somehow we saved the world and my sister forever. The end."

Lightning glanced at Nia and was surprised to find that her half-assed story had nearly moved the girl to tears. "Aww... you saved the world AND your sister, and not even the police are grateful? That's terrible!"

"Is this girl for real?" Lightning shook her head. "No, it can't be. It has to be an act. No one could possibly be this dense-" Lightning thought back to a certain musclehead that her sister was engaged to. "Okay never mind."

"You can say that again." Lightning said. "It didn't help that I took the blame for leading everyone there to become L'cie in the first place. Couldn't let her ruin her career as a fashion designer just as it was getting started..."

Nia's tears welled further. "And you took the blame for your sister, too?! You really are the greatest!" she sneezed into a handkerchief. "But wait, How did you get onto the police?"

"Well for one thing were supernaturally blackmailed; Our focus was to either destroy the city, or go insane and turn into monsters that would destroy the city anyway. The fact that we saved Tokyo helped. Plus, I was a cop beforehand. I had great credentials; a dual major in criminology and forensics, and I already had a few years experience under my belt. Once I was cleared of all charges I was allowed back on the force. Do you have any more stupid questions?"

"Well, I was thinking... if you prefer fieldwork so much, perhaps I can talk to someone about it... you know, 'pull a few strings', as they say?"

Lightning closed the curtain. "No thanks."

Nia pulled them back open. "No, seriously! I've got some high-society friends! Maybe they can-"

"Nia, you're dating a grease monkey with a hero complex and testosterone poisoning, your father was a supervillain. If anyone listens to you, it's because they're too polite to do otherwise. Please go away."

"How? We're stuck in the same room together..."

"...I was- look. I don't know. Just watch TV or something."

"...okay..." Nia closed the curtain, and got back onto her bed. She looked up at the ceiling, and tried her best not to think about what kind of agony Simon was going through, cooped up in that hospital room all day.

* * *

Simon tried his best not to think about what kind of agony Nia was going through, cooped up in that hospital room all day. He figured she was going stark raving mad-

Well, maybe not madper-se. Simon couldn't imagine his girlfriend being mad in any sense of the word. Loopy, certainly, but notmad. But it's not like he had anything else to think about, Simon was on the verge of going crazy himself with all the frantic scribbling, rustling of papers, and occasional calls to room service for equipment and caffeine coming from Shulk's side of the room. It would be bad enough if he had only been doing it all day, but Shulk had managed to keep the racket up all last night as well. And while Simon was no stranger to sleepless nights, after a day like yesterday he had kind of looked forward to getting some shuteye.

Eventually, curiosity got the better of Simon and he decided to peek through the curtain. What he found was a whiteboard covered in equations, and enough thumbtacks and bulletin boards to frighten even the most paranoid of conspiracy theorists. And there Shulk was, hammering away at some kind of math problem like it was his last moments on earth.

Which it very well could be. Simon looked up Machinus Poxxus or whatever the Machine Plague was called, and the results weren't pretty. It was exactly what Shulk said; transforms the body, destroys the soul, no cure.

But Simon wasn't worried about that. Despite the close quarters, he and Nia were damn careful around that infected girl; they dressed the wound and were careful not to let their improvised bandage come off, and if it was really contagious, then the whole city would be infected by now, so he probably would have caught it anyway.

No, he was just tired and cranky and really couldn't sleep a wink. He had tried to calm his nerves by watching some television, but just has he turned it on, an old man in a Hazmat suit with tan, wrinkled skin, bleached hair and a thick mustache came through the door. He was apparently a friend of Shulk's, because the sound of the TV was drowned out by a very long conversation about people he didn't know and things he didn't care about. He only started listening in when the conversation turned more to something he could relate to.

"[You really need to get some sleep, boy.]" said the old man. "[You're not gonna cure the Plague if ya have rocks in 'yer head.]"

"[I know, Dickson.]" said Shulk. "[And I'm not trying to. I'm just trying to get my affairs in order before-?"

"[Before what? You head off to the Mechonis by yerself? That's suicide, boy!]"

"[I'm not going by myself.]" said Shulk. "[Reyn and Dunban have already agreed..]"

Simon heard the sound of someone tearing a piece of paper off a wall. "[Graphs... charts... you've even got a bloody map of the damn thing!]" said Dickson. "[Where'd you get all this, anyway?]"

"[Your study. I've committed nearly all your research to memory. It was the only way I could without the Association catching wind.]"

"[Heh. You always were a clever blighter.]" Simon imagined that Dickson said this with a smirk on his face. "[But they're not going to stand for it, you know. You're the only one who can reliably operate The Monado. The Clock Tower wants to give you a Sealing Designation to keep you out of Atlas, Atlas wants you locked up with the damn sword to keep you away from the Tower, and the only reasons you get to roam free is that you're too bloody useful to both of 'em. And they're at each others throats too much to realize they both just want ya to say in one place. Hearing that you've flown the coop might make them consider working together 'fer once.]"

"[Even more of a reason to go right away.]" said Shulk. "[Whether or not I'm infected, the mere chance that I am can be used to my advantage. Besides, there's still a chance that Fiora-]"

"[Fiora's dead, Shulk. Get that through yer head already.]" said Dickson. "[This is the first time we've heard of a Mechon using the Machine Plague for anything. For all we know the attack on Okinawa was just some loony who reprogrammed a horde of Mechon for kicks and stuck a virus in there for good measure.]"

"[But they've abducted victims in all the other attacks!]" said Shulk. "[Maybe... they synthesize the virus as part of their digestive system. Maybe they've got a clockwork army just waiting to-]"

"[Say you're right then.]" Dickson interrupted. "[Say you're right and the Mechon abduct people and turn them into robots for God knows what reason. If so then she's worse than dead; just a soulless shell that once used to be the sweetest girl you ever knew.]"

"[But what if she's not]?" there was a sound of someone hastily pulling something down from a wall. "[Look, right here! Fenette's soul capacity is at 94 percent, well within average! But all accounts she's late enough into the transformation that she should be a 63 percent at best.]"

"[So she's an exception. Big deal. This word's fulla freaks like her.]"

"[But the point is that it's possible! Unlikely, yes, but possible. And I'd rather die out there fighting for a hopeless cause than in here, watching my humanity slip away.]"

"[Assuming you're infected, o' course. But if yer dead set on dyin, I won't stop ya. Just so you realize I can't officially help you in any way... though if I just happenedto be on assignment and I just happened to be there, and I just happenedto have some extra supplies...]"

"[That's more than I could ask.]" said Shulk. "[Thanks, Dickson.]"

"[My pleasure. Just promise me you'll get some sleep. Never a good idea to plan things without some shuteye.]"

"[Yes, that is probably a good idea. Good night, Dickson.]"

"[G'night Shulk.]"

A few minutes after Dickson left, Shulk made good on his promise. After shuffling his papers one last time, he turned of the lights, and crawled into bed.

Relieved to finally have some peace and quiet, Simon slowly closed his eyelids...

* * *

Amazingly Powerful Girlborg, better known to her friends as Shirley Fenette, couldn't sleep.

It was bad enough that she embarrassed herself on her first day as a superhero, but the thought that just by surviving she might have accidently doomed her friends to a slow, painful death was just too much to bare. She agonized over trying to recall each and every time she sneezed, but only succeeded in falling deeper and deeper into a never-ending panic spiral.

Even trying to take her mind off things by browsing the internet on her cell phone didn't help, as the slightest stray thought flooded her mind with information confirming her worst fears; failures to cure the Machine Plague, studies on the symptoms of the Machine Plague, studies showing how far the virus could spread via "carriers", philosophical debates about consciousness without a soul-

She threw her phone against the wall, forgetting for a moment exactly how strong her robotic body was. Her fancy iPhone shattered into a million pieces, fragments of the screen and hard drive clattering to the ground with a dull tinkle. She instantly regretted her mistake, and added it to the list of other regrets regretted.

Just then, there was a knock on the door. An green haired nurse in hazmat gear peeked her head into the room and said; "Excuse me, miss Girlborg? You have visitors. Friends of yours, I believe..."

"Friends?"Shirley felt a sinking feeling deep within the pit of her stomach in her stomach. "Oh no... not now..."

Before she could protest, a curvaceous young woman with thick, platinum blonde hair barged into the room wearing a form-fitting Ashford Academy uniform, carrying a burlap sack. Shirley immediately recognized her as Milly Ashford, the student council president. She was shortly followed by Rivalz Cardemonde, a purple-haired youth who was the council secretary, Nina Einstein, a nervous, mousy-looking girl with dark green hair and thin glasses who nevertheless somehow managed to be elected. Following them was Lelouch Lamperogue, a thin young man with raven hair purple eyes pointed features, who was the council's vice president and Shirley's crush as far back as she could remember. He was accompanied by his sister Nunnally Lamperogue, a blind girl with extremely long brown hair who was in a wheelchair that was being wheeled in by their brother Rolo Lamperogue, a short boy with brown hair and a very childlike face.

"Shirley!" Milly said, her face beaming with a wide grid. "Thank god you're alive!"

"You have no idea how worried we were!" said Rivalz.

"Guys...?" Shirley looked at them quizically. "What's going on?"

"The school's been sealed up tight for quarantine. Nobody's allowed in or out."

"But big brother managed to convince one of the officers to bring us here." said Nunnally. "And then he got a girl he once dated to let us in!"

"But... you're not wearing any protection." Shirley pointed out. "Does that mean..."

"The virus has been all over the news." said Nina. "The press doesn't have your name yet, but they're going to have to release it to aid quarantine efforts." Nina's knees trembled slightly. "A-and we've been around you longest." she continued. "I-If anyone is infected, it's probably us..."

Tears began to form in Shirley's eyes. "God... how could I be so stupid!" she cried. "I've probably killed all of you. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry..."

"No, I'm the one who should be sorry..." said Rivlz, tears dripping from his eyes. "I've been on paranormal websites for so long, I should have recognized this!" he then dropped down on his knees. "PLEASE FORGIVE ME!" he begged.

"And I shouldn't have pushed you so hard to become a superhero." Milly added, biting her lip as she did so.. "I guess I shouldn't have assumed you were caught up in some kind of origin story..."

Lelouch put his hand on Shirley's shoulder, and smiled ever so slightly. "We've all made mistakes. Even I was a bit too caught up giving lectures to think things through. Don't worry about it."

"And Kallen?"

"We can't reach her." said Rolo. "I've been trying for hours, but all I've gotten so far was her answering machine. It doesn't bode well..."

"Oh, but you know Kallen!" Milly said, trying dismissing Rolo's worries. "She's always disappearing off the face of the earth for one reason or another. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she was in the same hospital from another one of her fainting spells!" She reached into the sack she was carrying, and pulled out a colorful, cardboard box. "Now, if we're going to die or lose our souls or whatever, we might as we go out with a smile! Who's up for Apples to Apples?"

Lelouch flinched slightly as felt his phone vibrate. He glanced at the message briefly, and then said. "Sounds great! But first I need to take this call. I'll be back in a sec."

"Allight, if you say so." Milly said without even looking up from the game she was in the middle of setting up. "Now, I'll be the judge for the first round, and the first adjective is... 'excellent'. Now does everyone have their cards?"

For probably the first time that evening, Shirley Fennete cracked a smile.

Shirley Fennete was not alone.

* * *

Shinji Ikari was alone.

Not for the first time in his life, mind you, and certainly not the last. It's just that when it came time to choose hospital rooms there was only one single-room left, and of course the Prime Minister's son got preferential treatment.

His dad stayed as long as he could, trying to reassure Shinji through the thick plastic of his hazmat suit that everything would be alright. But Shinji almost wished that the Plague would come and consume his soul. Then, perhaps, he wouldn't feel so lonely.

He knew he was lucky to have such doting parents. After his mother died, his father took months off of work to help Shinji get over the loss. But no matter how many trips they went on, Shinji felt more isolated than ever. His father's position made it hard for people to see him as something other than "The Prime Minister's Son", and even if they weren't intimidated by such a title most kids his age were probably scared off by the guards that followed him everywhere. After Gendo, Lightning was probably the person he knew the best, and even then that's because the pink-haired officer was obviously cast from a different mold than the dime-a-dozen suits that made up the rest of his father's security team. It's not like they talked or anything; all Shinji knew about her was that she was sometimes there during big public events, and that she was quite attractive.

So imagine his surprise when a nurse called to let him know a visitor here to see him. At first he thought it was his dad coming back from work, but instead through the door stepped a middle aged man with messy blonde hair that never seemed to stay down properly. He was wearing a pair of thick, horn-rimmed glasses underneath his hazmat suit, and carried a clipboard and several pens underneath his shoulder.

"Shinji Ikari?" he said.

"Yes..." Shinji said before sinking into his sheets.

"My name is Dr. Calvin Summers, and I'm your new psychologist." He pulled up a chair, and sat next to Shinji's bed. "But please, call me 'Cal'."

"...okay." Shinji barely replied.

"So, Shinji, your father tells me you have superpowers. Is that correct?"

Shinji said nothing.

"...no need to be shy, Shinji. I do this for a living." he handed the young man a white business business card with the name "Dr. Calvin M. Summers, Superhero Psychologist" printed on it in a red, retro-futuristic font. "That's 'psychologist who treats superheroes' he added. Not "Psychologist who is also a superhero. Very different."

Shinji still said nothing.

"Of course it's okay if you're not a superhero." said the doctor. "Most metahumans aren't. Little known fact, but over sixty percent of all metas are lifelong civilians. The heroes and villains are just the ones who get the most attention." he smiled. "And as I said, I've been doing this for a while. You wouldn't believe the stories I've got."

Shinji continued to remain quiet.

"Did you ever hear about Dorothy Spinner, for instance? Very interesting girl. Had the power to bring her imaginary friends to life, which was a bit of a problem given her active imagination and made even worse given how she had a physical deformity that led her to isolate herself from others, leading to self-image and self-control issues. After her stint on the Doom Patrol ended in disaster, she sought me out and I took on her case pro-bono and through therapy she gradually learned to keep her powers reigned in to a certain extent. You'd barely even recognize her nowadays."

...Still nothing. Not even a smidgen of interest. Dr. Summers worried that the kid might have gone comatose without him realizing.

"You know what? How about I just skip storytime altogether and we could just sit here, staring at each other in silence until you think of something to talk about. Your choice."

A few more minutes passed without much. Finally, Shinji rolled onto his side and said. "...what's it like being a superhero?"

"A superhero? Hmm..." the doctor bit his pencil nervously. "From what I've heard, it's not easy. You're constantly in danger, always watching your back, ready to dart into the nearest phone booth at the slightest sign of trouble." he then pointed his pencil at Shinji. "Plus your mere existence endangers your friends and family, especially if you don't have a secret identity."

"...are there any good things?"

the doctor scratched his head. "Well, assuming you're not looking for endorsement deals, it's apparently quite a thrill to nab a crook in the middle of his crime. Plus, you do meet a lot of interesting people..."

"How do they get started then?" asked Shinji. "Superheroes, I mean."

The doctor eyed Shinji suspiciously. "Why do you ask?"

"Just... curious, I guess..." Shinji sighed.

The doctor gave shinji a concerned look. "Shinji. I can't tell you what to do with your life, but if you decide to take up a cape you'd be putting yourself in danger. Now, I'm not going to tell your father, but if you're going to be taking up a cape it's probably best to let him know. Trust me, I've seen too many families torn apart by this sort of thing."

"...can't you do it?" said Shinji. "I mean, let him know that I'm thinking about it..."

Dr. Summers shook his head. "...I'm afraid not." he said. "This is something you have to do.." he handed Shinji a phone. "But don't worry, I'll be right beside you. And if your father truly loves you, then he'll be right there with you."

* * *

"...while the Third Child's awakening was unexpected, it does not change our plans in the slightest." The aged vocal cords of SELEE-01 spoke in an accusatory manner, as he always did. "However, the Third Child's possible infection may require us to hasten our timetable for Instrumentality. Number ten, have you identified the ultimate source?"

"No, I'm afraid not." said SELEE-10 "But rest assured, any rogue elements will be dealt with swiftly."

"See to it that it does." SELEE-01 paused to let his message sink in. "Number two, risk analysis.."

Gendo Ikari turned on his microphone. "The outward symptoms of Orthopoxvirus Machina usually last three weeks before soul deterioration begins. We believe that while success is possible, it is unlikely that the third child will develop enough control over his AT field to initiate Second Impact. Suggesting we turn our attention to the other children."

"You're too soft, Two." said SELEE-11. "We will look into the others, but the Third Child still has the most potential..."

"I quite agree." said SELEE-03. "I say we put him in a crucible and see what happens. If he crumbles under the pressure... well, it was clear that it was not meant to be."

"Sounds like a plan!" said SELEE-06.

"This is far too important to leave to chance, Three." said SELEE-05. "The more time we have the better."

"What? So you still have time to make your own bid for power?" said SELEE-12. "Don't act like we don't know who you've been associating with..."

"This is why I said we needed fewer members..." said SELEE-08

"Gentlemen, please." said SELEE-07 "We are not barbarians... well, most of us anyway."

"HEY!" said SELEE-06.

"We are looking out for humanity's best interest in the long term." SELEE-07 continued. "What we do outsidethese meeting halls is not the subject of our discussion."

"Seven is right." said SELEE-04. "I've seen too many of these gatherings fall apart because one of us loses focus. We should be talking about the Third Child."

"Thirteen." barked SELEE-01. "I notice you have nothing to say on the matter."

"...if I have opinions, I will tell you them." SELEE-13 replied.

SELEE-06 then spoke up. "Well enough of this blathering, I believe I have a plan that will change everything. All we need is the Emerald Eye of Ekron, a corkscrew, several tons of..."

Just then, Gendo's phone began to vibrate, and looking at it appeared that his son was trying to contact him. He turned volume down, so that the ongoing speech didn't get in the way.

"Uh, hey dad. It's me." Shinji gulped on the other end of the line. "Um... listen. This might sound kind of strange, but... well... I think I kinda want to be a superhero." Pause "Maybe not even 'kinda'. Like... I really want this. I dunno. I guess I just want to meet people... like myself?"

Gendo feigned surprise. Shinji had always seen the world in black and white, and given how he ran out of the limo yesterday to save complete strangers he knew that this day would come quite soon. For years, Gendo had been preparing the perfect speech to dissuade Shinji from heroic aspirations, carefully tailored to guarantee that he would never so much as look at a cape as long as he lived.

"Well, Shinji, that's quite a... a..."

But when he tried to start his often-rehearsed speech... he found the words just wouldn't come.

If only he had been a more heartless bastard. If only he had buried his emotions more thoroughly, perhaps then Yui might have a chance to...

But no. She wouldn't want that. He learned that first hand.

"Dad?"said Shinji. "Are you still there?"

"Sorry, line cut out." said Gendo. "As I was saying, that's quite a decision you've made. But it's your life and I respect your decision. In fact I'll support you every step of the way."

"...really?"

"Of course! After all, what kind of man would I be if I supported metahumans but didn't allow my own son to become a hero?" he chuckled. "Just think of the polls, for one thing."

Gendo heard a sigh of relief. "Thanks dad."said Shinji.

"No problem. And remember; if there's anything on your mind that you feel you need to talk about, just let me know."

"Okay dad. Good night."

"Good night, Shinji." he waited for the sound of Shinji hanging up, and then he put away his cell phone. He then turned the volume back up on his computer and skimmed through the transcript to see if he had missed anything. He apparently hadn't, as SELEE-06 was just finishing up the explanation of his plan.

"...and then if we have leftovers, we feed them to the wolves!" SELEE-06 concluded. "What do you think?"

"You, sir are an abomination!" cried SELEE-07.

"Thank you for reminding me why I had your kind of people put to death..." said SELEE-03 "Now does any of you have arealsuggestion, or should we call the meeting right here?".

Gendo turned on his microphone. "Gentlemen... I believe I have an idea..."

* * *

"You know, they'll get suspicious if you keep leaving like this." said the green haired nurse as she unzipped her hazmat suit.

"Let them." said Lelouch as he slipped his arms through the sleeves of a gaudy purple jacket. "At worst, they'll think I have a secret girlfriend I wasn't telling anyone about."

"Or boyfriend."

Lelouch rolled his eyes. "Yes, or boyfriend." C.C. may have been a loyal companion and an indispensable resource, but her dry wit was something Lelouch would never get used to. Still, he didn't know what he'd do without her; C.C., after all, was the one who first recognized when Shirley was infected with the Machine Plague. Not only that, but she was also the one who first proposed a theory why Shirley's strain of the virus was inert outside of her own body: She stated that the girl might have had a metagene that was awakened when she was infected by the plague. When activated, the gene granted her technopathic powers that subconsciously shut down any Machine Plague viruses outside her body. A quick check of what remained of Shirley's organic DNA coupled with the later manifestation of her powers revealed this to be the case.

Admittedly, it wasn't often that C.C. was so helpful. In fact, most of the time she didn't really offer to do anything unless Lelouch told her, which is why he suspected that she was hiding something. Though he'd be damned if he knew what it was.

Lelouch considered all this as he continued to tie on his thick, black cape. "I assume the preparations are all made?"

"The sleeper agent altered the security footage just as you instructed, and the Zeta Modulator is ready to receive."

"Good." Said Lelouch, putting on his iconic helmet. "Time is of the essence." He pressed a button on his cufflink, and in a flash or yellow light the famed mercenary known as Zero and his mysterious assistant, C.C., were now standing in the command center of Horai Island, the Headquarters of the Black Knights.

A massive domed room, the command center had a dozen-odd computer terminals with holographic interfaces, at which sat the men and women responsible for coordinating the low-priority missions that Zero couldn't oversee personally. At the moment, they seemed to be busy dealing with routine zombie outbreak somewhere in the American midwest.

It always astounded Lelouch how many supervillains thought creating zombies was a good idea. Disposable, endlessly-replicating minions were something that looked good on paper but had a few fundamental flaws, most notably their lack of intelligence.

Intending on relaying a few orders to try and finish things a bit more efficiently, he approached his private terminal, a large, dark-purple chair with red upholstery and a pair of ergonomic keyboards sticking out of its sides, when a simple-looking man with curly brown hair and a red bandanna approached him.

"Zero, thank god you're here!" the man said. "We've got a... situation in the medical bay. Kozuki just woke up, but... something weird happened to her." the man scratched his head. "Erm... you're going to have to see for yourself."

"I don't have long, Ohgi. " said Zero. He turned away from the Secretary General, and turned on his holographic display. "What is it?"

"Well... for starters her eyes have changed color."

"...What." Zero looked back at Ohgi.

"Yeah... and I don't mean like bloodshot. I mean her actual irises had changed from blue to red."

Lelouch turned off his display, and got out of his seat. "Did you check to make sure she wasn't a clone?"

"Her I.D. chip was still implanted in her arm. If she is a clone, whoever made her did a remarkably thorough job."

"Any change in genetics?"

"We tried to check, but when we did the equipment kind of exploded."

"What do you mean by.. 'kind of'?"

"I mean it completely exploded, sir."

"Brilliant..." Zero started towards the medical bay. "Thank you, Ohgi. That will be all."

* * *

Horai Island wasn't just a glorified Knightmare Frame hanger hooked up to some computers. It was also a training facility, a research lab, a defense platform, a neighborhood for tens of thousands of families, and perhaps most tellingly, a medical research center. While the tactical advantage of being able to patch people up more efficiently was obvious, less so was the potential for building countermeasures against biological weapons, as well as biological weapons themselves in case they ever became necessary. As a result, the doctors here were walking encyclopedias of obscure ailments and afflictions, natural or otherwise.

But in spite of this, the rooms of the Horai Island medical bay weren't all that different than the ones at Yokoda Memorial Hospital. They were a bit more well-guarded and there was only room for one bed, but the facility was as advanced as anything you could find in Tokyo. Or perhaps even more advanced, as there were rumors that the Knights had managed to acquire a quantity of supertech smuggled away from New Genesis.

Though given the array of tools that the German doctor attending to her had assembled, he looked more like he was from Apokolips. Knives, saws, syringes, an old Polaroid camera... and was that a crossbow? Kallen tried not to think what kind of procedure requires medieval weaponry.

She was doing a pretty good job at that, all things considered. Her head was throbbing, her throat was dry, and she felt sick all the way down to her stomach. She had been injured before, but this felt different, somehow. She didn't feel like she had any wounds, for one thing.

"Blood pressure, normal...? Hmm, very curious..." the medic was in the middle of writing something down on a clipboard just as Zero entered the door. "Ach, herr Zero! How good of you to make it!" He cheerfully tapped Zero's helmet with the clipboard, much to Zero's complete indifference.

"...I'm not in the mood for games, doctor." said Zero. "Have you figured out what's wrong with Kozuki?"

"No, I'm afraid not, but I do know what ISN'T wrong with zhe girl." He slapped the the clipboard into Zero's hand. "EVERYTHINK! Zhe entire mech vas totaled, and not a single scratch on her! Fascinating, isn't it?"

"...wait..." Kallen strained to speak. "...the Guren... what happened to it...?"

"Save your strength, Kozuki." said Zero. "We need you to make a quick recovery."

"Ach, zhat's another thing I was about to mention." the medic said. "After zhe DNA Analyzer went kerplooey, I vhas tryink to get a blood sample, vhen zhis happened!" he grabbed Kallen's arm, and pulled out a large, empty syringe.

"Wait, no! What are you doing!" Zero shouted.

"I know vhat I'm doing sir!" he called back to Zero. He then got close to Kallen's face and whispered "Now don't cry, dear frauline. Zhis von't hurt a bit..."

The doctor raised his Syringe into the air. Kallen, too weak to try and esacpe, closed her eyes in anticipation of a sharp stinging pain... but only felt a faint prick before hearing a snap that she was pretty sure didn't come from any of her bones.

"Zhee? Vhat did I tell you?" he held up a Syringe with a broken needle. "Didn't hurt a bit." He then laughed heartily as Kallen's heart continued to race. "You should see zhe look on your face, frauline. Ooh boy..." he took a picture of Kallen with the Polaroid "Zhats vun's going in zhe journal..."

"Doctor..." Zero's voice descended to a low growl. "...need I remind what I said would happen if you didn't improve your bedside manners..."

The medic's laugh turned from a guffaw into a nervous chuckle. "Eh-he... yes, vell." He pulled out another sheet of paper. "Besides zhe DNA test everythink else said she vas completely human. So I did some more exoitic tests. Vhile she vas stillI sleepink, I tried exposink her to eveything I could think of. Lead, gold, garlic, sunlight, a solar lamp, a red sun lamp, krypton, kryptonite, lemons, her own name said backwards, chocos, EMPs, iron, sounds beyond zhe edge of hearink, chlorophyll, energy drinks, ice, fire, electricity, zhe lemons again..."

"Where did you get Kryptonite?" said Zero.

"ZHAT IS NOT IMPORTANT!" said the medic. "Anyvey, I vas just about to give up, vhen I decide to see how she vould react to silver..." he reached into his bag and pulled out a big silver cross decorated with a tiny effigy of christ. "...so I got zis old heirloom zhat my grandmother gave to me. She was a big religious kook you see, and whenever I got in trouble she always used to..."

Kallen's head began to throb, as her stomach tied itself into knots. "What the hell is going on...?" she cried wordlessly. To her ears, each of the medic's words were completely indecipherable, each syllable sounding more akin to nails on a chalkboard than human speech.

"...ha ha, I remember vonce I vas finding leeches in my bed for weeks. But enough about my tragic childhood. As I said I was lucky enough to get a very stronk reaction from zhe patient. I just held it up to her like zhis and..."

As the cross was held up next to Kallen's face, the pounding intensified to the point that she swore her own brain was going to break out of her skull. Enraged, she grabbed the crucifix and hurled it right past Zero's head, screaming "GET THAT THING AWAY FROM ME!".

Only afterward this did the pain begin to subside, but she felt a stinging sensation in the palm of her hand.

Even more shocking was where the crucifix ended up: it went straight through the wall on the other side of the room and embedded itself in the wall separating the next room over.

The steel platedwall separating the next room over.

Zero looked through the hole in the wall, grateful that his mask hid just how pants-shittingly terrified he was just a moment ago. "...Doctor. You said you knew a wizard, right?"

"Vell, yes..." said the medic. "Technically he's a 'magician' but-"

"Call him. Now."

"...I'm not sure zhat would be a good idea. He is infamously terrible to verk vith, and I don't think he-."

"NOW."

"Okay, okay. I'm goink, I'm goink..."

Kallen, meanwhile, was less frightened and more confused. She looked at her burnt, scarred hand.

"...What happened to me?"

* * *

"[...so Dr. Insano was like all "Now that I have the horcrux, I will use it to cause meltdown! And then, the TRI-STATE AREA will be mine and stuff!"

And then Batman was like "No you madman! You're completely insane! And you'll never get away with this!"

But Doctor Insano did this totally creepy laugh, that sounded like "HeheHEHEhNYAnanAnAnHaha! Oh we'll see about that, bat-brain! We'll see about that when my big atomic chainsaw puncher robot murders you!

And then I made my big entrance by riding on a robot pterodactyl with laser eyes and I was all like "NOT SO FAST DOCTOR INSANO!"

and he screamed like "What?! Atomic kitten?! Noooooooo! This is impoosssibbllleeeee!" ]"

"[Atomic Kitten?]" Detective Keiichi Ikari, a middle aged man with a worn, ragged face, looked up from his notepad. "[...I'm sorry, Hope... who is that again?]"

"[That's me!]" Hope said. "[It's like, my superhero name. I gotta have a cool one if I want to impress Wild Tiger. I mean I don't really have a costume yet, but...]"

The detective jotted some notes on his paper. "Extroverted. Possibly a compulsive liar. Check for records on 'Atomic Kitten'. Also possibly 'Dr. Insano'."

"[Okay, so let's back up a bit.]" the detective pointed his pen at the girl. "[This... "Wild Tiger" person. What's so important about impressing him?]"

"[Because I'm going to be his sidekick!]"

"Possibly delusional." He wrote. "[What makes you think he'll consider taking sidekick? Have you talked to him? Perhaps made a arrangements of some sort?]"

"[Well I sent him a letter a few weeks ago, so he's probably marked the date on his calendar and everything.]" She began to swing her legs in an impatient manner. ["And how could he nottake me? My powers are just so awesome he's just gonna flip!]"

Keiichi raised an eyebrow. "[...powers?]" He corrected his pad to read "VeryPossibly Delusional."

"[Yeah! I've got, like, seven of em. Well, eight, technically, but the last one's kinda boring...]"

The detective nodded. "[And those powers are...?]"

"[I'm gettin to em, gramps! You just gotta let me finish my story! Now let's see... I talked about the dinosaur island, the laser squid...]" Hope began to count on her fingers as she tried to remember how far along she was with her story. "[OH YEAH! My entrance! So Insano was like "NOOO IMPOSSIBLE" and I was like "nuh-uh!" so I sliced his robot to ribbons with my claws!]"

"[Claws?]"

"[Yeah, see...]" She held up her hands, and a spark of electricity seemed to arc over them her fingertips they sharpened into needle-like points. "[These babies can cut through just about anything!]"

"[Uh-huh.]" He wasn't too surprised at this point that the girl actually had powers. He'd been a detective in one place or another for over twenty years, and has seen far, far stranger in his time. "[I don't need a demonstration.]" he said, sketching the words "Warning: Armed" into the notepad. "[So what happened next?]"

Hope put away her claws. [Well... then he shot lasers everywhere but they kind of missed, and Batman threw batarangs at the laser and it exploded and I beat up in his minions and said "YOU WONT GET AWAY WITH THIS" and he was like "OH YES I WILL". And then he pulled a lever that turned all the lights off.]" the girl put her hand over her left eye, and leaned forward. "[But you see he didn't know that I could see in the dark, so I kicked him in that place you're not supposed to kick boys.]"

"Night vision?" the detective wrote. "[And was that it?]"

"[Nope!]" said Hope, "[Because he had a TRUE FORM like some kinda video game boss. He drank this potion and then he was all big and green and he blew up the room and tore up all his clothes except his purple shorts. Batman tried to fight him but the potion made him a better fighter so Batman was like "OH NO I CAN'T BEAT THIS GUY!" And then Insano punched my head into a wall and it EXPLODED LIKE A VOLCANO!]" She spread her arms out wide to emphisize this last point.

"[Your head or the wall?]"

"[BOTH!]" shouted Hope.

"[...that must have been painful.]" the detective nodded gently. "[I guess regeneration is another one of your powers?]"

"[Yep!]" Hope grinned smugly as the detective recorded this factoid. "[So after I got better, I was like "Hey batman I have a plan!" and grabbed a science bucket. "I'm gonna turn to water so you can trick him into drinking me." and batman said "GOOD PLAN" and wrote the word "juice bucket" on with a permanent bat-marker.]"

"You can turn into water?"

"[Juuust a little bit. Like a puddle or something.]" Hope replied "[I mean I can't really move around much, but it hurts a lot less than having to regenerate.]"

"I'll bet..." he wrote the words "Keep Away From Water Supply" in his journal.

"[So I clawed my way out of Insano's stomach and he bled a lot but then got better because he'd been taking steroids! And then he tried to bite my head off, but I did this!]" She stuck out her arm as another wave of arcing electricity passed over it, changing the skin into what appeared to be carbon fiber. "I mean, I couldn't move it or anything..." she awkwardly waved her stiffened arm around. "[But it makes a good shield! So good in fact that all his teeth fell out. He had some robot teeth just in case, but he forgot where he put them so he turned the lights back on. He couldn't find me, though, because I was hiding in his shadow!]" She stuck her hand through the Detective's own shadow to demonstrate. "[And then I punched him and he fell over and died.]"

"Role: Infiltration? These powers can't be a coincidence..."

"[And then batman said "Good Job, Atomic Kitten. You just stopped a nasty bad guy." and I was like "no probs, Batman!" and then the mayor gave us ice cream! The end!]."

"[...I still don't see how you ended up in Tokyo.]"

"[Oh, uh...]" The girl flinched. "[It was teleporting ice cream! Dr. Insano had it booby-trapped!]"

"Ah, that explains it..." the detective reached into his back pocket and pulled out a blue lollipop. "Thank you hope. I need to get home now, so please be a good girl and wait right here, okay?"

"[Okayyyyy!]" Hope grinned as she stuck the lollipop between a gap in her teeth. "[Oh, can you find a green one next time? They're my favorite!]"

"[I'll see what I can do.]" Detective Ikari wore his best fake smile as he left the room, only to immediately drop it as he bumped into his partner, detective Mitsuhiro Maniwa, a chipper young man who naivete nevertheless obscured surprising flashes of brilliance. A clear plastic cup bounced to the floor.

"Seriously...?" Keiichi sighed. "Eavesdropping?"

"What?" the partner said incredulously. "It was a good story! Plus, I lost my keys again..."

Keiichi sighed. "All that manga you read must be rotting your brain." he slammed the door shut. "That's no kid, that's probably a deep-cover assassin manufactured by some nameless criminal syndicate."

Maniwa frowned as they headed towards the observation room. "...You sure?"

Through the other side of the two-way mirror, Keiichi looked at the kid. "No. But what else could a nigh-unkillable kid with powers suspiciously suited to stealth, espionage and murder be?" the detective and his partner sat down and continued to watch through the mirror as Hope impatiently squirmed in her chair, bending over the chair's to stretch and then falling over with a loud thud. "Plus, she didn't mention anything about her parents, family, or any kind of home life, and doesn't speak a lick of Japanese to boot. She's got something to hide no matter what way you slice it..."

Maniwa gave his partner a strange look. "So... you think she's here to kill someone?"

"That's the annoying part." the Detective rubbed his forehead. "If she was, there's no way she'd show her hand like this. Ken tells me she even changed her hair color once because 'she felt like it'."

"So... It looks like there's a few possibilities here." said Detective Maniwa. He sketched out a Punnett square on his notepad. "She's either a killer or she's innocent, and her personality is either genuine or fabricated..."

"Don't bother with the chart, Maniwa. We don't have enough evidence to make that kind of judgement call just yet."

Maniwa hastily scribbled out his notes. "So what are we going to do?"

"Lock her up in the holding cell for the night and stay up late searching through missing persons reports. Unless you've got a better idea?"

Maniwa grinned sheepishly. "...I guess I don't."

"Well at least you're honest." Maniwa's partner patted him on the back. "Come on, I'm hungry. Let's get something to eat."

-END OF CHAPTER-

BETHANY SNOW: ...and welcome back to Chanel 52 News. Our top story tonight, children across the world continue to disappear. Our field agent, A. Bug, has collected expert opinion on this matter. Let's hear what they have to say.

RANDOM HILLBILLY: It's them dang gum weasels I keeps tellin' the papers about, but no one dun' believe me! The god damn weasels with their beady red eyes and white fur, whisperin in my daughter's ear sayin she can be a princess in a castle or somethin. But don't believe em'! Weasels is nuthin but liars, cheats and politicians!

THE QUESTION: Now I'm not saying it's aliens... but it's aliens.

DR THIRTEEN: Oh please, don't tell me you believe that nonsense. This is clearly the cause of something more grounded in reality, like Gorilla Grodd kidnapping children for an imagination-powered devolution machine that he'll use to turn everyone to gorillas. You know, something logical.

KYOKO SAKURA: How the hell should I know? Do I look like a kidnapper to you?

AMBUSH BUG: And there you have it! It seems all the so-called "experts" are just as clueless about this as I am about everything else!

CALENDER MAN: In other news, it's supernatural awareness week. To celebrate, Metropolis University is holding it's 66th annual "Mahocon", where occult enthusiasts from across the globe gather to exchange potions, arcane secrets, and compare pointy hats. Most intriguing was the "Stump the League" panel, where anyone can ask questions to the team know as "Justice League Dark", including the famed magician Negi Springfield, the actual Frankenstein's Monster, and the detective L (who is communicating via audio only).

RANDOM DUDE: Constantine, is Hogwarts a real place?

JOHN CONSTANTINE: No. Next question.

OTHER RANDOM DUDE: Is L really an A.I.?

L: Sure, let's go with that.

THIRD RANDOM DUDE: What is love? Baby don't hurt me. Don't hurt me. No more.

NEGI SPRINGFIELD: That's not a question...

FRANKENSTEIN: Can we please stay on topic here?

BETHANY SNOW: And finally, here's Dr. W, our foreign correspondent, where apparently Super Young Team has once again saved Tokyo from the threat of the Ten Ben Matanga. We now take you live, to the scene of the battle.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Thank you, Snow. I'm here with Most Excellent Superbat, leader of Super Young Team, where we're apparently riding in a car made of solid gold, as impossible as that might sound.

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: Nothing's impossible when you have money!

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Very true. So, mister Bat, how much trouble did you have with the Ten Ben Matanga?

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: They might have fancy suits and a catchy theme song, but they don't have the heart, determination, or brand loyalty of Super Young Team!

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Yes, well. That is a point. Anyway, I've heard that despite your rumored crush on, erm *looks at note written on hand* "Shy Crazy Lolita Canary" (really, is that what she's actually called?) it turns out that in fact she is actually dating the so-called "Batman of Japan". Any comment?

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: Ah, well I wouldn't know about that. I don't make a habit of prying into my teammates social lives after all. AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAH AH HA HA HA HA HA

THE 11TH DOCTOR: ha ha ha ha ha ha ha..

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

THE 11TH DOCTOR: ha... ha ha ha, ha...

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: AH HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

THE 11TH DOCTOR: …

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: HA HA... HA.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: …

MOST EXCELLENT SUPERBAT: ...is that camera still running?

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTES:

The "New 52" Reboot doesn't fully apply to this work. While something similar to Flashpoint did happen, the changes it brought weren't quite as dramatic as in the reboot. But instead of yakking on about how stupid DC Comics' managers are, I'll instead talk about some background material. Specifically, the Justice League of the setting.

Astro Boy is probably the first Anime character to join the League on a semi-permanent basis. He's like Plastic Man; heavily associated with the League despite despite not being one of the "Core Members".

Speed Racer was another character who had been on and off the league, though given that his "power" was that he had a slightly less fancy Batmobile his tenure didn't last long before writers ran out of ideas. He most recently joined the team in 2008 to promote the movie, and though he eventually dropped out of active duty he and his family remain supporting characters frequently seen on the Watchtower.

Lupin III is considered an "Honorary member" given the number of times he's helped the team all the way back through the late 70's, where he was able to steal a weapon later used to stop an invasion from the planet Spectra.

The 70's were also a time where we got a rotating series of Gundam pilots, including (but not limited to) Amuro Ray, Kamille Bidan, Judau Ashta, Domon Kasshu, Loran Cehack, Setsuna F. Seiei, and Flit Asuno. Most of them are dead now or have been put out of commission due to their Gundams being completely destroyed, and they've rarely lasted more than a few years or so thanks to what fans have called "The Gundam Curse" (which was later retconned to be an actual curse during Morrison's run because of course he'd do something like that). Domon's the one who's probably lasted the longest, flat out refusing to die even no matter how many times he's been blown up, and has become a Green Lantern at least twice.

Devilman joined the team in the 90's during the "Detroit Era", deep within the dark ages of comic books where people craved the kind of violence depicted in the Devilman manga. As in our world, the "Detroit Era" was still terrible, though Grant Morrison's run managed to redeem Devilman and secure himself a place in the Justice League mythos.


	3. Chapter 3

[FRONT COVER: A groupshot of the team at some kind of formal event sponsored by Prime Minister Gendo Ikari, with Simon, Lightning, and Shulk in the back row, with Shirley and Shinji in the front. Dr. Summers can be seen in the crowd. Simon is gladly shaking a smiling Gendo's hand, while everyone else is trying to look professional. In the foreground Hope is leaping in front of the camera holding a sign that says "NOT A DREAM! NOT AN IMAGINARY STORY! While a banner in the background reads "THE BEGINNING OF AN ERA" in big fancy letters.]

* * *

"I've got good news, and I've got better news."

The manager of the hospital looked at those assembled in the meeting hall. Simon, Lightning, Shulk, Shinji, Girlborg, Nia and Dickson were all doing their best to look professional, despite few of them being any good at it. There were also over a half-dozen students from Ashford Academy who were all apparently Gilrborg's close personal friends, who were apparently there for moral support. They were attempting to hide their identities by wearing domino masks that the purple-haired boy had brought with him for this exact purpose. One of them had even repaired Girlborg's arm, something that the rest of the staff had spent hours puzzling over, though the speed of the job was obvious given how a massive seam was still visible.

The manager took a deep breath. "The good news is that, after running some blood tests, we've determined that miss "Girlborg" is the only one infected with the Machine Plague." He shuffled around some papers. "Furthermore, we discovered that all samples of the plague outside of Girlborg's body have gone inert. We hypothesized that this is because the Machine Plague itself is a technological entity, and that Girlborg has subconsciously disabled the virus samples with her technopathic abilities. This was proven correct when we brought in an outside sample for comparison, which we found to be disabled when brought within approximately ten meters of the subject."

"Uh, that's great doc." Simon grinned awkwardly. "But I got a 'D-' in biology. Can you say that without the technobabble?"

"Well basicly he said that the virus isn't in our systems." answered Nia. "And even if it was, it's not going to spread because of Girlborg's powers!"

"So... we can leave?" Shinji's eyes picked up.

"Yep. Yer all free to go." said Dickson.

Shirley breathed a blissful sigh of relief, her antennas drooping in response. "Thank god..." she whispered. "I don't think I could live with causing a pandemic..."

"Well. Glad that's over." Lightning got up from her seat. "Now if you excuse me, I have paperwork to catch up on..."

"I wouldn't leave quite yet." said Shulk. "He still has something to tell us."

"Ah, yes, that." The manager began to scan his papers. "Erm... the 'better news' is..."

"...that you are now cordially invited to join Japan's newest super-team." Prime Minister Gendo Ikari, pushed open the doorway, and casually strolled into the room.

"Dad?!" exclaimed Shinji.  
"Hello, son." Gendo smiled. "I assume you had a good meeting with Doctor Summers?"

"...yes." Shinji squeaked.

"Good to hear it. You'll be seeing a lot more of him, too, given how I've asked him to be the Society's personal psychologist..." he then snapped his gloved fingers. "Ah, but I'm getting ahead of myself!"

The hospital manager got from his seat, and offered it to the Prime Minister.

"Thank you, Dr. Woodward." said Gendo. "That will be all."

The hospital manager politely excused himself from the room.

"Now. As I was saying..." he picked up a small remote control, and turned off the lights. A projector hidden in the ceiling then turned itself on, and started to display a old black-and-white film.

"Imagine if you will, the late 1940's; the end of World War II, and the dawn of the age of superheroes..." images flashed by of heroic feats performed by heroes of the era, such as Alan Scott, the original Green Lantern, phasing through a wall as part of a demonstration, or Jay Garrick, the first Flash, effortlessly demonstrating that he could find a needle in a haystack in blink of an eye. "All over the world, people with super-human powers were starting to emerge... and even some who lacked powers were inspired to take justice into their own hands."

"Chief among them was the Justice Society of America, the world's first superhero team." He then began to play footage of the Justice Society brutalizing Japanese soldiers.

Lightning recognized these scenes as being from old propaganda films, and regarded them indifferently. Shirley, however, squirmed in her seat, as she was more used to hearing about the JSA in a more positive light.

"Formed in World War II, these men played a key role in allied victory, forever changing the face of organized warfare." Gendo continued. Some stock footage of riots in post-war Japan began playing. "As you may recall from history class, American occupation of our fair country was a turbulent time. Sudden democratization, censorship, poverty, food shortages, alien invasions... the people back then had every reason to be afraid."

The stock footage was of the Diet discussing something. "In order to skirt around the ban on having an armed military, in 1948 the Diet approved funding for the creation of a 'Justice Society of Japan', a Japanese counterpart to the American team, pouring billions into the creation of a government-sponsored crime-fighting team that could be deployed in the event of war."

"While it was technically legal, the United States stopped the plan cold, citing fears that our country was preparing for World War III. The funding, however, was never withdrawn and remains frozen in our coffers to this day." Gendo turned off the screen, and turned the lights back on. "But now that even the Cold War has passed us by, I feel that now is the perfect time for the Justice Society of Japan to come into being, and I would like to invite you fine people as it's first members."

Simon raised his hand. "Uh, yeah. I got a question." he said. "What if we don't particularly want to work for the government?"

"The Diet was very careful about how they worded things." said Gendo. "The group is only to receive funding from the government; the idea that they could be used in warfare was an assumption made on the basis that they would willingly volunteer to protect their country's citizens. You won't need to report to me or anyone else if you so choose, though I would recommend that you work closely with the Tokyo police force."

"What about nepotism?" said Shinji. "I mean, won't people be kinda suspicious given that I'm your son and all..."

"That's what secret identities are for." Gendo said. "But I'm willing to take the risk. And if it comes to it I'll even step down from office."

"Can we join?!" shouted Rivalz. "I mean, we're not superheroes, but every team needs guys on the sidelines!"

Gendo rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "...that's something you should ask the chairman, but I don't see a problem with it." he pointed back at the group. "Speaking of which, your first order of business should be to pick a chairman."

"A what?" said Simon.

"An elected leader, usually acting as spokesman of the group." said Lelouch. "This is not something to take lightly. Bad PR can make or break a group like this."

"Oh. That's easy, then." said Simon. "We'll just pick Shulk."

"M-me?" sputtered Shulk.

"Yeah." said Simon "You seem like a smart guy, and everyone knows that an English accent makes you sound smart..."

"Yes, well..." Shulk took a moment to collect himself. "...I'm not even sure I'm going to agree to this. After all, I still work with Atlas, and I've overstayed my welcome as it is..."

"The Mechonis ain't goin' anywhere, kid." said Dickson. "Better you spend months preparing for a formal expedition alongside supermen than just head off to fight an army of robots on yer own." he rapped the Monado with his fist. "I mean you've had the bloody thing for what, a month? It takes time to get good at usin' something like this. 'sides, the minister got one of those special contracts that says we gotta send one of our mates over, and honestly you'd probably be my top pick."

"Uh... thanks." said Shulk. "...but even so, I'm going to have to decline being chairman. After all, this is supposed to be the Justice Society of Japan, and nearly half the team is foreign. I just think it would send some unfortunate implications..."

Simon crossed his arms. "...okay, how about Lightning? She's a capable, no-nonsense kind of personal."

"Normally I'd agree with you... but I'm also going to have to pass." she said. "Let's just say I don't have a very good reputation right now and leave it at that."

"Ooookayyyy..." simon looked around the room. "Then that just leaves... Shinji?"

"Blagaghggarragblargblarrrargblarh!" Shinji stammered. "...I mean, I kinda have stage fright..."

Simon looked down at the core-drill, and wondered; "What would bro do at a time like this?"

The answer, of course, was obvious: First shout "ALL RIGHT THEN!", leap onto the table, strike a heroic pose, and say "From this day forward we no longer stand alone! From now on, WE are the avengers who right all wrongs! WE are the beacon of light in a sea of darkness! WE ARE JUSTICE SOCIETY OF JAPAN, AND WE'RE GONNA SAVE THE WHOLE GODDAMN WORLD!"

Those assembled reacted to Simon's antics with what ranged from stunned silence to mild bemusement.

"Yay, Simon!" Nia said. "That has to be your best speech yet!"

"If that's the case, I don't want to hear his worst." Lightning sighed. "Seriously, can you tone down the antics a little?"

"No, keep it!" said Milly. "The public eats up that kind of hammy, over-dramatic stuff! I mean, do you have any idea how much money Most Excellent Superbat pays his people to write speeches like that? Not to mention the entire tokusatsu genre would cease to exist if it boisterousness wasn't marketable..."

"'Marketable'?" Lightning shot Milly a stern look. "We're not a reality TV show, and we're not Super Young Team."

"Well, as the Justice Society's publicist I feel that I ought to set some-"

"You're our publicist now? We met you all of ten minutes ago; what makes you think that we trust you enough to manage our reputation?"

"Look; Shirley can vouch for me that I'm more than qualified to..."

The rest of the conversation faded into the background as Shirley, hands in her head, tried to wrap her mind around what was going on. "[This is all happening too fast...]"she thought. "[First powers, then I nearly die, and now they want me on a superteam? I can't do this, I just can't!]"she looked at the rest of the student council, trying not to cry. "[Milly... Rivlaz... Nana... Loulou... I'm sorry I let you guys down. I know it meant so much to you...]"

Shirley stood up in order to speak, and the whole table went silent.  
"I... I..." she began to say, but found that the words just wouldn't leave her lips.

"What's wrong?" Shirley turned her head to see Lelouch staring right back at her with a concerned face. "Is something the matter?"

"N-no! Nothing! N-not at all." And just as hard as it was to speak just a few moments ago, she now the words flowing from her mouth at the mere sight of Lelouch. "InfactIjustwantedtosaythatIthinkImightbeagoodvice chairman!" She slapped her mouth shut as soon as she realized what she had said the exact opposite of what she had originally intended.

Milly and Lightning looked at each other, and then back at Shirley. "What makes you think that?" said Lightning.

Shirley tried to correct herself by saying. "Um, I'm sorry, I just misspoke..." but instead it came out as. "Well I'm in the student council so I have experience not as a vice president or anything but I might be running for that next year and I being vice chairman could be like leading the next generation or something I'm sorry if this sound stupid I'll be quiet now."

Another round of silence ensued.

"Actually, that's not a bad idea at all!" said Milly. "A plucky everygirl in a leadership role would be a good thing, perhaps silencing any fears that Simon's testosterone-filled attitude will be a bad influence to children."

"W-what, me? Plucky?" Shirley jumped back in her seat, and her antenna suddenly went rigid in fright. "No no no, you've got to be thinking of someone else..."

"On the contrary, you're one of the bravest people I know." Shirley turned to her side and found, to her great surprise that Lelouch was the one now vouching for her. "On the first day on the job, you put your own life in danger trying to protect Avalon, and even after you got your arm torn off got back up in order to save someone's life."

"He's right! I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you rescuing me!" said Nia.

"And neither would I." agreed Shulk. "And you were out of your element too, which I found really impressive. I second the nomination!"

Milly began to grinned ear-to-ear. "All in favor of Amazingly Powerful Girlborg as our vice-chairman, say "aye"!"

"Aye!" said Rivalz.

"Aye!" said Nia.

"Hold on, do those two even get a vote?" said Lightning. "Technically they're not even members..."

"I'm chairman and I say they do!" said Simon. "Aye!"

"Aye!" said Nunally.

"Aye!" said Rolo.

"A-aye..." stammered Nina.

Lightning shrugged. "Well, we could certainly do worse. Aye."

Shinji looked around the room. He and Lelouch were the only ones without their hands raised. "Well, might as well give into peer pressure... aye."

Shirley was about to protest, but then Lelouch's hand shot up to silence her. "Aye!"

"Well then it's settled!" Gendo clapped his hands together. "A unanimous vote for the Vice-Chairman. Another stunning example of democracy at work."

"Heh heh... thanks..." Shirley laughed nervously. "I'm just worried I'm not qualified..."

"Oh don't worry about day-to-day operations." said Milly. "Our treasurer and I will handle all the details..." she gestured to Lelouch.

"Wait, what?" said Lelouch. "Who said I was going to be-"

"Being a leader is easy!" said Milly.

"(No it isn't.)" whispered Lightning.

"All you need to do is look pretty for the camera and act inspiring to the group!"

"(And make tough decisions, assume responsibility for mistakes, be at the vanguard of every fight... you sure you're up to this?)"

"(Uh... I.)" Shirley looked at Lelouch's smiling face, and then back at Lightning. "(Yeah... I think I can do this.)"

Lightning nodded. "(Allright, if you say so. But just remember; I went through all this once myself. If you everneed to talk about something, I should be the first one you go to.)"

"So, back to business." Gendo said. He handed Lelouch a thick stack of papers. "These are the records for the Justice Society fund, as well as the stipulations on what it can and cannot be used for. Buildings, vehicles, just about anything is fair game aside from nuclear materials, controlled substances, and weapons of mass destruction. There's even room in the budget for good-sized salaries, so if you wish you can consider the Justice Society to be your full-time jobs."

"Woo! I'm rich! ...is what I would be saying if I wasn't already." said Rivalz.

"I'm going to need to quit the police force then." said Lightning. "My guess is that this is going to eat up a lot of my time... think we can get a forensics lab in our headquarters?"

"Probably." said Lelouch. "I don't think I've ever seen this many zeroes in one place..."

"I can easily get the stuff in my own lab shipped over." said Shulk. "We just need to make sure that the building is located on a ley-line. We might even need to construct one if we can't find one that's naturally occurring."

"And a medical center! Some staff might be nice as well."

"I need some stuff too..." muttered Nina.

"Don't forget the publicity budget!" said Milly. "We need to get the word out after all."

"I swear, Milly; sometimes you're just as bad as Superbat..." Lelouch replied. "But I'll take that into account. I'll write up a budget for tomorrow, and by the end of the week we should have our headquarters."

"Simon grinned. In that case, as your new Chairman, I declare this meeting to be adjourned!"

* * *

"I'm sorry, I'm not really following." said SELEE-06. "Wouldn't our work better if we had fewer cape-wearing morons running around, not more?"

Gendo sighed. "Because, number six, if you had bothered to actually read any of my research, you would realize that we need an Anti-AT field of biblical proportions, when an Anti-AT field in general is something that is currently only theoretical." Gendo pulled up his notes in order to make absolutely sure that what he was saying made sense. "Our original plan involved alienating The Third Child to the point that his ego shattered completely, forcing the creation of an Anti-AT field at the peak of his ability. If subject zero's output was anything to go on, The Third Child will have more than enough power by the time the Angels arrive. However, certain factors have prevented this phase of the plan from being completed..."

"And by 'certain factors', of course, you mean yourself." Gendo could imagine SELEE-03 staring at him disapprovingly. "Face it, Ikari. You've gone soft. What happened to the man who was willing to throw his wife, his career, and even his own son to the dogs for the greater good of mankind? Has his era come and gone without so much as a goodbye?"

"Number Three!" snapped SELEE-04 "I will remind you that we are not allowed to refer to each other by name during these meetings..."

"Oh yes, I forgot how much you scribes love to keep your secrets." SEELE-03 replied. "Very well then, I'll humor you. Tell me, Number Two; what is your plan exactly?"

"As I was saying..." Gendo continued, "...an AT-Field is a physical manifestation of the ego, the boundary that separates souls from one-another. Because of this, full understand of another being is impossible..." he scrolled down a few pages into his notes. "...however, the mere act of trying to understand another soul can cause the AT-Field to 'leak', and in extreme cases a permanent bond between souls can be formed. This, we believe, is a natural occurrence of an Anti-AT field's creation." he took a deep breath. "And, by allowing The Third Child to establish a bond of camaraderie between his peers, by severing said connection we'll be able to release an Anti-AT Field of the appropriate magnitude."

"...So you're seriously suggesting..." said SELEE-07 "...that we cause Instrumentality using the power of friendship."

"And MURDER!" said SELEE-06. "I like this plan! The second part at least."

"Number Two, this is unacceptable!" said SELEE-01. "You deviated from the plan without unanimous approval! How dare you-"

"Pardon me if I interrupt..." said SELEE-13 "Number Two's plan is actually quite plausible. In fact, if successful, it might actually be more efficient than our original plan. I've run the numbers myself."

"As have I." said SELEE-10. "And I've shared Number Two's concerns over the Third Child, especially after both how the Second Child turned out, and our lack of progress on the Evangelion project."

"Speaking of which, I still believe the project is a waste of time..." said SELEE-09. "Horrific monstrosities might have been an appropriate test in The Age of the Gods, but times have changed. No one had expected the arrival of Superman, and since then the Earth has only become a more chaotic place. If we took the dead sea scrolls literally, The Angel Invasion would come and go without anyone batting an eye were it not for our plan. Especially when we've already had a literal angel invasion."

"Oh come on!" shouted SELEE-06 "You're just saying that because you're a girl! Of course you don't like giant robots!"

"No, I must agree with Nine." said SELEE-08. "The Evangelions should not be our first priority. My guess is that the Angel attacks will be more subtle, thus we need subtle tools for the job..."

"The feasibility of the Evangelion project is beyond the scope of our meeting." said SELEE-12. "May I propose that this meeting be adjourned before we fall further off topic?"

"Seconded." said SELEE-04. "The lot of you are starting to get on my nerves..."

"Just one last thing..." said SELEE-11. "Number Two, it has come to my attention that you have allowed my children to become involved with this so-called 'Justice Society'."

"...as noncombatants, yes." said Gendo. "They seemed eager to support their friend, and the chairman was more than willing to-."

"I don't care who's idea it was. I want them off the team at once" said SELEE-11. "You know as well as I do that non-combatants in any team are the first targets of vengeful supervillains, and the last thing I want is to see their faces in the obituaries."

"...that's not under my jurisdiction, Eleven. It would be a gross breach of conduct if I-"

"Well if you can't handle this, then I'll find someone to do it for me. And I can't promise that he'll play nicely with your little 'League'."

"Just so we understand; the Third Child is to remain-"

"OF COURSE he'll be unharmed. What kind of idiot do you take me for?" SELEE-11 rumbled. "That boy of yours is worth more than any of our heads combined. Certainly more that that useless whelp my third wife left behind..."

* * *

"...Well, that was very uncharacteristic of you, sticking up for Shirley like that." C.C. said. "Or are you planning to lead this "Justice Society" from the shadows, ruling with an iron fist through it's new vice-chairman?"

Lelouch took a long look at C.C.'s latest outfit. He had heard of "hiding in plain sight", but what she was wearing now bordered on ridiculous. She was wearing a crimson top decorated with images of flowers, detached sleeves of similar design, high heels, a bow tying her hair into a ponytail, and a pink cape that looked more like an old blanket. The only reason why they weren't getting any stares is that the bus they were on was passing through the Harajuku district, and thus was filed dozens of other cosplayers. In fact, Lelouch could probably wear his Zero costume in broad daylight here and no one would notice.

In any case, Lelouch was too used to C.C.'s odd fashion sense to bring this up, and anyway they had more important business to attend to.

"Possibly." he said. "In any case I'd need to have a plant in their organization; It's just a stroke of luck I happened to be so close to one of the members."

"Yes, but is that good luck or bad?"

"...what do you mean?"

"Suppose... someone got the wrong idea about the Black Knights. After all, they are a military force not accountable to any government. Should they send the Society after you, would you be willing to pull the trigger on your own friend?"

"...that's not going to happen."

C.C. slouched in her seat. "That's what you always say right before things go wrong."

"No, I mean it; the members are anything but government stooges. and in any case our relationship with the Japanese government is-"

"...on the verge of collapsing due to our recent failures. While we did capture Mordred, Morgaine herself escaped and took out our best Knightmare pilot."

"...look, I'm sure whatever kind of curse Kallen's under, they're be a way to break it and-"

"Lelouch. You don't know what's actually happened, do you?"

Lelouch raised an eyebrow "And you do?"

"Possibly..." C.C. looked around the room in case anyone was listening in. "Call it a hunch, but I think Kallen might be a..."

* * *

"...VAMPIRE!" screamed the the strange old man. "Yes, it is clear to I, MERASMUS, that Kallen Stadfeldt-"

"Kozuki." corrected Kallen.

"...was bitten by a bloodsucking fiend of the night, and even now is going through a HORRIFIC TRANSFORMATION!"

Kallen didn't really know what to make of this so-called "Magician." Draped in brown robs and wearing what appeared to be a ram's skull on his head, Merasmus appeared less like a powerful magus and more like a crazy hobo with a funny walking stick. Rather than running any sort of test, the moment he arrived he called for all the division leaders to assemble so that he could deliver a "SHOCKING REVELATION!" because apparently possessing phenomenal cosmic power was also a license to write flyers in all caps with multiple explanation points. Needless to say, only the medic and those sufficiently bored enough to find entertainment in listening to an crazy man's ranting (i.e. Shinichiro Tamaki) bothered to show up.

The medic facepalmed.

"Yes, you see it's quite obvious!" He pulled out the medic's silver cross again, much to Kallen's displeasure. "Crosses are a traditional vampire weakness! Therefore, she must be a vampire!" He then opened Kallen's mouth, and put his fingers behind her teeth, which seemed to be a bit sharper than usual. "And look at these fangs! Clearly, the girl has truly become an unholy creature of the night!"

"Um... dude?" said Tamaki. "It's the middle of the afternoon, and she's in direct sunlight." he pointed to the open window.

"FOOL!" Merasmus raised his arms dramatically. "It is a MISCONCEPTION that all vampires burst into flames in the light! Sometimes it does NOTHING! Other times, it makes them SPARKLE! It's really kind of a crapshot."

"Zhen, wouldn't she have bite marks?" said the medic.

Merasmus looked at Kallen's bite-free neck. "Oh. Good point." he scratched his head. "In that case she must be a WEREWOLF!"

"Zhe full moon was out last night, and nothink out of zhe ordinary happened."

"...err maybe she's a zombie?" Merasmus reached into his robes, and produced a jar containing a skull with a brain still inside, floating in a jar of unknown liquid. "You don't have an irresistible urge to eat this PICKLED MONKEY BRAIN, do you?"

Kallen shrugged. "...not really."

"Good, more for me, then!" the magician reached into the jar and pulled out it's contents, before taking a big bite into the brain. "Mnow." he said as he chewed, "mets see mhat melse is min mere..."

After swallowing, he pulled out a large tome that said "Monster Manual, Core Rulebook III". "Now let's see... maybe she's a kelpie."

"A what?" said Tamaki.

"A water spirit that causes drownings... oh wait, it's supposed to be in the shape of a horse. Let's start at the beginning. Let's see... Aboleth? No, wait, not enough legs... Achairai? No, too many legs... an Allip? No, wait, those only come out of suicides... you can't be an Angel, that's for sure... I'VE GOT IT! You must be an Animated- oh, wait, nevermind, that's dumb. False alarm."

Kallen sighed. This was going to be a long day.

* * *

"[I'm BOOOOOOOOORED.]" Hope yelled, her face pressed against the door of her cell. "[I forgot to bring my DS and the cell is really boring and why am I in a cell anyway when I didn't do anything bad?]"

"Yeah! Come on, Ikari!" Detective Maniwa said. "We've been watching her for almost a day..."

"You know as well as I do that this is standard procedure for unknown metahumans." Keiichi sighed. He then looked at the kid. "[Well, if you want to leave so quickly, maybe you could at least tell me who your parents are so they can pick you up?]"

"[I can't do that, silly! I'm running away from home!]"

"Told you our patience would pay off..."

Detective Maniwa bent his so that he could talk to Hope at something more akin to her eye level. "[Oh really?]" he said. "[How come?]"

"[Uh... my dad beats me!]" she said. "[With a stick! And shoves hot pokers in my eye!]" she pointed at her eye to emphasize this fact.

"[Really?]"

"[Yeah! And... uh once, Santa gave me a puppy for Christmas, and... uh... my dad threw into a woodchipper because... I didn't eat my broccoli! Like in that move! What that guy! In Minnesota!]"

Detective ikari was nonplussed. "[...Aren't you a little young to be seeing movies like that?]"

"[Uhh... he beat me for that, too!]" shouted Hope. "[And then he made me watch it again! While beating me! With a baseball bat!]"

Ikari got up from his stool. "No more questions. Come on, Maniwa."

"[Hey, don't leave me hanging! Can you at least bring me a TV or something?]"

"Actually, we do have an old pocket TV in the supply closet. I'm sure there's an English language news station or something she could watch. Is that okay?"

Keiichi shrugged. "If it keeps her quiet."

One trip to the supply closet later, the two detectives were heading out the door of the station, and were soon heading home.

"So..." Detective Maniwa said as they boarded the subway, "...do you think the kid's telling the truth?"

"About what?" said Detective Ikari. "Running away? Or the beatings?"

"I dunno."

"Running away is plausible, though I'll be damned if I knew how she got all the way to Japan..." Ikari looked at his partner. "...but do you really buy that sob story about the beatings?"

"Well, she does have a healing factor..."

"She's making it up. I can tell. She's probably some middle-class suburbanite who's daddy works at S.T.A.R. Labs." Ikari sighed and buried himself in his newspaper. "My diagnosis? The kid's seen too much Fargo, and you've seen too much Special Victims Unit."

"...what's 'Fargo'?"

"An American movie about a plan that went horribly wrong. Funny in a bleak sort of way. You should watch it sometime." the detective grabbed onto the nearby bar as the train screeched to a stop. "Well, here's my stop." he looked at his partner. "You're coming with me, tonight. I want you to meet my wife."

"Uh, actually I had something to-"

"Is someone dead?"

"No..."

"Good. Because there's this new curry recipe we've been meaning to try, and I want an outside opinion." Ikari started to leave the train. "You coming?"

Detective Maniwa looked at his watch. If he was lucky, he might be able to make it back home in time to...

"Maniwa!" Ikari shouted. "I said are you coming?"

Maniwa looked up, and then chased after his partner. "Uh... okay! Hold up!"

* * *

From his throne, the conqueror watched as the world continued to spiral into chaos...

"[...an armed confrontation in Mexico City...]"

"[...has once again evaded jailtime despite overwhelming evidence against...]"

"[...at least five banks into debt, was awarded a seven billion dollar bonus...]"

"[...tens of thousands thought to be dead in the wake of Brainiac's latest...]"

"[...Khandaqi terrorists have claimed responsibility for...]"

"[...wanted for seventeen counts of rape in the past month alone, continues to evade thanks to his body-jumping powers...]"

Before him were dozens of television screens, each one displaying a different news broadcast from somewhere in the world. The channels changed occasionally, as an advanced computer program of the conqueror's own design ran in the background, skipping past commercials and human interest stories to only inform him of the most tragic results of mankind's follies for hours upon end.

To an ordinary man, such a ritual would be maddening. But for the conqueror's superior mind it was a mere part of his daily routine, a reminder of his purpose.

"The world is corrupt, and cannot be trusted to rule itself."the conqueror stared at his palm, clutching it as if he were holding an invisible globe. "One day, I will succeed where others have failed." he clenched his fist. "I will bring order and stability to this hopeless planet!"

The conqueror felt his pulse rising, an unstable euphoria as the blood rushed to his head, but rather than act on impulse he instead attempted to remain calm.

"...but if I rush too quickly, my plan will be over before it has even begun, Just as the revolutionaries before me..." the conqueror exhaled sharply. "...best, then, that I keep my ambitions in check. For they will no doubt lead to my undoing..."

Just then, the conqueror's highly sensitive ears picked up something coming from one of his monitors. A man with calendar dates tattooed around his forehead was speaking as news anchor. "[...In other news, Prime Minister Gendo Ikari of Japan has just announced the unveiling of a new super team, "The Justice Society of Japan".]"

The conqueror raised an eyebrow.

The news anchor continued to speak. "[For now, little is known about the team's roster save for it's chairman, 'Simon the Digger', a hero best known for leading the counterattack against the Spiral Kingdom's sudden invasion, and it's vice-chairman, an up-and-coming heroine known as "Amazingly Powerful Girlborg"..."

A rare scowl crossed the conqueror's face. His fingernails dug into his palm as his hand tightened even further. "Those...IMBECILES!" In the safety of his own mind, the conqueror raged. "The real Justice Society were nothing if not honorable warriors of the purest intent. And now these pretenders think they can repeat history? Such fools need to be put in their place!"

"[Only time will tell if they will be able to surpass the legendary status of Big Science Action, as well as (to a much, much, much lesser extent) Super Young Team...]"

The conqueror stood up and beckoned for his minion. "EXCEL!" he cried, his imposing voice echoing through the chambers of his underground palace.

From out of the shadows, a teenage girl scramble to address her superior, carrying a large cardboard box marked with a skull and crossbones. Like any good lackey, she was wearing an outfit that could best be generously described as "iconic"; a tiny white jacket with large, egg-shaped epaulets, a black cleavage-exposing vest with blue trimmings around her bosom, white short-shorts, black, fingerless gloves, and a pair of white boots. Topping off the package was a mop of thick, orange hair that the conqueror swore used to be blonde.

The conqueror would have continued his speech then an there, but the moment his minion was within earshot she launched into a whirlwind of loquacious babble. "Hey there boss I just got the fireworks you asked me to get! Also I got Lollita Canary's phone number so we can track her by hacking into her phone except I dropped it and now I have to spend all night fishing through the sewers which I don't mind really but it's very unsanitary so I had to steal some scuba gear from the yakuza but they didn't like that so they chased me around for a few hours shooting at me with guns and-"

"I'm sure your story is quite fascinating, but I'm afraid we have much more important matters to attend to." The conqueror hid his arms underneath his cape for dramatic effect. "As of today, we will no longer try to destroy Super Young Team."

"Aww! Really? And I wanted Superbat's autograph! I asked Number Seven for it but you know how he is with remembering things always losing his keys and stuff. By the way when are the Ten-Ben Matanga getting out of prison? The headquarters is very quiet without them and I was looking forward to playing parcheesi with-"

It was times like this that The Conqueror wished he could just shoot his minions when they annoyed him. But Excel was "special" in more ways that one. Though more dense than a sack of bricks, her loyalty to the cause was unshakable. If only he had a thousand of her, then perhaps their sheer numbers would cancel out her own bottomless stupidity.

"-and Number Two was like "nuh-uh" and I was like "yah-huh" and then he punched me in the face but we've gotten off track here what were you talking about again because I think you said we weren't going to fight Super Young Team anymore but if so then I'm kind of wondering why we're going to do that I mean wasn't it just last month that you said that they were scum that were corrupting the youth of our fair country?"

Grateful for the pause, the Conqueror took a moment to adjust his glasses."That may be true, but recent developments have proved that we were merely swatting at flies. While we chased that band of idiots, we failed to notice the seeds of destruction sown within our midst!"

A click of a remote control was heard, and suddenly all the monitors in the room changed to show but one image; a still frame from the news report on the new Justice Society.

"Youths brought up on nothing but the corrupting influence of anime and dubstep have made it their goal to pervert the image of a proud tradition." As he raised his voice, the almost empty room seemed to shake with fright. "As well-intentioned as they are, if their so-called 'heroism' will inevitably destroy a cherished symbol that is our most noble enemy, then we have no choice but to defend it with our last breath!" The conqueror extended his hand, carrying his cape as he did so, once again putting on a show for the one-woman audience. "From now on, ACROSS is one-hundred percent dedicated to destruction of the Justice Society of Japan!"

"HAIL IL PALAZZO!" applauded Excell, "YOUR LEADERSHIP IS A SHINING EXAMPLE TO US ALL OR AT LEAST THOSE OF US WHO ARE HERE WHICH IS ACTUALLY JUST ME BUT I'M SURE THE TEN-BEN MATANGA WOULD BE HAPPY IF THEY WERE HERE BECAUSE THAT WAS A REALLY GOOD SPEECH IN FACT MAYBE I SHOULD RECORD IT WITH MY PHONE AND BREAK INTO PRISON JUST TO SHOW IT TO THEM AND THEN THEY'LL BE SO INSPIRED THAT THEY IMMEDIATELY BREAK OUT BUT FIRST THINGS FIRST BECAUSE LIKE YOU SAID THE JUSTICE SOCIETY IS OUR TOP PRIORITY AND..."

As he tried to tune out Excell's babbling, Il Palazzo's trigger finger began to itch. He wondered if next time he should just send her a memo...

-END OF CHAPTER-

BETHANY SNOW: And welcome back to Channel 52 News! And now, continuing his expose on urban legends, here's intrepid reporter A. Bug with the scoop on so-called "Fan Death".

AMBUSH BUG: Thanks, Bethany! Apparently in Korea there's this rumor going around that your ceiling fan could kill you in your sleep. And I don't mean by falling on you, I mean just by doing normal fan things. Now, if I asked you this you'd probably be saying, "Ambush Bug, that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Do you mean to tell me that you broke into my house just to tell me that! Get out of here before I call the cops!" But here at Channel 52 we hold yourself to a higher standard, to get to the truth no matter what! He're my exclusive interview with Dr. Phelan Porteous, as he answers the most pressing question of our age: Can your ceiling fan kill you?

DR. PORTEOUS: No.

AMBUSH BUG: Well that was disappointing. Back to you, c-man!

CALENDER MAN: Thank you, Bug. In other news, Prime Minister Gendo Ikari of Japan has just announced the unveiling of a new super team, "The Justice Society of Japan". For now, little is known about the team's roster save for it's chairman, 'Simon the Digger', a hero best known for leading the counterattack against the Spiral Kingdom's sudden invasion, and it's vice-chairman, an up-and-coming heroine known as "Amazingly Powerful Girlborg". Only time will tell if they will be able to surpass the legendary status of Big Science Action, as well as (to a much, much, much lesser extent) Super Young Team.

BETHANY SNOW: Now we got to our foreign correspondent for an update on the Big Ben mystery!

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Thank you, Snow! I'm here with this fine fellow, who claims to have seen the one who blew up Big Ben yesterday. In addition, we have Squire, of Britain's own dynamic duo, who will use her "communication powers" to translate the man's incomprehensible rhyming slang for the folks across the pond. Now, tell me, what did he look like.

COCKNEY CHAP: I din't get a Robin Hood butcher's at 'im, but 'e was wearin' a Hoppin' Pot of gold.

SQUIRE: He says, "I didn't get a good look, at 'em, but I do remember 'e was wearin a lot o' gold."

COCKNEY CHAP: I adam 'n eve 'e was carryin' 'round a bunch of blades.

SQUIRE: And he also remembered he had lot of swords...

COCKNEY CHAP: ...and I seem ter recall 'is Barnet Fair was as blonde as wheat.

SQUIRE: And that he was blonde. Very blonde, in fact.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Well there you have it, this clearly must be the work of Deathstroke the Terminator. Because who else wears that much yellow and fights with a sword?

COCKNEY CHAP: 'ey! wot do ya fin' you're tryin' ter pull! I said 'e was wearin' gold, not yella!

SQUIRE: He says it was gold, not yellow.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Little known fact: gold is a kind of yellow! Back to you, snow!

* * *

Author's Notes:

New 52 Reboot? What's that? :P

Okay, I admit there are somethings that I do like about the reboot that I brought over to this story. The Channel 52 segments are one of them (obviously), and I enjoy a couple of the titles that came out of the reboot (most notably Demon Knights), and as of this writing I'm finding the "Trinity War" event to be much more interesting (and less pretentious) than I thought it would be (though that may change :P). And to a certain extent I can understand why DC would want to clear it's continuity; too much background can make it paralyzing for new readers to get into, and writers need to have an encyclopedic knowledge of their characters if they want to do anything new with them. I know I did.

Still, there are a few things that leave me miffed, most notably the idea that superheroes are only a fairly recent development in the world, retroactively eliminating large swathes of DC canon including the first two blue beetles, and the Justice Society of America, my own personal favorite superhero team. Oh, and naming Captain Marvel "Shazam". Because if you were going to change his name to avoid confusing with Marvel Comic's Captain Marvel(s), OF COURSE you should have his name be the same as someone else in his own little cast heard.

So for this story I decided that while an event similar to flashpoint happened in this continuity, the effects weren't nearly as drastic. I don't want to define everything outright because then this story would just be me explaining my own made up continuity forever.

Now: onto stuff about the story itself.

I considered not having the SELEE conversation, but trust me; there is a LOT going on in this story. Their plans are just the beginning, folks; not the end. And lets face it. If you've seen Evangelion or spent enough time on the TV Tropes wiki, you probably know what they're up to. And if not, this is explaining things a heck of a lot better than the TV show did.

And now to address the elephant in the room; why the hell did I pick Shirley Fenette as one of the main heroines? After all, everyone else so far makes sense; Simon, Shulk and Lightning are unambiguously heroes, and even in canon Shinji has his heroic moments when he's not being crazy or emo. But Shirley isn't any kind of hero, she's a character who seems like she belong in a Shojo series, not a shonen mecha show. Of Lelouch's three love interests, she's the only one who isn't an action girl to some extent, and is arguably pretty stereotypical. If the show was primarily about her, it would fail the Bechdel Test pretty hard since Lelouch is pretty much all she ever thinks about.

And yet... I felt that she was very endearing nonetheless. Even if Lelouch doesn't want to have a serious relationship with her, it's clear that he cares deeply for Shirley and values her friendship. The thought that he was responsible for Shirley's father's death visibly shakes him, and I feel that her death towards the end of the series is arguably what pushes Leleouch over the edge. And on Shirley's side, her discovery that Lelouch is Zero presents a set of serious moral dilemmas: It's her duty as a Britannian to confront him, but the Black Knights have very good reasonsfor rebelling. She's known Lelouch for years and loves him, yet Zero is the one who caused her father's death. Which of course makes her own death all the more tragic when she finally comes to her decision. Or at least that's how I see it.

Also:

C.C. is supposed to be Dressed as Terra from Final Fantasy 6 in her scene with Lelouch.

The detective guys are leaving a Kōban, not a normal-sized police station. However I chose to call it a police station because most americans don't know what a Koban is.

Any discrepancies between how the events portrayed and how the real-life Tokyo Metropolitan Police would actually treat a child who fell from the sky can be put down to "budget cuts".

HAIL ILPALAZZO!


	4. Chapter 4

[COVER: The Justice Society of Japan logo is awkwardly covered up by a new logo that appears to be cast from gold and decorated with sparkling gems, reading "Electra Pendragon". Below is a subtitle that reads "The Savior of our Era" in cursive text. The scene itself depicts said character, a teenage girl with fair skin, red eyes and platinum blonde hair, wearing a suit of golden plate armor decorated with blue patterns as well as a red cape. She is currently trying to pose in an a smug yet elegant manner, but her efforts have been hindered by Hope, who is trying to use Electra as a stepladder (against her will, of course) in order to cover up the Electra Pendragon logo with a crudely-made sign drawn on a piece of cardboard. The sign reads "HOPE" with the subtitle "GREATEST HERO**EVAR**!" [sic]. Some text off to the side reads, "NOT A DREAM! NOT AN IMAGINARY STORY! A mysterious new heroine joins the Justice Society!" and a block of text below that reads "Also featuring: Deathstroke the Terminator" followed by a little chibi head of Deathstroke glaring at the reader.]

* * *

At the crack of dawn, A single ray of light shined through Hope's cell, illuminating her face, pulling her out of a deep sleep. But her awakening was far from peaceful; the walls echoed with the cacophonous din of endless incomprehensible Japanese. Groggily, she forced her eyes open to search for the source of the noise, and found it to be coming from the pocket TV the detectives had given her.

"[Mmm. Musta fallen asleep...]" She yawned, and thought about how she had tried to stay up all night watching weird game shows. But while last night the screen was lit up with the antics of hapless contestants running from mascots wielding neon pink baseball bats, now all that was left was an infomercial featuring a sketchy, middle-aged guy who appeared to be desperately trying to sell oven mitts.

She twisted the volume knob down a bit so she could think. "[Alright...]" she tried to stretch out her palms to try and crack her knuckles, but just ended up with sore fingers. "[I overshot my target, but that's okay. I just gotta let Dad's men take me to California, then all I need to do is escape and I can hitchhike the rest of the way!]"

But even with her plan in mind, Hope wasn't quite so confident it would work. So to relieve some stress, she did a headstand on the cell bench to let her worries drain out of her body, and into her head. Or at least that's what she tried tried to do. Despite her efforts Hope fell off the bench and broke her neck, though thanks to her healing factor she recovered from this normally debilitating injury in just a matter of seconds. She didn't even scream, as Hope had long ago built up a remarkable tolerance to pain as a result of repeatedly testing her limits by doing stupidly reckless things (such as trying to stand on one's head to relieve stress).

"[AAAGH!]" she tantrumed, flailing her legs around in the air, "[This is gonna take FOREVER.]" Starved for entertainment, she grabbed the TV, turned up the volume, and began to flick through channels at random, passing channel after channel without understanding a word of what was being said. "[Stupid teleporter... Why couldn't I end up somewhere that speaks American?]"

As if to answer her prayers, the very next channel she turned to Channel 52, an English-speaking international news network. A man with a British accent wearing a tweed jacket was reporting from what appeared to be a park crowded with people of every shape and size, wearing any number of colorful costumes.

"[Thank you, Calender Man]" said the guy in the Tweed Jacket. "[I'm here at the Hamarikyu Gardens in Tokyo, following up on your report of the new super team known as 'The Justice Society of Japan'.]" He gestured to the multitudes behind him. "[It's been just one day since the roster was announced, and already the team's recruitment drive is off to a smashing success. I mean just LOOK at all those brave young men, women, genderless aliens, cyborgs, and combinations of the above. I don't think I've seen this many crime-fighters in one place since Super Young Team's own recruitment drive.]"

The camera then panned over to reveal a busty young woman with blonde hair, sporting a Power Girl costume and a domino mask. It was a pretty good impression, actually, though hope noted that the real Power Girl was considerably more buff.

Tweed-jacket, meanwhile continued to speak. "[Anyway, today I'm speaking with the group's publicist, who despite not being a crime-fighter herself has nevertheless decided to hide her true identity for safety reasons.]" He pointed the microphone at the young woman. "[Now tell me, how many new members are you recruiting?]"

["It's hard to say, really."] the young woman replied, "[But we're estimating somewhere around two, maybe three.]"

"[So you're saying most of these folks will be going home disappointed?]"

"[Sadly. But it's not often that the Japanese hero community gets together like this, so I'd like to feel like they'll be going home with something, at least.]"

"[Well then, would you like to share with the audience what you expect out of a new recruit?]"

"[By all means!]" the young lady smiled. "[We're looking for someone driven. Someone anxious to go out and save the day each morning. Someone enthusiastic, animated, a real force of personality.]" her smile then turned into sort of a smirk. ["And of course, bringing something new to the table wouldn't hurt."]

"[Well that's about all the time we have, miss!"] said Mr. Tweed Jacket. ["Back to you, Snow."]

The scene then cut back to a newsroom, where an anchorwoman was sitting at her desk. "[Thank you, Doctor. Coming up, the world's leading Paleontologists discuss the so-called "Hollow Earth" theory. But first, here's Joseph Coyne with the latest on Wall Street...]"

Hope turned off the TV, lied down on her back, and began to stare at the ceiling.

"[...I wonder how far away that Hamarikyu place is?"] she asked aloud. She then rolled over onto her stomach, letting her hands hold up her face. ["Too bad I'm locked up in here. Else I might just take a little detour..."]

She looked at her fingernails. Then at the wall, and then at her fingernails again. Instantly, she sharpened them into claws.

"[Hmm...]"

* * *

"...you know, ever since I was a kid I've always wondered what a superhero meeting actually looked like." Simon frowned at his half-eaten omelette. "This... isn't what I imagined."

Shirley nodded silently. Breakfast at a "Big Belly Burger" franchise wasn't exactly the kind of place that screamed out for superheroic feats, made worse by all the stares they were getting due to their costumes; even Shinji was trying to hide his identity by wearing a flimsy plastic sentai mask he bought at a dollar store. Still, it was the one place everyone could agree on for lunch.

"Yeah, well, beggars can't be choosers." Lightning bit off the end of her french fry. "So, first things first; the HQ isn't up. What do we do until then?"

"Maybe we should recruit some more members?" Simon shrugged.

"We've got six guys as it is, not to mention a support staff..." said Shulk. "How many more do we need?"

"I dunno. As many as we want to join."

"That's helpful..." Lightning said.

Shinji, meanwhile was too transfixed on Shirley and her chicken salad. Not because he found her particularly attractive (though that probably helped), but more that there was a nagging question in the back of his mind. "Um... Girborg?" He asked.

Shirley looked to the side.

"I... I don't mean to be rude," Shinji stammered "...but aren't you a robot?"

Still chewing her food, Shirley nodded.

"So... why do you need to eat?"

Shirley's antennae twitched. She took a moment to swallow before replying. "I don't know. Nina says that my body contains a complete digestive system, but she isn't sure if I'm actually getting energy from it, or if my brain just thinks I still need food..." Putting down her fork, she looked at her hand and sighed.

An array of things Shinji could have said flew through his mind, such as "Is something wrong?", "Don't worry about it." or even "I think you are a very beautiful young lady even if you are a few years older than me and are a robot please by my girlfriend."

Instead, he changed the subject. "So... yeah! Recruitment! That would be cool! Lets do that. Like, we'll get posters and set up a booth in the park or something..."

Lightning shook her head. "We can't do that. The logistics would be a nightmare. We'd need to rent a venue, contact everyone, find a way to guarantee everyone's safety should they show up..."

Simon looked at his phone. "I dunno, Milly seems to be doing a pretty good job on her own..." He held the phone up for everyone to see, revealing a picture of Milly, Nia and Dr. Summers at a desk with a yellow tablecloth in front of a large crowd of people with Lelouch and Rivalz in the background, keeping things orderly.

Lightning snatched the phone away. "Give me that..." She tapped it a couple times to reveal the Twitter client Simon was using. The picture had apparently come from " OfficalJSJ", and the accompanying post read "didn't think there'd be such a turnout, LOL #JusticeSocietyJapan".

She then shoved the phone back in Simon's face. "What the hell is this?"

"Well, Milly wanted to do some recruiting so I said she could..."

"...put your girlfriend in danger by sending unarmed teenagers to solicit strangers for help in broad daylight where some revenge-seeking psycho could get to her!? Are you out of your mind?! Why didn't you tell me about this?!"

"Uhhhhhhh..." Simon said. "Well, Girlborg said she was okay with it..."

"What? No!" Shirley panicked. "Milly just... popped this question out of nowhere and I told her to ask you!" she pointed back at Simon.

Lightning facepalmed "...great. Just great. Why don't we just put Ashford in charge of the team for all the good our so-called leaders are doing?"

"You worry too much, Light." said Simon. "I mean, we're not even a team yet. What's the worst thing that could happen?"

* * *

Slade Wilson was one of the best assassins in the world. Guns, swords, poisons, it didn't matter how you wanted someone killed, Deathstroke the Terminator could do it. So he was very surprised this morning when he received a contract not to kill, but to "save".

Of course he used the term "save" loosely, since as far as he could tell his targets, Lelouch and Nunnally Lamperouge, a scrawny young fop and his cripple of a sister, were exactly where they wanted to be, and of their own free will to boot. He was almost willing to write the whole thing off as the rantings of an upper-class twit who thought that just because he had a fancy title that he could send assassins to pick up the milk, when he saw just how muchhe was being offered. Not to mention the little detail that they were being guarded by another assassin with a strange power that made the mission that much more... interesting.

But to the world at large, today he was not Deathstroke the Terminator, or even Slade Wilson. He was Hiro Miyamoto, a bedraggled salaryman who always seemed to be in a rush because he was too cheap to afford public transportation. It was one of the many roles Slade had prepared when he did business in Japan, not unlike the ninja of old. The realninja, that is, the ones more concerned with killing people than ludicrous martial arts techniques. All it took to complete the illusion was some makeup, a worn-out suit, a change in posture, and a glass eye. The eye was the important part; everyone was so used to seeing Deathstroke without one that even Batman might skip over Slade if he was doing his job right.

And speaking of his job, Hiro was late to a very important meeting, so he disregarded his usual ban on taking the train in order to get there faster. The fact that Hiro's route just happened to match the way that Deathstroke's targets took went unnoticed by all.

Eventually, Hiro arrived at a park at the same time Lelouch did. And just as Lelouch had stopped in order to man some kind of booth, so too did Hiro realize that maybe he wasn't as late as he thought he was, and maybe his boss wouldn't be too mad if he bought a hot dog wandered the park for a while. And if he was an assassin, then instead of looking quizzically at the gaggle of costumed youths gathered around the booth, he would have been sizing them up, trying to decide how many he could take should it come down to a confrontation.

And while Hiro and not Deathstroke read his newspaper and didn't perform calculations in his head on just whom he could get away with killing, he walked straight into a caucasian girl with platinum blonde hair and piercing red eyes. She was wearing bright golden armor that looked made for appearance rather than practicality, and was equipped with over a dozen sheaths holding everything from daggers to greatswords. Some even larger weaponry was strapped to her back, and also carried a pair of pearl-handled silver revolvers that didn't even look like they had ever been used.

"Watch where you're going, plebeian." the girl said, pushing back at the perceived salaryman with enough force to knock him over. "You're lucky that I haven't made a name for myself yet, else I would demand more respect!"

Hero bowed as a quick apology, but the girl wouldn't even stick around to acknowledge this. If he were an assassin, Hiro would have been adding the girl her to his mental checklist of "people I need to kill before I die". Instead, he just hung his head solemnly and mumbled something about "kids these days".

* * *

"Milly. How did you get so many people here at once in such a short time?" Lightning was doing her best to stay tranquil.

"It was easy!" Milly turned in her seat to look back at Lightning. "All I did was stir up some hype on some messageboards, and word of mouth did the rest!"

Dr. Summers, meanwhile was too busy talking to the applicants to say anything while Nia took notes. "...yes that is impressive, but I'm afraid that's not really a superpower... no this is not a cosplay contest... erm, do put that down; you could really hurt someone waving it around like that... I don't think that costume is really appropriate..."

Lightning performed the rare double-facepalm and shook her head. "Please tell me you didn't tell any of them 'yes'..."

"Just one." The group turned to find a red-haired boy that none of them remembered seeing at any of the other meetings. "A newly-minted magical girl named Sayaka, though she hasn't picked a code name yet."

Lightning stared at the newcomer, sizing him up. "Do we know you?"

"I'm Shirou." he said. "Shirou Emiya. I was at the museum, remember?"

"Oh yeaaaah!" said Simon. "You were the guy who tried to shoot a sword out of a bow, right?"

"Yeah, I kinda panicked." He laughed. "I tried to think of something pointy to use, and I guess I made a mistake..."

"Don't feel too hard on yourself." said Shulk "You were untrained, in a tight spot, and I'm not sure if Projection would have done much good anyway..."

"Projection?" said Shirley.

"Conjuring things out of mid-air." said Shulk. "It's a form of Magecraft. It can be convenient at times, but it's not all that efficient."

"Well, careers have been built out of worse gimmicks..." Simon replied.

"Oh, you've got it all rong, I'm just here on the support staff." Said Shirou. "I mean, you guys saved me, it's only fair that I help you save as many lives as possible!"

"Now that's the spirit!" a blue-haired girl around Shinji's age dropped down from a nearby tree. She was wearing a blue outfit that looked more suited for a medieval adventurer than a child, with a blue bustier that looked constructed more like a breastplate, a cape, gloves, a belt with glowing red gem on it, a blue dress, and white stockings worn underneath a pair of brown boots.

"Sorry for the belated introduction, but wanted to climb a tree and I had to help her up." She pointed over her shoulder, and from tree branch a pink-haired girl waved back. "Anyway, as carrot-top over here said, I'm Sayaka! Haven't picked out a code name yet but I'm sure I'll come up with it eventually!"

Lightning looked back at Milly. "...may I ask?"

"Well, we're probably going to have a magical girl on our team eventually. And her powers arepretty good, especially for someone so inexperienced..."

"Swordplay and healing magic!" Sayaka unsheathed her blade and waved it around a bit. "I'm just about unstoppable!"

Lightning ignored for the moment that she had the exact same skill set and then some.

"...okay, that's fine..." said Simon. "But we wouldn't want your time with the Society to interfere with your duty to stop the emperor of darkness from stealing the sun or whatever."

"Ah, but that's just it!" she beamed. "While there are these monsters called 'Witches' that I need to fight, there's not really a time limit. Besides, Kyubey said I could get outside help if I needed it..."

"Kyubey?" said Simon.

"Yeah! He's the one who made me a magical girl in the first place!" She made a gesture as if she was grabbing something off her shoulder, and then holding it out for the group to see. "Can any of you see him?"

"Uhhhhhhh..." Simon looked nervously at Lightning, who just shook her head.

Shinji raised his hand slightly. "I can." he squeaked. The whole group turned their attention to him. "He's... um..." Shinji tugged at his collar. "...kind of a weasel-y thing? White fur? Beady red eyes? Erm..."

A voice rang out in everyone's head. "That's completely correct!"

Suddenly, whinin Sayaka's hands, a strange creature popped into existence. Just as Shinji said, it indeed looked kind of like a weasel, but with a bulbous head and a long, bushy tail, a sort of cat-like grin, and a floppy pair of... antenna things sticking out of his ears.

"Most people can't see me of course, and we only communicate by telepathy."the creature "said" in everyone else's mind. "But since we'll be working together for the foreseeable future, I figured I might as well reveal myself!"

"...how far does your telepathy reach?" asked Shulk.

"Several light years. Why?"

"I've heard the Martian Manhunter relays telepathic signals between Justice League members. Can you do that?"

"Of course! You only have to ask!"

"Well I'm sold." said Simon. "Consider yourselves members of the Justice Society!"

"...on a trial basis." added Lightning. "Look, this is all going a bit too fast. Nearly half our team is underage and just at a glance I suspect most of them have some serious psychological issues. If we're going to recruit anyone else we're going to need to run background checks, gather psychological profiles and you're not listening to me are you?"

"Now this, you see, is my Soul Gem! It's the source of my power, and when I change out of my costume it turns into this little egg-shaped thing. If I used too much magic it gets all cloudy, so I need to hunt Witches and collect their grief seeds to clean it..."

Simon was too busy listening to Sayaka's explanation to pay attention to anything Lightning had to say. Instead, she looked around the park to see what the others were doing. Shinji was trying to make himself scarce hiding behind a tree, Shulk was scanning the crowd because he had nothing better to do, and Shirley was standing in place, looking unsure of herself.

Lightning decided to take a risk and approach Shirley first. "Hey. Girlborg." Lightning said. "You feeling alright?"

"Huh...?" Shirley looked at Lightning. "Oh, yeah. Sorry." Shirley's hands began to tremble. "I'm okay. Really."

Lightning watched Shirley's eyes for a bit. Though they wandered constantly, every so often they would inevitably turn to look directly at Lelouch, who at that moment was talking to a costumed vigilante who was apparently dressed like a giant lobster.

"It's boy trouble, isn't it?"

"No! No! Of course not! No." Shirley lowered her head to avoid Lightning's gaze.

Lightning had never seen such a terrible liar. "Well, then what is it?"

Shirley was silent for a moment, and then looked up at Lightning and said "I... don't really know. I mean..." she looked at the crowd. "...all these people here wanting to get in... it's kind of overwhelming."

"You do realize we're only going to pick two or three if we pick any at all, right?"

"But those guys are going to be the best out of all of them! But I'm not amazing, I'm just a girl with an over-enthusiastic agent..."

"Well for one thing, my guess is that they'll be looking more at Simon than at you. Secondly, if they're looking to join a team in the first place, most of the time it's because they either lack the direction to do things by themselves, or that they're independent enough that they hadn't thought of forming their own team." Lightning put her hand on Girlborg's shoulder. "How about we try something simple. Once we're done recruiting, how about we gather up the rookies and I'll show you how to go on patrol?"

"...thanks." But despite her words, Shirley didn't seem any more cheerful. "...I'm just worried that-"

"Good news, everybody!" Milly said as she approached the pair, with a short, blonde teenager in golden armor in tow. Simon and Shulk immediately dropped what they were doing to see what all the hubbub was about. "I've just gathered another new member!" She gestured to the girl in gold. "This is-"

"I believe I can introduce myself, Lady Ashford." the girl said. "I am princess Electra Pendragon, and I have come from the far future with the purpose of averting a disaster that destroyed the world. And on this very year, in fact."

"Princess?" Lightning raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. Princess. Why? Do you think something's funny about princesses?"

"Erm, of course not, you majesty." Shulk put down the Monado for a second as he tried to remember how he was trained to act in the off-chance that hever met royalty. "But what royal family are you exactly a part of?"

"That's none of your business!" snapped Electra. "All you need to know is that my father is the greatest hero of this, or any other era."

"...you mean Superman?"

Electra's face turned red. "NO! I do NOT mean Superman!" Her red eyes almost seemed to glow as she said this. "That tyrant is an arrogant blowhard with a god complex! Such a 'man' pales in comparison to my father!"

"Soooooo... Batman, then."

"An egotistic plebeian who doesn't know his place! Do you have any more stupid guesses?"

"...Booster Gold?"

"...give us a moment." Lightning pulled the others away. "(Okay, what's the deal here?)" she whispered. "(This girl seems more like a villain than a hero...)"

"(Well every team needs an anti-hero.)" Milly replied. "(The Justice League has Batman, the JSA had Magog...)"

"(...and did you ever notice how nobody liked Magog?)" Lightning gave Milly an annoyed look.

"(And besides, I thought Light filled that role.)" Lightning shot another glare at Simon as he said this.

Shirley looked back and forth between the two. "(Wait, who's Magog?)"

"(An idiot who's now dead. That's all you need to know.)" Lightning looked back at Milly. "(Any more bright ideas?)"

"(...well, maybe we should at least give her a chance. Just for a day or two.)" said Shulk.

"(Why on earth would we do that?)"

"(Well, maybe she just wants to do good and just doesn't know how. In fact, if we left her alone, she might become a real villain instead of a pretend hero.)"

"(...and if she turns out to be an unrepentant sociopath?)"

"(Then she'll end up surrounded by people with superpowers who have been watching her all day. So they'll know exactly how she fights, and exactly how her powers work.)"

"(That's... actually a good point.)" Lightning admitted. "(I mean it's not as if her personality's going to win them over...)"

"I'm WAITING!" shouted Electra. "It isn't polite to keep a princess busy, you know."

"(You can say that again...)" Simon winced looked over his shoulder. "(But what if she lies about her powers? I mean, it could all be part of some kinda plan...)"

"(Well you could say that about any of us, but we're not yet famous enough to worry about conspiracies.)"

Shirley raised her hand. "(Uh... what about that whole 'end of the world' thing?)"

"(Another good point.)" Shulk nodded. "(Her backstory might be sketchy and unverifiable, but with a claim like that we can't throw out the possibility that she's telling the truth. Not yet at least.)"

"(...all right, but I'm keeping her in sight at all times.)" Lightning looked back at Electra for a moment. "(Shirley and I'll take Ikari and the new kid on patrol. Just promise me you won't commit to any new recruits until we get back.)"

("Uh... yeah! What she said.") said Shirley.

"(Got it.)" said Simon. "(Good luck, Light, miss Vice Chairman.)"

("Heh... you're welcome.") Shirley blushed with embarrassment.

"(Oh! One other thing!)" Milly pointed to the Tree that Sayaka had left her friend. "(Miki made me promise to induct her friend Madoka as an honorary member, kind of like a team sidekick. Think you could bring her on patrol?)"

"(No.)" Lightning moved her hand horizontally. "(Look, I might be willing to allow a loose cannon onto an unproven team, but if there's one thing I'm not doing, it's bringing a civilian on patrol.)"

* * *

"So, Madoka! Howya liken' going on patrol?" Sayaka began to walk backwards as she asked this question.

"Well, it's pretty nice so far." Madoka Kamine looked down at the city through a pair of binoculars she had rented. "I don't think I've ever been to the Tokyo Tower before!" She turned to Shinji and grinned, her smiling face sporting a purple domino mask borrowed from Milly that did absolutely nothing to hide her fluorescent pink hair with pigtails, and would have have fooled absolutely no one had anyone actually been looking for her. "You should see this, it's really cool!"

"Um... Okay." Shinji tried to look through the binoculars while wearing his own mask, but he just couldn't get the eyes to line up correctly. "Um... it's great!" he lied, "I can even see my house from here."

If Madoka noticed any deception going on, she didn't show it, instead Giggling at Shinji's words. "Well, where is it?"

"It's, uh." he waved his hand in a vaguely eastward direction. "It's kind of... over there, I guess."

"Let me see if I can spot it!" she took the binoculars back and started scanning the area. "Is it that big, weird looking building over there?"

"...I think that's a temple."

"...well, is it in that huge skyscraper?"

"...no..."

"...well, is it near the park?"

"Um... you're getting colder."

Lightning watched the two, arms crossed. Madoka's presence was keeping the group from doing anything that could put the team in actual danger, turning what was intended to be a training session where Lightning could gauge everyone's strengths and weaknesses into a glorified field trip. Even Shirley was in danger of being assimilated into the group, as even though she remained silent she was standing near enough to imply that she could join in at any moment.

It was Electra, ironically enough, who was the only one treating this trip with any amount of seriousness. Instead of goofing around, she was instead hard at work staring through something that looked like a diamond encrusted sextant. She apparently called it "The Apoco-Scope", though she remained mum on what exactly she was looking for.

"...then again, perhaps the kids have the right idea."Lightning found a nearby bench to sit on. "I am getting a bit high strung lately..."She put her hands behind her head, closed her eyes, and relaxed. "Perhaps a bit of time to clear my head would do me some good..."

And then after a few minutes she heard the unmistakable sound of someone jumping through a sheet of glass.

"Of course."thought Lightning as she opened her eyes. "Something just **has **to go wrong today, doesn't it?"She looked up, and noticed that Electra was no longer present. Instead, there was a vaguely person-sized hole in the window, and a crowd had begun to gather.

As she got up, Lightning pulled out her wallet, and flipped it open to reveal her police badge. "Police! Nobody move!" she said. She turned to Shirley. "Shinji, what happened here?"

"Well, she just out of nowhere and said 'Ah-ha!'. And then she looked at us, said something along the lines of 'follow my lead', and then she jumped out the window." he pointed at the broken glass, grimacing. "Um... is this my fault?"

Lightning shrugged. "Madoka, give me the binoculars." After the girl complied, Lightning then looked down at the crater that Electra left in her wake, then looked panned ahead to see Electra, completely unharmed, chasing after an unseen figure with surprising deftness given her weighty armor. Lightning then looked at Shirley. "Girlborg, there are traffic cameras at every intersection. Can you hack into them and see if you can track down who exactly our golden girl is chasing after?"

Shirley flinched, "I- I don't know! I've never tried that before!"

"First time for everything. If you can control a robot, a camera should be a piece of cake."

"O-okay then..." Shirley put her fingertips to her forehead, mimicking a stance she's seen psychics take on television to boost their mental concentration. "Come on... cameras... I need to see cameras..."

Almost instantly, Shirley was no longer watching the backs of her own eyelids. Rather, her vision had become one with Tokyo itself. Not content with mere traffic cameras, her technopathic powers had reached out to every networked camera in the Minato district. Phones, satellites, security cameras, all of these and more were interconnected with each other to form an unbroken panorama, all witnessed simultaneously and in real time. "Intoxicating" was too small a word for the feeling; "Ambrosic" might have fit better if such a term has existed to describe near-omniscience.

A more ambitious mortal perhaps would have had suffered delusions of godhood if given such an opportunity. But to Shirley the experience was frightening beyond compare. With a sudden gasp, she snapped back to reality.

"I am never going to close my eyes again..." Shirley whimpered.

"...I'm sorry?" said Lightning.

"I found her!" gasped Shirley, "The girl! The person. I think it's a girl. Heading towards tennis court. Young. Black cloak... kind that were popular a few years ago... Organization... I think..." She fell onto the floor. "Sorry... that was just... I think I overdid it..."

"Hm..."Lightning put one of her hands on her hips. "That must have taken too much out of her. Probably not as powerful as I hoped..." She then approached the hole in the wall, pushed a couple glass shards out of the way, and slipped on over to the other side. "You guys stay here with Girlborg. I'll be back soon." she then pointed out the window, down towards the ground, and said. "Don't follow me."

Lightning then lept through the broken window, out the observation deck, and landed on the northern corner of the Tower. Sparks flew from her footwear as she grinded down the historic landmark, before finally landing on the ground with a running start.

Back up on the deck, Sayaka watched Lightning's stunt with awe. "Hey Madoka! Betcha fifty yen that I can do that too!"

Madoka looked somewhat concerned. "Well, I don't think that-"

"Now hold on a second!" said Shirley. "Light said we needed to stay put-"

"Then catch me if you can!" The magical girl took a running leap out the window in full view of the amazed crowd, with Shirley leaping after her, trying to grab Sayaka before she got herself killed.

She succeeded to a certain extent, managing to clutch Sayaka's body in her arms, but Shirley failed at stopping herself from falling out the observation deck and landing on the same edge of the tower that Lightning had grinded down. Not wanting to experience first-hand the agony of a 500 pound-plus metal body carrying a child crashing into pavement at terminal velocity, Shirley made every effort to stay balanced, ultimately giving the impression that she was running down the side of the tower. A soon as they had reached the ground, Shirley came to a screeching halt in front a Hawaiian-shirted tourist who had decided to videotape the whole thing.

"That. Was. AWESOME!" Sayaka threw her hands into the air, accidently sending Shirley tumbling over. Sayaka, however, just got up and started running after Lightning shouting "Thanks, Girlborg! I owe you one!" in her wake.

"Wait..." Shirley panted, "wait up..." she then began to jog after Sayaka.

Meanwhile, back at the tower, Madoka and Shinji looked at each other in confusion.

"...how about we take the elevator?" suggested Madoka.

Shinji nodded in agreement.

* * *

"...with all due respect, sir, this is a missing persons case." Detective Keiichi Ikari looked incredulously at Chief Sonoda as they walked down the hallway. "Isn't this a few orders of magnitude below what the Cataclysm Department would handle?" Ikari's partner looked at him with envy; Keiichi had long ago mastered the delicate art of questioning superior officers without getting fired.

"Budget cuts." said the Chief. "Some politician figured the Metahuman Crimes Division was sitting around twiddling their thumbs while vigilantes did all their work for them. So of course all work they did have gets pushed over to the most overworked department in Tokyo."

"Tragic."

"You don't know the half of it..." Sonoda placed his palm on his forehead. "And it's not just 'some missing person case', because I wouldn't be here if it was." he leafed through a manilla envelope full of redacted data. "Apparently this "Hope" girl's the adoptive daughter of some big-shot CIA spook. Apparently she broke into some retired mad scientist's house to "borrow" a teleporter he'd been working on."

"Did his name happen to be something like 'Dr. Insano'?" Ikari's eyes glazed over.

"Good guess." Sonoda's made a joyless lifeless smirk. "That name turned out to be the only thing that wasn't a complete fabrication. In reality, neither Batman nor Insano ever came within a hundred feet of each other, though we only have the latter's word to go on."

"Given that he's still alive, I'd say that's a safe bet." Ikari looked at his notes. "Had she been bugging this "Insano" guy before?"

"Actually, no. They were apparently on good terms, and she had acted as a lab assistant for the past couple months. Probably learned how to use the teleporter there, though that doesn't explain her choice of destination..."

"Well, she did say she wanted to go to Sternbild." quipped Maniwa. "Maybe she put in the wrong coordinates?"

"That's the working theory." Sonoda's eyelids drooped as they entered the room full of jail cells. "In any case, I need you and Ikari to help with the drop-off. It should be simple; we just need to take her to the airport, where an escort will be waiting to-"

But when they finally opened the door to the cell, Hope was nowhere to be found. Instead, there was a big gaping hole in the cell wall, surrounded by dozens of scratch marks.

"...DAMN IT." The chief pulled his radio from his holster, and set it to the local frequency. "This is Chief Sonoda of the Cataclysm Division. We have a 39-44, escaped metahuman child of variable appearance. I repeat, we have a 39-44, escaped metahuman child of variable appearance. Medium priority. Subject is dangerous, but not inherently violent." The chief then sighed.

Detective Maniwa began to say "Sorry about this, sir, I take complete responci-" before his partner shushed him.

"No, it's not your fault..." the chief grimaced. "It's those goddamn budget cuts again." he grumbled began to put on his jacket. "I say It would be a good idea to spring for titanium plating, but nooooo, 'nobody evertries to break out' they tell me. And then when somebody actually does they just slash the budget againbecause we're apparently not doing our jobs right-"

Maniwa coughed. "You wouldn't mind if we looked into this case, would you?" Ikari gave him a slight glare.

"By all means." Sonoda began to march out of the room. "We're allgoing to be in hot water if we don't find her."

* * *

From the safety of the public restroom, Hope tried desperately to come up with the perfect disguise.

On one hand, Hope couldn't make herself any taller, shorter, thinner or fatter, and had no control over her clothing. On the other hand, she had free reign over her skin, hair, and even facial features aside from the bright red tattoo on her forehead (which thankfully she could cover up with thick bangs or a hat). She shifted through few different forms to try and find one that would help her blend in, but every time it ended up looking less like an actual Japanese person and more like a caricature of one. So she tried some more exotic shapes. Catgirl, tengu, gorgon, martian, and countless others, Hope on tried every shape she could remember from her time on the TV Tropes Wiki. And she rejected every last one of these for reasons ranging from being really silly-looking to fear of pissing off the Martian Manhunter.

Eventually, Hope settled on something that looked vaguely like a Drow, with jet black skin, purple eyes, silky white hair going down to her knees, and a pair of milky white fangs because they looked cool. She was satisfied by her new form, finding it to be both attention grabbing and completely unlike her true self. And since Elves weren't actually real (Well okay aside from Santa's elves BUT THEY DON'T COUNT), no one could call her bluff for not being a cold-blooded sociopath like Drow are supposed to be. But the best part was that if anyone asked about how she got her powers, she could just say "A wizard did it!" and leave it at that.

Her clothing was still a dead giveaway, but her outfit was generic enough that simply wearing her "Wild Tiger" T-Shirt inside-out would be more than enough to fool a casual observer. True, it was still nothing like one would expect an Elf to wear, but she assumed a proper costume would come later; something purple and green, with spikey bits that- oh wait no spikey bits that would be hard to move in.

Well it didn't matter. The point was that Hope was ready to show the world what she could do.

She exited the bathroom with some modicum of grace, and stepped into what she assumed was the line to the interview table. She didn't know for certain, however, because the rivals standing in line all towered over her diminutive frame.

Wanting to get a better view, she extended her claws and used them to climb up a huge man wearing a bronze-plated football uniform, taking care not to dig in deep enough to actually hurt him.

"[Hey!]" a gruff voice shouted as the football player swiveled his head to face Hope. "[Whaddya think yer doin, pipsqueak?]"

Hope had no idea what he actually said, but she got the general idea. Frightened, she leapt from his shoulder onto guy who was dressed like a giant tree, and then rolled onto the ground when a stray branch came flying at her. From there, she crawled on her elbows and knees, secret agent style. At least up until the point that a nerdy guy wearing a viking helmet took just the wrong moment to drop his warhammer head-first right on top of Hope. She squirmed in discomfort as her spine snapped and reassembled itself over and over again. Luckily the faux-viking was a good sport, being kind enough to let Hope cut in line as an apology for almost-but-not-really killing her.

This brought Hope close enough to the front that the wait was almost bearable, though of course it still took a good thirty minutes or so. She instantly regretted leaving her game-filled cellphone back at home, but then reminded herself that dad could probably track her through the phone lines or something. And she couldn't afford to take any chances, not when she was this close to joining a real-life superhero team.

Sure, maybe it wouldn't have been as cool as teaming up with Wild Tiger, but even Hope admitted this was a bit of a stretch. Despite her confidence back at the police station, she had no idea if Tiger would even take a sidekick in the first place what with that new partner of his. She grinded her teeth just thinking about Barnaby Brooks Jr., that smug bastard...

"Next...?"

Suddenly, as a man wearing nothing but swim trunks and a jellyfish on his head walked away sobbing, Hope realized that there was no one else in front of her.

Better yet, the tired old geezer conducting the interviews was being tagged out for a blue-haired man with a blue jacket and a drill-shaped Necklace. Simon, she thought his name was.

The judge sitting next to him didn't look half-bad either; given how bubbly the blue-haired woman with the weird eyes looked, she was probably easy to impress.

It was the last guy that concerned her. A teenage boy with purple eyes and a face obscured by a domino mask, wearing an Allan Scott costume. It looked like she would have to go all out if she wanted to get a positive review from him.

Simon is the first to speak up. "So, whaddya call yourself?" he said.

Hope facepalmed. "[AAAGH THE LANGUAGE BARRIER I COMPLETELY FORGOT MY GOD THIS WAS DUUUUUMB.]"

"[...do you speak English?]" the teenage boy said.

Her hands still on her face, Hope spread out two of her fingers so she should get a good look at him. "[Uh... yes. Yes I do.]" she said. "[I... don't speak Japanese.]"

"[That's okay, most people in Japan at least know a bit of English.]" the woman smiled. "[So, what's your name?]"

Somewhat more confident, Hope opened her mouth to speak, but was then cut off as a hail of shuriken flew over her head and embedded themselves in the table in front of her.

Thinking quickly, Hope turned around and saw a tall man in blue tights, wearing a scaled blue chestpiece, with bright yellow shoulderpads and matching yellow gauntlets. But it was the unusual mask he wore that Hope's eyes were drawn to; split down the middle it was black on the left side, Yellow on the right, and lacking entirely in features save for a rough contour of his face, and a singular eye on the right.

Back at the booth, a purple haired teen in a cheap batman costume (complete with fake muscles) rushed over to the table. "Oh my god!" he said. "That's Deathstroke the Terminator! He's like, one of the world's biggest badasses!" he then began to make a series of awkward poses out of a combination of both fear of astonishment. "He can think, like, nine times faster than normal, run at least thirty miles an hour, and knows every form of combat known to man."

"Including a few I've made up myself." Deathstroke bragged. He then cracked his knuckles. "Now look, I'll make this easy on you. Hand over the boy and I'll let you walk away from all this. Otherwise..."

Suddenly, the fake viking burst out the crowd to charge at Deathstroke, hammer held high. "Never fear, citizens!" he cried, "Super Cosmic Viking Man is here to save the-"

He didn't even get the chance to finish, as Deathstroke pulled unheated a worn longsword and stabbed Super Cosmic Viking Man through his unprotected stomach. The would-be hero froze in place for a moment, before limply sliding off the blade and falling to the floor.

Deathstroke glared at the crowd behind him. "Any of you jokers try to pull something like that, and next time I'll TRY to aim for a vital organ."

Simon, pounded the table with fist. "Yeah, well, if you want to get to Shinji, you need to get through us!"

Deathstroke raised an eyebrow. "Shinji? Who the hell is that?" he said. He then drew a second blade and pointed it at the teenage judge, much to his surprise. "That's who I'm looking for. Him and his kid sister."

"Lelouch?" said Rivalz, looking at his friend with a worried expression. "What do you want him for?"

"Lets just say his father has a few choice words for them, and leave it at that."

Lelouch glared at Rivalz. "We'll talk about this later. Rolo, NOW!"

...and in the blink of an eye, Lelouch vanished.

Deathstroke looked around fruitlessly.

"Very clever..." he said. He then raised upholstered a submachine gun, and fired it into the air. "ALLRIGHT, LISTEN UP!" He shouted. "I GAVE YOU A CHANCE TO COME PEACEFULLY, BUT I'M THROUGH PLAYING NICE."

Hope ducked as Deathstroke fired off a clip into the crowd of heroes, striking down dozens of heroes where they stood.

"YOU HAVE FIVE MINUTES TO SHOW YOURSELF, LAMPEROGUE, OR ELSE EVERYONE FUCKING DIES." A mechanical sound was heard as he reloaded his machine gun, and then immediately fired it at a green-arrow imitator who had yet to master the art of the quick-draw. "AND ANY WISE GUY WHO THINKS THEY CAN TAKE A CHEAP SHOT WHEN MY BACK IS TURNED GETS TO GO FIRST. YOU UNDERSTAND?"

The crowd remained silent. Not one dared make a move, in fear of pissing off merc with an itchy trigger finger.

Suddenly, Hope found herself snatched up by something very cold and metallic as the Lagann grabbed her with one hand, and charged at Deathstroke with the other. The appendage then transformed into a giant drill, leaving Deathstroke only a split-second to roll out of the way.

But Simon kept going until he was right in front of the crowd, whereupon he retraced the drill, and carefully placed Hope onto the grass.

"[You okay?]" A voice came from the robot, which Hope immediately realized belong to Simon.

"[Well, yeah but-]"

"[Good!]" Simon's robot gave Hope a thumbs-up. "[We're going to need all the help we can get!]"

Realizing that Simon had just asked for her help, Hope returned with her own thumbs-up, followed by a toothy, fang-exposing grin.

The cockpit of the Laggan then opened itself up, revealing Simon to the world. "Listen up, Deathstroke!" He stood on his chair, and put his foot on the rim of his mech. "You might think you can bully us around, just because you've got a lot of guns..."

"And swords." said the guy dressed like a tree.

"And training." said the football player.

Back at the booth, Rivalz continued to count up Deathstroke's advantages in front of Nia. "And super reflexes, enhanced senses, regeneration..."

"...So you've got a lot of stuff! Big deal!" said Simon, "But we have something that you don't!"

"Stupidity?" said Deathstroke.

"Noble hearts dedicated to justice!" Simon pumped his fist, and then pointed it at the mercenary. "And with our noble hearts, we're going to make a drill... of justice!" He then extended his index finger to point straight forward, and then he raised his hand to point up in the air. "And this drill will pierce through the vault of heaven, and lead us to a better tomorrow! A tomorrow free of fear, where we can live out our dreams in mutual harmony! A harmony that will last till the end of-"

"I don't have time for this." Without even bothering to aim, Deathstroke pointed his gun at Simon, and fired off an entire clip of bullets before Simon even had a chance to blink.

But rather than the sensation of led perforating his skull, Simon instead found a shell of glowing red hexagons suddenly blink into being, accompanied by the sound not unlike a nuclear reactor running at full blast.

"Simon! We've got your back!" Simon turned to the side, and saw Shulk and Shirou standing among the crowd, decked out in medieval plate armor, Shulk raising the The Monado above his head, and Shirou readying a wooden crossbow.

"Good save!" Said Simon. "I didn't even know you could do that!"

"Neither did I until three seconds ago." said Shulk. "You see I had this vision where Deathstroke killed you in the middle of a rousing speech by shooting you through the heart. I didn't want to alarm you, so I got Emyia to trace up something that could protect you. But we couldn't give it to you in time so I-"

...and just as suddenly as it appeared, the shield blinked out of existence.

"...Maybe we should talk about this later." said Shirou.

"Agreed." said Shulk.

A smirk spread over Simon's face. "Well, that's what we get for monologuing."

He then jumped back into the Lagann, and closed the cockpit, and once again the Lagann began speaking for him. "Allright, in that case I'll keep it quick. You want to know who the hell we are?! WE'RE THE JUSTICE SOCIETY OF JAPAN, AND THAT'S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW!"

All the while, Hope watched the whole thing unfold with childlike glee. Even if she didn't understand a word of what was being said, she could practically taste emotion floating through the air. It was like watching a superhero cartoon come to life, but with better costumes and worse acting! And she was right there in the thick of it!

Even if her father were to show up right then and there to drag her back to Florida, Hope knew that this was a trip well spent.

* * *

A girl ran through the streets of Tokyo. She didn't know why, exactly, but her instincts told her that when a girl wearing golden armor jumps from the top of a metal spire, lands hard enough to make a crater, and then immediately starts chasing after you, the safest thing to do was run away as quickly as possible.

There were actually quite a lot of things the girl didn't know, actually. Her own name, for one thing. Followed by who she was, where she was, and how she got here. She did know what she looked like, at least. She remembered seeing a... shiny glass thing that you can see yourself in. She could clearly remember seeing one of those before. What are they called again?

Well, whatever it was there certainly wasn't time to think. The gold-plated-girl was hot on her heels, showing a surprising amount of grace for wearing something that looks so heavy.

The girl then looked down at her own clothing. It was black. Very black. And quite shiny, like it was made from very fine stuff she couldn't quite remember the name of that is made of from the skin of those big animals she couldn't quite remember the name of that live on that place she couldn't quite remember the name of that also make that white beverage she couldn't quite remember the name of.

The girl makes a mental note to get this missing-memory thing sorted out as soon as humanly possible.

As for the rest of her outfit, it seems to be dominated by an enormous zipper that seems to run the length of it. The girl notes the irony of knowing what a "zipper" is despite being unable to put a name to more commonplace things. She also notes the presence of a pair of high-heeled boots on her feet, thinks to herself "no wonder I've been having so much trouble running" and kicks them off the very next moment. This turns out to be a mistake, however, as she suddenly remembers why people wear shoes in the first place. Specifically, she learns why they wear shoes while running on the pavement in ninety degree weather.

"GAH!" she yelps. But with the gold-plated-girl chasing after her, she has no choice but to press onward, so she splits off of the road and runs towards some kind of... green place that was walled off from the outside world by a chain-link fence. A freestanding net sat on top of a rectangular pattern painted out of white lines, both of which the girl puzzled over the purpose of.

Still, the girl knew an opportunity when she saw it, so she ducked through a gate and shut it behind her with some kind of lock. She then walked away from the gate, taking a moment to catch her breath. She was confident that the gold-plated-girl wouldn't be able to follower her through...

...only to turn around in shock as the sound of a long, golden blade cut through the gate like melted butter. "Trapped like a rat in a cage, aren't we?" The gold-plated-girl wore a smug smile as she approached. "It's almost pathetic enough to make me laugh... but a heroine needs to be humble, after all." She twirled her blade between in her hands.

Just then, a new voice rang out. "Electra!" it said, and soon a pink-haired woman wearing a white jacket and a red scarf lept between the girl and her gold-plated stalker. "What's going on here?"

"Ah, Lightning! Good of you to come." the gold-plated-girl (apparently known as "Electra") pointed at the girl. "I had just finished tracking down this undesirable, and was about to put an end to her life."

The girl gasped, and took a step back; her worst fears had been confirmed.

"...that's nothow we do things." the woman known as "Lightning" glared at her companion. "We don't murder criminals. Especially when they haven't done anything."

"Murder is such a strong word." her expression unchanging, Electra flipped her hair back. "Royalty doesn't commit murder. We perform executions."

"It doesn't matter what you call it. Maybe they don't have this where you come from, but in our time we have something called 'due process'..."

"Oh? Are you willing to die for your so-called 'due process'?" Electra reached behind her cape, and pulled out a gold-plated sextant (the girl, of course, didn't know what a sextant actually did, but somehow she still knew what it was called). "The Apoco-Scope identifies her as one of the seven people who will bring about the end of the world! She must be destroyed before that happens!"

"Why? What exactly did this girl do to deserve to be hunted down like a wild animal?"

"Well I... don't quite know that. The end of the world wasn't so much a singular event as much as it was a series of seemingly unrelated disasters." Electa pointed to the Apoco-Scope again. "But the Apoco-Scope says it, so it must be true!"

"...You're expecting me to believe that you're passing snap judgements based on a fortune telling tool that might not even work?" Lightning pulled her weapon off her belt. "Are you crazy?"

"A better question is, are you blind?!" Electra screamed. "Just look at her jacket; it's the same kind that the members Organization XIII wore!"

"You've either been living under a rock, or you really are from the future. Those jackets were extremely popular a few years ago. My sister has one. Her fiance has one. Even I have one. Does that mean we're members, too?"

"...you COULD be..." she looked away from Lightning, and towards her own weapon. "I can't quite discount that possibility just yet..."

Thinking the pair were too busy bickering to give chase, the girl made a break for it. But just as it looked like she was out of range, she felt a sharp, stabbing pain in her thigh, which seized up and caused her to fall over. Looking at the source of the pain, she saw a Gold-plated knife sticking out of the back of her leg. She tried to pull it out, but when she reached for it the knife immediately lost it's luster, turning into what appeared to be an ordinary knife-for-place-where-you-make-food. The knife then made a noise that the girl would probably compare to crumpling tinfoil if she knew what that tinfoil was, and a series of cracks began to form. Before she knew it the knife had fallen apart into a pile of iron scraps. While it did get the knife out, it also caused her wound to bleed profusely, which somehow hurt even more than simply having a piece of metal stuck in it.

The girl then looked back up at the others. As she sat on the floor nursing her own wound, Lightning and Electra had launched into combat. Electra fought with all manner of weapons, from glowing swords and magical maces to some kind of metal tube that made a loud noise when she squeezed it. And all of her weapons were extremely ornate, as they were exclusively fashioned out precious metals and gems, to the point where it eventually got to be a bit silly. After all, how practical is a flail with a giant ruby on the end, exactly?

She swung hard and swung wide, but despite her boasting Electra's blows were clumsy enough that she would occasionally drop her weapon. And whenever she did, the weapon would instantly take on a less opulent form and then fall to pieces just like the knife had.

Apparently the girl wasn't the only one who noticed this, as the first time it happened it gave Lightning pause. "What are you, Bizzaro-King Midas or something?"

"Don't associate me with that pretender!" the girl screamed. "An ounce of my blood is worth more than a gallon of his!"

In contrast to Electra, Lightning's combat style had a graceful rhythm to it. True, she also swung wide, but she was fast enough that whenever an opponent tried to exploit what appeared to be an opening, Lightning dodged it and immediately made a counter-attack. And while Electra herself left openings whenever she tried to change weapons, Lightning was able to switch from gun to sword to magic without skipping a beat.

It was funny. It probably took years to learn how to fight that well, but seeing it in motion it all looked so easy...

Just then, more newcomers entered the battle! One was a blue-haired girl with a blue chestplate, and the other was a somewhat older, orange-haired girl with two pink, transparent antenna sticking out the side of her head, who was also wearing a silly costume.

"Hey Light! What's going on! Why 'ya fighting golden girl?"

"Sayaka, I thought I told you to-" Lightning leaned to the side to dodge an incoming sword thrust. "Nevermind. That girl over there is injured." she ducked to avoid a swipe at her head. "Heal her up, and get her to safety. Girlborg, you go too. We don't know who she's working for."

Sayaka (the blue-haired girl) returned a salute as she rushed towards the nameless girl's aid. "You got it, boss!" she charged straight through the fight, sliding as she passed Electra to avoid being struck, and then rolled up to her destination.

She rubbed her hands together. "Allright, let's see what we can do here..." She pushed the girl's jacket aside in order to get a good look at the wound. She then held out her hands, and a faint blue light began to emanate from them.

But rather than closing up, the area around the gash began to glow with a sickly, black light, accompanied by a faint ringing.

Sayaka poked at the wound, bloodying her finger when she found it to still be there. "Well that's weird." she looked at the girl. "I don't suppose you know anything about this?"

"Um... not really." she replied. "Sorry."

"Right then." Sayaka then picked her up, and held the girl over her shoulder. "Hey Lightning! It's not working!"

"What'snot working?" at this point Lightning had disarmed Electra completely, leaving her to flail her fists helplessly in Lightning's direction as Light held Electra's face back at arm's length.

"My healing magic! It's not doin' a darn thing!"

"...Great." Lightning clobbered Electra with a punch to the face, and tossed one of her own healing spells in the nameless girl's direction. Unfortunately, this had much the same result; same ringing, same blacklight, same lack of progress.

"She's probably immune to magic." Lightning said. She then bent down to pick up the girl, first grabbing her by the hand. "I'll get her to a hospital. You two finish up the fight with miss high-and-"

But the moment she touched the Girl, the air filled with an intense ringing. Starting from the point of contact, the girl's arm lit up with the same black light energy that appeared when they tried to heal her. The girl panicked, and tried to break free of Lightning's grasp, but even if she wanted to Light found herself stiffening, and unable to let go. Then, just as suddenly, she went limp, and collapsed right next to the girl she was trying to rescue.

The remaining heroines looked at their fallen ally's body.

"So. now what?" Sayaka looked at Girlborg expectantly.

"I..." Girlborg glanced at Electra, who was now recovering from her blow. "...I think we should run."

* * *

There was a rumor that Deathstroke once beat the Justice League single-handedly, back during a time where they had over a dozen members.

But whether this was true or not, it was clear that he was having trouble with the hundred-plus E-List heroes that were now swarming him en masse.

"Eat treebark, ruffian!"

"Hut hut, HIKE!"

"Go for the eyes, Hamtaro! GO FOR THE EYES!"

True, they all had dumb costumes, dumb powers, and most fainted at the sight of their own blood, but he had to give the japs some credit; they can be a real a vicious pack of bastards when they want to. Fighting a group of heroes he didn't know a damn thing about. It was arguably more difficult than having to fight a trained men, or even a group of A-listers, because at least with someone like Green Lantern you have a reasonable idea of what to expect. This was anarchy at it's finest.

"Prepare to face the wrath of THE SALARYMAN!"

"This one's for Super Cosmic Viking Man!"

"Don't give up now! We've got him on the ropes."

Deathstroke turned his attention to that last voice. He knew that somewhere, Simon was hiding safely in his mech, commanding his own private army through motivational speeches. "Cut off the head, and the rest of the body shrivels up..." Deathstroke mused as pushed through the crowd of attackers until he finally came across Shulk. "...and what better way to expose the neck than with a poke in the eye?"

Though he rarely took stock in magic, Deathstroke knew that The Monado was useless against humans. With this in mind, he pounced into Shulk, grabbed him by the throat, and shoved him into the grass face-first.

"I bet you feel real smart right about now, kid." Deathstroke said. "You probably wish your so-called 'leader' wasn't so much of a coward..."

"You got it all wrong, Deathstroke!"

Deathstroke paused. He could clearly hear Simon's voice, but he had no idea where it was actually coming from.

"I wasn't hiding from you; you were the one hiding from ME!"

A giant drill then sprouted out of the ground, right where Deathstroke was standing. He let go of Shulk and tried to leap away, but his footing was already compromised so it was less than effective than anticipated.

Worse yet, Simon seemed to have anticipated this, as the drill then changed directions to point away from Shulk and towards Deathstroke, and lept out of the ground like a trained dolphin. The drill then transformed back into the Lagann, which wound up its fist for what looked like a mighty blow.

But even the mighty Lagann was too steps behind Deathstroke. Calculating the angle of the robot's descent and the most likely arc of its blow, he took one step back, pulled out his sword, and held it straight out.

Gravity did the rest of the work for him. Being unable to change it's course, the Lagann impaled itself on Deathstroke's weapon, its arm freezing mid-swing, just inches away from its target.

"Pathetic." Deathstroke let go of his longsword, plopping the mech on the ground with an unceremonious *thump*. He looked around to admire his handiwork. Where there was once a zealous mob of vigilantes, there was now only a roughed-up gang of rookies shitting their pants.

"Well, I can't say it wasn't interesting while it lasted..." Deathstroke pulled his sword out of the broken mech. "Now if you excuse me, I have a pair of kids to-"

Deathstroke froze. There was no blood on this sword.

His mind ran through all the possibilities. Perhaps he had missed. Perhaps the robot was on remote control. Perhaps he teleported out of the way just in time. Perhaps it was a hologram. Perhaps Simon didn't bleed at all...

...but the one thing Deathstroke DIDN'T expect was for Simon, a man with no powers and no fancy gadgets aside from his mech, to use his robot's mass to launch himself high into the air, and then punch Deathstroke on the way down.

The last thing Deathstroke heard before he blacked out (aside from the sound of breaking bones) was the following conversation:

"...you cut it a bit close there." said Shulk. "My visions can't predict everything you know."

"Well you saw enough, at least." replied Simon, "I mean if you hadn't told me the exact spot he'd attack you we would have- ERK!"

"Um... how hard did you hit him, exactly?"

"Oh, don't worry (ow), it's just a (erk) broken bone or two... or three." There was another thump as Simon collapsed onto the grass. "Don't... worry... so... much..."

"Oh bugger. Shirou, get Lightning; she can repair the damage far better than I can. I'll get Nia to set the bones so he doesn't get any worse."

And then, with his brain hemorrhaging faster than his healing factor could fix it, Deathstroke passed out.

* * *

The girl watched helplessly as the two heroines dashed down the hallway of the building they had broken into, each struggling to carry someone larger than themselves. The girl herself was being carried by the one called Sayaka, while Lightning was being carried by the one known as Girlborg.

Behind them, Electra continued to give chase. The twisting brickwork hallways did little to deter her pursuit. Rather, it only seemed to aggravate her further, as she began firing at them with a silver revolver. Her aim was poor, but given how the gun was apparently firing rounds that left SUV-sized craters in the walls, it was immediately clear that actually aiming was never a top priority.

"WHAT DO WE DO NOW!?" said Sayaka.

"I DON'T KNOW!" said Girlborg.

"AREN'T YOU IN CHARGE?! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KNOW!"

"I ONLY TOOK THIS JOB BECAUSE I WANTED TO IMPRESS A BOY I LIKE!"

"THAT'S A TERRIBLE REASON BUT I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY!"

"THANKS!"

Sayaka then turned her head as if she were listening to an invisible presence sitting on her shoulder. "YEAH, GOOD IDEA, LETS DO THAT."

When they rounded the next corner, the pair ducked into a supply closet full of sporting equipment. Shirley tripped over a sack of sporting equipment as she entered, dropping Lightning like a limp rag-doll.

She then got on her knees and pointed at a blank wall. "W- What is that thing?" she said.

"It's a Barrier. It a portal to where a Witch and her familiars live." said Sayaka.

The still-nameless girl expected that there was a more explanation forthcoming, but if there was, then it seemed to come from a seemingly-ordinary spot on the floor.

Finally, Sayaka spoke out. "Wait, so your plan is that we just run from one fight into another? That girl could be killing people while we're gone!" Another pause. The presence seemed to be in another spot entirely. "Yeah, well, that's still not fair!" she added. "Just because the Witch kills more doesn't mean we can let them both off the hook."

The girl raised her hand. "...what's goin on here? Who are you guys talking to?"

Sayaka looked at the girl, and then looked back at the floor. "Hey Kyubey, you think you could let her see what's going on just for a sec?"

A psychic voice rang out in the girl's head. "Oh! Sorry about that."

Suddenly, a large, glowing glyph appeared on the wall. It appeared to be shaped like a neon-green baseball diamond (another pointless thing the girl was surprised that she recognized), with the lines between bases replaced by a string of incomprehensible symbols moving in a counter-clockwise direction. A faint cheering sound emanated from it, accompanied by high-pitched, mechanical organ music.

"There. Better now?"

"Uh..." the girl looked down at the formerly empty spot on the ground. It was now occupied by what looked like a cross between a cat, a weasel, and a bunny rabbit. "...I don't know."

"Ah, good! you can hear me!"it said. Or at least, gave the impression that it said something, since it's mouth didn't move at all. "I was worried for a moment there that you'd also be anti-psionic, but it seems my powers work just fine!"

"...What?"

"Okay, I'll make this quick:" Sayaka pointed at the rabbity thing. "This is Kyubey." she pointed at herself. "I'm a magical girl." finally she pointed at the glyph. "And that's a Barrier, and there's a thing called a Witch inside that eats people." She then pointed back at Kyubey, back at herself, then back at the Barrier. "Kuybey gave me powers to fight Witches. Understand?"

"...sort of?"

Shirley looked at the Barrier thoughtfully.

"Great!" said Sayaka. "Now I don't suppose you have a plan, do you?"

"...not really." said the girl. "I don't even know my own name, to be honest."

"Classic amnesia."said Kyubey. "I'd offer you a Contract so you could wish to fix it, but honestly I'm not sure it would work. And even if it did, it would probably be more prudent to wish for something to help you out of this situation, like a healing factor, or immortality, or-"

It was then that girlborg spoke up. "Guys... I think I have a plan." she looked at the Barrier. "How hard is it to get out of one of those things?"

"Almost impossible for anyone other than a magical girl. Only a magical girl can enter and leave whenever she wants, but anyone else needs to defeat the Witch and wait for the Labyrinth to collapse."

"Well... in that case..." Girlborg bent down to talk to Kyubey. "Do you think you could let her see the Barrier, too? If we could trick her into entering, then leave before she-"

Just then, a golden blade pierced through the front of the door. "OPEN UP!" Electra shouted from the other side. "OPEN UP THIS INSTANT OR I'LL SKEWER THE LOT OF YOU!"

"I think I know where you're going with this." said Kyubey. "Consider it done!"

* * *

With a mighty heave Electra Pendragon kicked down the door that she swore those mongrels had entered moments before, only to find herself staring at a messy closet full of sporting equipment. Nothing seemed to be out of the ordinary, save for a large, glowing glyph shaped like a neon-green baseball diamond. Which admittedly was pretty damn weird. But given that the most famous heroes of the era were a man dressed like a bat and an alien who flew around in his long johns, it wasn't terribly surprising, either.

"One of those plebeians must have some kind of... dimensional portal power."she mused.  
After poking around to see if they weren't trying something stupid like hiding behind the door or on the ceiling, she went up to the glyph to examine the writing on the diamond. She didn't understand the language, but even so she understood that it read "TAKE ME OUT TO THE BALL-GAME, TAKE ME OUT TO THE CROWD, BUY ME SOME PEANUTS AND CRACKER JACK, I DON'T CARE IF I EVER GET BACK" over and over again in an endless loop.

"Of course." Electra said to noone in particular. "It's obvious that portal must lead straight to the baseball dimension." she sighed. "The Baseball Dimension. Really now? The oddities of this era never cease to amaze..."

Electra looked around for a baseball bat, just in case it turned out that it would be a good idea to have one. She ended up taking three; one genuine Louisville Slugger that was probably used for "official" games, and two aluminum bats used during P.E. She took a few experimental swings, before finally deciding to use her power. The aluminum bats took on the appearance of fine damascus steel, featuring organic ripples that appeared to ooze raw power. The wooden bat, meanwhile just changed color from the stark white of maplewood to a fine mahogany brown.

"Hmph. Commoners' tools for a commoners' sport." she glowered at the Louisville bat. "Don't look so smug. I'll be rid of you for good once this particular trial comes to an end."

Without any further hesitation, Electra stepped through the portal, and predictably, found herself in a baseball stadium. An empty frame of a baseball stadium that was ten times larger than usual, constructed out of neon green girders held together by duct tape, and had an empty void in place of a field, but it was a baseball stadium nonetheless. Cheering and organ music could be heard from the stands, but the crowd was either invisible or not present to begin with.

In the direction of first base, Electra could see her target; a young, black-haired girl of vaguely asiatic descent, who may or may not have been an Organization XIII member but was clearly up to no good. After all, look how they're waiting hand and feet on her, taking care of her even though she clearly hurt their comrade. Electra figured that the girl had some kind of mind control in place.

"In fact, I bet they'll thank me once I kill her and free them from her grasp." Electra thought. "And if they don't... well, I could always stand to perform a few more executions."

She approached the group, weapons drawn. As she got nearer, she was able to pick up snippets of conversation.

"...so wait, someone's been stealing Witches?" said the orange-haired girl with the stupid costume.

"Yeah, Mami was telling me about it just the other day. It's pretty weird running into all these empty Labyrinths.." said the blue-haired girl with the somewhat less stupid costume. "She thinks someone might be trying to breed them or something."

"Why?"

"I dunno. Infinite grief seeds? World domination? Science? Take your pick."

"But how?"

"Who knows? But apparently everyone's trying to find out, expecting to end up with a huge cache of grief seeds."

"What's a grief seed?" said the nameless girl.

"Oy, do I need to explain this all again? A Grief Seed is-"

"-AHEM." Electra stomped her foot on the metal she was crossing to get everyone's attention. Something that they quickly obliged to.

"Oh. right." Sayaka grimaced. "I almost forgot." She formed a cone with her hands, put them up to her mouth, and shouted "HEY MORON. GOOD JOB FALLING INTO OUR TRAP!"

"Moron?!" Electra's face turned red. "You DARE call ME a moron?!" she pulled out her revolver once again, and aimed down the barrel at Sayaka. "You should know better than to antagonized a member of royalty when she possesses deadly firearms!"

"I wouldn't do that if I were you."said a voice from seemingly nowhere. "With no Witch to kill, the only way you're going to get out of here is with a Puella Magi's help."

Electra looked around for the voice's source. "Where are you? Show yourself!"

"No."replied the voice. "If I did that you would just shoot me. Which, by the way, would accomplish nothing. Though I doubt you'd listen to reason on this matter."

"Kyubey's right." said Girlborg. "Violence isn't going to help here. Why don't you put down the gun, and we'll make some sort of deal?"

"You dimwitted ignoramuses!" Electra practically began to foam at the mouth. "Don't you see that we're on the same side here!? That girl is all that stands between us and planetary annihilation!"

"Well the thing is..." Shirley held her fingers together. "...even if that was true, you're not doing a very good job of convincing us."

"I don't need to convince you! I'm royalty! Why shouldn't you be listening to me?!"

Sayaka responded by counting on her fingers. "Well one, we live in a democracy. Two, if you are from the future you probably haven't been born yet so you have no right to rule. And three, you're just kind of an asshole. How do we know your 'end of the world' isn't just something stupid like 'my dad gets thrown out by an angry mob so I went back in time to change that'?"

"How DARE you say such slanderous things about my father! He would NEVER allow that to happen!" she huffed. "And besides, the Apoco-Scope is infallible on such matters!"

"Oh yeah?" Sayaka jeered. "Well what does it say about us?"

Electra pulled the sextant from her belt. "Well I'll tell you what it says! It says..." she left that last word hanging as she looked through the scope. And then she remained silent as she looked through the scope again, this time to confirm that she wasn't seeing things. Though the scope, the three conscious girls had thick, yellow outlines, and a HUD element said "Keystones Acquired: Eliminate to Negate Timeline" above their heads.

"You bastards..." she snarled as she put down the device. "...no wonder you defend this girl you've never seen before! The three of you are in this together!"

"No, that's not it!" said Girlborg, "We just want to save her from-"

"THE APOCO-SCOPE SEES THROUGH YOUR LIES!" With two baseball bats drawn like swords, Electra charged with extreme ferocity.

"Um... TACTICAL RETREAT!" Shirley grabbed Lightning and started rounding the bases in an attempt to get back to home plate.

Sayaka tried to do likewise with the unnamed girl, but Electra threw her enchanted baseball bats with enough power to rupture the ground beneath her, leaving a huge gap in the path between first and second base. The unfortunate Puella Magi flying across the newly-created gap, and also trapped the girl she was trying to rescue on the other side. The side that Electra Pendragon was still standing on.

"Sayaka!" screamed Girlborg.

"I'm okay!" said Sayaka. "I'll be fine. But we need to save no-name!"

"Kyubey! You don't happen to have telekinesis, do you?"

"Nope. And before you ask, I don't think I'm allowed to make contracts with robots..."

"Ah, Okay then. Um..." Girlborg looked around. There wasn't anything in hand but the road they were on, which was constructed entirely out of...

"GIRDERS!" Girlborg said. "We'll make a see-saw out of Girders!" She began pulling one out of the ground with all of her cybernetic might. "If I hold one down, you think you can leap across?"

"I'll certainly try!" Sayaka pumped her fist in excitement. "Anything for Miss Nobody! Even if she is a literal Nobody! Which I'm still not sure of."

Meanwhile, on the other side, Electra was slowly walking towards the no-name girl.

"You won't believe the kind of day I've had this morning..." she growled. "First I end up in this backwater time period, THEN I get stuck in line for hours waiting for you morons to hear me out, THEN it turns out that everyone's moral compass prevents me from doing my JOB..." she took out the Louisville Slugger, and clasped it with both hands. "I think a commoner's tool would be suitable for a commoner'sdeath, don't you think?"

Her fight or flight response no doubt dulling the pain in her leg, the nameless girl searched desperately for a weapon to defend herself with. The closest thing she could find was a chunk of metal just below the edge of that looked just like it was about to fall off.

"Come on..." she thought as she reached out for it. Her hand didn't seem to be quite long enough. It looked like she could reach it if she leaned over, but she was too afraid of the void below to go too far.

"Well? What are you waiting for?" tease Electra. "Are you going to die pathetically, or will you at least put of a modicum of resistance?"

The girl looked back for a moment, and then closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, and she reached out to grab the shard. She heard something snap, and found herself holding something heavy or at least heavier than expected.

"No answer? Very well, then: BATTER UP!" Electra swung the bat in a downward motion towards the girl's head.

Instantly, she rolled onto her back to defend herself, trying to use the shard to parry the blow. But when she opened her eyes, she found she wasn't holding a shard at all. Rather, she appeared to be holding a giant... Key?

"Fascinating!"said Kyubey. "Is that an actual Keyblade? It must be. Otherwise I would have detected it by now."

"What's a Keyblade?" said Girlborg, who had just gotten the Girder in position.

"A mystic weapon from long ago that had recently resurfaced in the hands of a young boy named Sora. Though I'm wondering how this girl acquired such a thing? Could more have been left over from the Keyblade war, that are only now just awakening? Or perhaps-"

"SHUT UP I'M TRYING TO FOCUS HERE." Electra hammered away at the girl with her baseball bat, but each and every one of her attacks were parried by the girl, who suddenly seemed to be moving much more deftly than a few minutes ago.

"And what's more, you seem to be copying Farron's exact fighting style after having seen it for a few seconds. Most peculiar. Perhaps you have a meta-gene that records the exact sequence of neurons needed to-"

"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!" Electra screamed, her attacks growing more erratic with each passing second.

"No, keep going!" said Sayaka, who was now getting into position herself. "Keep talking about her brain! Keep her angry!"

"...very well then. In addition to a possible metagene, the girl must have extreme neuroplasticity in order to react unconsciously to-"

"I DON'T GET THIS AT ALL!" screamed the girl.

"Yes, well, science can be like that."said Kyubey. "Now, another possible theory is that-"

From her starting point, Sayaka took a running leap and landed on the other side just in time to block an incoming attack with her own blade. She then grabbed the unnamed girl, and started to run for home plate.

"COWARD!" Electra screamed, "COME BACK HERE AND FIGHT ME!". But enchanting all those weapons wore her out more than she realized, so she could only follow at a plodding pace.

Eventually, Girlborg (still carrying an unconscious Lightning) met up with her Sayaka, and together they passed back through the Barrier.

"PLEBEIANS! IMBECILES! PSYCHOPATHS!" Electra tried to escape through the barrier herself, but only ended up smacking herself in the face for her efforts. "You... YOU MONGRELS! How dare you leave me trapped in here! How dare you..." she then got down to her knees, and began to cry. "How... dare you..."

* * *

Back on the other side of the Barrier, Shirley and Sayaka congratulated each other on a job well done.

"Well, the villain's trapped, and our Jane Doe is safe." Sayaka slowly put the girl down. "I'd say this was a job well done!"

"Yeah..." Shirley looked at the Barrier. "...you're sure the other girl will be okay?"

"With the Witch gone, the place is cleared out of Familiars. I checked. And unless her swords can cut through dimensions, I'd say she's pretty safe where she is right now." Kyubey then looked at the newcomer. "So. You said you lost your memories, right?"

"...y-yes." said the girl. "At least, I think I did..."

"Well, I can't restore them without a Contract, but if you want I can do a deep scan of your brain and see what I can dredge up. Would that be good?"

"Yeah. I suppose so..." the girl began to rub her forehead. "This... won't hurt, will it?"

"Of course not! Now, let's see what we can find..."

Kyubey scampered into the girl's arms. She lifted him into the air, and she touched his head to hers, and closed his beady little eyes.

There was silence for a full minute, and everyone waited in eager anticipation for the result.

"...Interesting."

"Did you find anything?" the girl asked.

"Nothing of immediate concern."Kyubey responded. "But I got your name at least. It's very unusual, though."

"...well, what is it?" said Sayaka. "Don't keep us in the dark!"

"As best I can tell, her name is... 'Ino Atom Nix'."

The previously unnamed girl mouthed the words silently. "...are you sure that's right?"

"Positive!"said Kyubey. "It's my policy not to lie about anything."

"Well its just... kind of a weird name..." Ino scratched the back of her head.

"Hey, don't talk to me about dumb names." said Sayaka. "There's an teacher at my school who's called 'Pink Supervisor'. Compared to that, your name is practically normal."

"I guess." Ino looked around. "So, uh, what happens now?"

Shirley shrugged. "I guess whatever usually happens to mysterious girls with mysterious powers who also have amnesia."

"I mean with her." Ino pointed at Lightning, still out cold. "Is she going to be all right?"

Shirley bent down, and tried to take a pulse. "...yeah, I think so. Her heart's still beating, at least."

"Until then, I'd try to stay away from her until we figure out why that happened." Kyubey added.

"Either way, we need to get you guys to a hospital."

"Way ahead of you." Sayaka started dialing an emergency number on her cell phone. "Man, I bet the others wish they weren't stuck in that boring old park."

* * *

Despite budget cuts, the Tokyo Police Cataclysm Division's response to Deathstroke's attack was swift and decisive. Only minutes after the smoke cleared, a fleet of ambulances arrived to take away the dead, and give the injured proper medical treatment. Immediately following was a squad of police cars, accompanied by an armored car, and an armored SWAT team that would be on hand just in case Deathstroke woke up and tried to escape.

"...and you say you beat him by... punching him in the face?" Chief Sonoda looked at Simon with his trademark "been there, done that" expression.

"Well, actually it was the head and not the face. But yeah, that's more or less how it happened," despite being strapped down in his stretcher and in constant agony, Simon managed a weak chuckle. "I think I overestimated my ability to take a hit, but I did end the fight quickly..."

Sonoda retained his blank expression. "I see." he said, which, Simon recognized as a very polite way of saying "whatever". "Well if that's all you have to say, I suppose I'll be going now. Paperwork, you know."

"Okay. See ya." Simon said as the chief turned to leave, but Sonoda neither seemed to neither noticed nor care.

Suddenly, Simon heard a voice behind him. "Si-mon!" He turned and saw Nia, Lelouch, and Shulk waiting for him. "I heard about what happened! Are you alright?"

"What, this?" Simon motioned to his broken arm. "You know it'll take more than that to keep me down!"

"That, and we've got two healers." said Lelouch. "Speaking of which, I just got word from the others. Electra went bonkers and tried to murder everyone, Lightning's in the hospital, but the rest are fine."

"...that's good to hear." Simon nodded. "Nia, can you punch Lelouch for me?"

"...I've also heard that- wait, what?"

A split-second later, Nia's ladylike fist crashed into Lelouch's glass jaw, leaving him sprawled out on the grass.

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED BACK THERE?!" said Simon. "WHO THE HELL HIRED DEATHSTROKE!? WHY THE HELL DOES HE CARE ABOUT YOU AND YOUR SISTER SO MUCH!? HOW THE HELL DID YOU DISAPPEAR LIKE THAT?!"

"...I deserved that." said Lelouch.

"YOU DESERVE A LOT MORE! PEOPLE DIED TODAY BECAUSE OF YOUR LITTLE DISAPPEARING ACT! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?!"

"First of all, stop shouting." Lelouch wiped some of the blood off his lips. "Second, my family life is immensely complicated. I have dozens of half-siblings, step-siblings and cousins, all of which are constantly plotting against each other for the family fortune. It could have been any of them. My sister and I have been hiding out here in order to stay away from all that..."

"I thought you had two siblings." said Nia.

"Rolo isn't my real sibling. He is, or at least was, an assassin hired by my father that I was at one point brainwashed into think was my brother." Lelouch's eye twitched. "Our relationship is... complicated."

"So why are you telling us this now?" asked Shulk.

"Because it's become clear that this country is no longer safe." Lelouch stared at the city skyline. "I'm going to need protection one way or the other. And I figure the best way to do that is to be as high-profile as possible."

"Well if you just wanted help you should have asked us!" said Simon. "Kidnapping is still a crime, last time I checked. Of course we're going to help! Just give us some warning, next time!"

"Without even asking for anything in return?" Lelouch smirked. "You guys really are heroes."

"You bet we are." Simon looked around. "Say, what happened to Milly?"

"...she took the whole thing pretty hard." said Shulk. "Erm... it's probably the whole lot about people getting killed by Deathstroke and the girl she vouched for turning out to be a murderous psychopath."

"...well, can you let her know I don't blame her for that?" said Simon. "Getting killed in the line of duty is just something that happens. Nobody expected Deathstroke to show up..."

"I can't." Shulk looked uncomfortable. "She's... erm, in the ladies' room."

"Ah, got it. Nia, could you-"

"Sure thing! I'll be back in a sec!" Nia said before walking off.

"Still, I wouldn't worry too much about Milly." said Lelouch. "She can bounce back from anything. My guess is that she's probably just worried about her image."

* * *

Milly stared at her reflection in wide-eyed terror.

On some fundamental level it was... wrong.

Oh it was the right shape, certainly, and it mimicked all her movements, but beyond that it was almost completely alien, with snow-white hair, porcelain-colored skin, long pointed ears, and blank, soulless eyes that lacked pupils.

She looked at her hands... her REAL hands, and found that they, too looked just like the ones in the reflection.

"[Oh god, oh god, oh god...]"she clutched her hands to her head as she moaned. "[Okay, let's think clearly. I haven't touched any magic stuff, it can't be the machine plague since that's not what it does anyway...]"

She looked at her face again, pulling at her skin as if she was trying to remove a mask "[...but LOOK at me! How am I supposed to go out like this? Well, maybe I'd be welcome at a renaissance fair, but-]"

The door to the bathroom creaked open. "...Milly?" a familiar voice said.

"DON'T LOOK AT ME!" Milly leapt back onto the sink as if she were trying to crawl away.

"Milly? It's me, Nia." She opened the door, and stepped into the dimly-lit bathroom. "What's wrong?"

"ISN'T IT OBVIOUS?!" Milly screamed.

"Ah, yes. I guess it is. Sorry." Nia looked at milly with an apologetic face. "...but... Simon says he doesn't blame you."

"DOESN'T BLAME ME?!" Milly fell to her knees, and covered her face. "HOW?! I'M A FREAK!"

"Milly, you made an honest mistake. You cared enough about the team to set up a recruitment drive. Even though you didn't get permission, it was still thoughtful of you." Nia got down on her knees as well, and put her hand on Milly's shoulder. "And nobody could have expected Deathstroke to show up. You mustn't blame yourself for things you can't control."

Milly uncovered her face. Could Nia even see what had happened to her? "Um...Thanks, Nia. That really means alot to me."

"No problem!" Nia replied. "Now let's go. Shirley's going to be back any moment now, and I bet you want to get going."

"Yeah..." Milly glanced back at the mirror. Her reflection was just as freaky as ever. "Nia... do I look strange to you?"

"Not really." said Nia.

"Describe me."

"Well... you're of above-average height, and you've got blond hair, blue eyes, white skin, ..."

"When you say 'white', what do you mean?"

"Well... you know. Caucasian." Nia tilted her head to the side. "Are you... feeling alright?"

Milly put her hand to the side of her head. "Yeah, just dandy... I'm just a bit overtired, is all."

"Well, make sure you get plenty of rest tonight." Nia said. "If you're having trouble sleeping, you could always make an appointment and I could prescribe you some-"

"NO! NO EXAMINATIONS!" Milly blurted. "Uh, that is. I'm afraid of doctors offices, so I don't want to go unless I really have to..."

"Well, to each their own." Nia helped Milly back onto her feet. "Well if you don't want to bother with prescription, you could always pick up some melatonin. I've always found that hel-"

Just then, a crazed-looking girl with orange hair and distinctly-shaped epaulets kicked down the door and pointed a gun at the pair. "A-ha! "Operation Woman In Refrigerator" is off to a smashing success!" But rather than actually making any kind of demands or something, she just continued to talk. "And to think that all I need to do is kidnapp the chairman's girlfriend and stick her in a refrigerator to make the chairman angry enough to go after Lord IlPalazzo and fall into his fiendish trap! It's a good thing that I was able to find a large enough refrigerator or else I'd have to cut her up, and she would die if I did that. And that would be terrible! Much more so than stealing forty cakes, though that's a pretty terrible crime too. Think of all the birthday parties that would be ruined! And I better make sure it's warm in there so she doesn't freeze to death. Actually now that I think about it maybe I'm going about this all wrong; my plan doesn't sound all that tatestful now that I'm describing it. It would be especially disrespectful to that Green Lantern guy. Is he still a Green Lantern? I forget."

"...can we help-" Nia began to say, before the girl started shooting up the floor with her machine gun.

"No talking! "Operation That Almost Certainly Has a Woman in it But May or May not Involve Refrigerators" is a black ops mission and those require stealth! If I hear anyone talking loud enough to give away our position I'll make them do a hundred thousand pushups! And then I'll shoot them! Or maybe I should shoot them and then make them do pushups! But if they're dead I'm probably going to be waiting a long time, and that's no good..."

There was a rustling in the bushes. The crazed girl spun around and said. "Who goes there? Stop or I'll fire! Unless you're an enemy of ACROSS in which case I'll have to fire anyway, so sorry in advance!"

From the bushes, a strange-looking kid kept out, and did an awkward somersault that ended with the girl landing on her back, but quickly scampering back up. Milly instantly recognized her as the drowish-looking kid they were about to interview before Deathstroke showed up. "[Hey you!]" she said, pointing at the crazy girl. ["What do you think you're doing, kidnapping the guys I have an interview with!"] She made a cheesy karate pose, and extended her fingers, the tips of which then transformed into sharp points. "[You'd better give them up right now, else I won't go easy on-]"

Frightened, the orange-haired nut accidently let loose a whole round of machine gun fire in the kid's direction. "Oh no! What have I done!?" dropped to her knees. "I just killed a child! A poor, sweet, innocent child that was threatening to claw my eyes out! Now I'll have to go to jail run by this bible-thumping warden who lets his guards murder the inmates and I'll become his right hand man while simultaneously forming a friendship with this worn out old inmate played by Morgan Freeman-"

Nia smacked the girl over the head with a sap, knocking her out instantly.

"...Um..." Milly began to say.

Nia held up the sap. "Never leave home without one!" she said with a stern face. "Now come on, there's a chance that child might still be alive!"

Exactly one second later, the kid raised her hand. "[I'm okay! I'm okay! I've got healing.]" She sat up. "[I just didn't expect the bullets to hurt so much...]"

Milly looked at the girl for a bit. She looked just like a drow from one of Rivalz's Dungeons and Dragons books. Pointy ears, ebony skin, white hair, purple eyes... yet her clothes were pretty contemporary.

"Where exactly are you from?" Milly asked.

"[Um... I'm from a...]" the kid's eyes darted all over the place. "[...a... tangent dimension! ON MARS!]" she pointed up at the sky. "[No, wait! It's not on Mars, it is Mars! But not our Mars! another Mars that's on a parallel wavelength... thing.]" She then started using her hands like puppets for illustration. "[And, like, there's this dragon! Named Trogdor! And he, like, has no stomach, because whatever he eats gets sent to this universe! And my dad was this knight who fought him, but he was all burninated. And mom was a witch, so she gave me gave me a magic seed that I got superpowers from. But she got burninated too. So I fought the dragon but it ate me. So that's why I'm here!]"

Milly did everything she could not to laugh. That was by far the worst story she had ever been told. It's a wonder who she thought would believe such a rediculous-

"Ooooh! Poor dear!" said Nia, who got down on the grass to give the girl a hug. "[Don't worry, we'll find a way to get you back. Until then, you can stay with us as long as you want...]"

Milly stared at the scene with disbelief. How could anyone be so gullible?

And yet...

Milly noticed that her own features had suddenly taken on a very "elven" appearance. She was willing to bet anything that the sudden arrival of this new girl probably wasn't a coincidence. After all, how many elves wore wear t-shirts and jeans?

No, whatever was going on, this girl was her first hint.

"[So, tell me...]" Milly said. "[What was your name again? I don't think we ever got that.]"

"My name?" the girl looked startled. "[My name is Ho-]" the girl paused, as if her train of thought had suddenly changed direction. "[...oooo-n'kale. Hon'kale. It's, um, an elf word that means 'very lucky'.]"

"I see." Milly smiled. This girl looked like an easy egg to crack. "Well, Hon'kale, how would you like to join the Justice Society?"

* * *

"Well that does it." Merasmus slammed his book shut. "I've run through every test I can imagine, pondered the wisdom of every ancient, scoured every tome of unknowable knowledge that I of." He pointed his index finger at Kallen. "It is because of these very facts, that I have no choice but to conclude that you, Kallen Stadtfeld-"

"Kozuki." said Kallen.

"Kallen Kozuki, are unmistakably, indisputably, and without any doubt whatsoever... A HORRIBLE, flesh-eating ZOMBIE!"

This announcement was made somewhat less impressive by the nearby medic's snoring.

"Dude." Tamaki said. "That was one of the first things you ruled out."

"FOOL!" said Merasmus. "You DARE question a MAGICIAN? I can tell just by LOOKING at her that she is clearly an EMACIATED, ROTTING corpse animated by the FOULEST of oh wait no she doesn't look anything like that does she?" the alleged 'magician' tossed the book over his shoulder, smacking Tamaki in the head. "Well, I'm out of ideas. She's probably just a freak, then." he then turned 180 degrees to face Tamaki. "Now, about my fee..."

"Fee? What fee?" Tamaki sputtered. "You didn't do anything!"

"YOU INSIGNIFICANT MICROBE." Merasmus was suddenly wrapped in a wreath of flames. "You DARE to deny a MAGICIAN his hard-earned PROFITS? For such insolence, I ougt to STRING YOU UP in the deepest, darkest part of THE NETHERREALM, where your body will turn itself INSIDE-OUT in UTTER TERROR, but you'll still be ALIVE to hear the haunting music of THE DEVIL'S ORCHESTRA OF THE DAMNED! And you know the thing about the damned? They only know one song, AND THEY'RE REALLY BAD AT IT!"

"OKAY I'M SORRY I WON'T DO THAT AGAIN." Tamaki curled up into a fetal position on his seat.

"...need a... dispenser over here..." the medic snored.

"That's better." Merasmus returned to his normal, less on-fire self. "Now, since you clearly don't have the authority to make such a transaction, I shall await the return of your master. Toodles." And then he walked out of the room.

"…I'd better get going, too." muttered Kallen as she got out of her bed.

"Woah, hey! You can't just do that!" Tamaki got up from his own seat. "Zero's gonna throw a fit if he finds out you left before-"

"...what do you think he's going to do, fire me?" Kallen gave Tamaki an annoyed stare. "Look, I still don't know what's going on but I feel fine. Okay?"

Tamaki iched the back of his neck as he looked up at the ceiling with a mild grimace. "Allright, suit yourself. But if anyone asks, I was never here."

Kallen lurched out of the room, her joints still stiff from all the bed-rest.

"Okay. I've got annoying superpowers and an easily avoidable weakness:" she thought."I'll be fine if I just stay out of jewelry stores and churches."

The door-handle snapped off as Kallen tried to leave the medical wing. She glared at the broken handle as she continued to ponder her situation. "Either whatever happened to me isn't supposed to be a curse, or the bad stuff hasn't quite kicked in yet."

She looked at her watch. If she left now, Kallen could probably make it back to the academy in time for lunch. Not that it was an option at this point, seeing how she still couldn't walk through a door without tearing it off its hinges.

"Best thing to do at this point is go home, see if Dad's old library has anything on this, and then get help from an actualwizard." For probably the first time in her life, Kallen was grateful that her father had an unhealthy obsession with the occult. Unless it turned out that these powers were his fault in the first place. Though it's not like her opinion of him could really be any lower at this point.

Now out of the medical bay, Kallen tried to fetch a 10-yen piece out of her pocket to buy a soda from a vending machine, only to accidentally bend it into kind of a taco shape. "Of course that's assuming I don't get arrested for destroying something by accident."

"Well whatever's going on here, I'm not going to get anything done just by sitting around." she mused. She looked up into the cloudless afternoon sky, and watched as an albatross passed overhead.

"I wonder..." Kallen looked around to see if anyone was watching her.

The coast clear, Kallen broke into a brisk run. She accelerated faster and faster as her feet hit the ground with superhuman force. Kallen quickly realized that she had to be careful if she wanted to avoid hurting anyone, so she stuck to the road when she could, steered clear of the island's more crowded areas, and tried to avoid uneven terrain.

But most importantly of all, Kallen did not stick her arms out in front and pretend to be Superman. Because of course that was the sort of thing that little children wearing bathtowels around their necks, not teenagers who moonlighted as hardened mercenaries. "I mean what am I, nine?"she thought.

She then came across a very long stretch of road with nothing of note ahead except for a T-shaped intersection overlooking a long, rocky slope that fed into the ocean.

"...well, might as well give it a shot."

From her jog, Kallen made a mighty leap. She soared, up over the roadway, up over the intersection, up over the-

And then Kallen began to fall as discovered that flight was not, in fact, one of her powers.

As he tumbled down the rocky slope and into the water, Kallen made another discovery: While her body was still invincible, her clothes were not. Nor were they waterproof. She considered herself lucky just to get away with some scuffed shoes and a few tears in her jeans.

"Well, there goes another nostalgic childhood fantasy."Kallen thought as she climbed out of the ocean and onto the rocky beach. "I wonder how much a pair of lead weights cost these days..."

* * *

BETHANY SNOW: Good evening folks. And welcome back to Channel 52. It is a very solemn night at the station, as we mourn the passing of Earth's greatest protector.

AMBUSH BUG: It is with a heavy heart that I announce the death of one and only Superman. We will never forget his noble sacrifice, as he was horribly murdered fighting a kryptonite elemental created by- hold it, I'm getting an update... this just in! He's already back! False alarm, everyone!

CALENDER MAN: In other news, the Green Lantern Corps. have reported that the notorious space pirate known as "Captain Harlock" has been spotted in the vicinity of our solar system. His current bounty is at seven hundred and seventy seven billion space dollars, and is likely to rise in the coming weeks. Harlock is the third such notorious, intergalactic criminal to be spotted in the past week, after the mysterious "Mister" and the even more enigmatic "Monkey D. Luffy", who is so mysterious that we don't even have a photograph of him. He must really be that scary. And now here's our foreign correspondent, Dr. W, with an update on the new Justice Society.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Thank you, Calendar Man. I'm here at the Hamarikyu Gardens in Tokyo, following up on your report of the new superteam known as "The Justice Society of Japan". Just one day since the roster was announced, and already the team's recruitment drive is off to a smashing success. I mean just LOOK at all those brave young men, women, genderless aliens, cyborgs, and combinations of the above. I don't think I've seen this many crime-fighters in one place since Super Young Team's own recruitment drive. Anyway, today I'm speaking with the group's publicist, who despite not being a crime-fighter herself has nevertheless decided to hide her true identity for safety reasons. Now tell me, how many new members are you recruiting?

TOTALLY NOT MILLY ASHFORD: It's hard to say, really. But we're estimating somewhere around two, maybe three.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: So you're saying most of these folks will be going home disappointed?

TOTALLY NOT MILLY ASHFORD: Sadly. But it's not often that the Japanese hero community gets together like this, so I'd like to feel like they'll be going home with something, at least.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Well then, would you like to share with the audience what you expect out of a new recruit?

TOTALLY NOT MILLY ASHFORD: By all means! We're looking for someone driven. Someone anxious to go out and save the day each morning. Someone enthusiastic, animated, a real force of personality. And of course, bringing something new to the table wouldn't hurt.

THE 11TH DOCTOR: Well that's about all the time we have, miss! Back to you, Snow.

BETHANY SNOW: Thank you, Doctor. Coming up, the world's leading Paleontologists discuss the so-called "Hollow Earth" theory. But first, here's Joseph Coyne with the latest on Wall Street...

* * *

**Omake #1: Wherein I Attempt to Write a Humorously Over The Top Drizzt Do'Urden Parody Without Actually Having Read Any Books About Him**

Deathstroke was about to pull the trigger, when suddenly an AWESOME drow ranger just came right the fuck out of nowhere and defeated Deathstroke with a single flying karate kick to the face.

"Drizzt Do'Urden?!" Simon exclaimed, "Whaaaaaat are you doing here?!"

"Well, I was just on my way back from fighting Lobo, Larfleeze, Sephiroth, Bizzaro, Solomon Grundy, Gorilla Grodd, Darkseid, Lord English, the Anti-Monitor, the Anti-Sun, the Anti-Christ, the Anti-God, the Anti-Anti Devil, the regular Devil, Vandal Savage, Lolth, Sauron, Morgoth, and my evil twin from the antimatter universe all at the same time (I won of course) when I decided to drop by to see how my daughter was doing!"

"Yay, daddy!" said Hope.

"Hey there, champ!" Drizzt said. He then looked at his watch, which was beeping rapidly. "Uh oh, looks like Mandrakk is trying to eat the multiverse. Again." He winked and gave everyone the thumbs up. "Don't worry. This will only take a minute."

He then got on his Mobius Cycle (which used to be Metron's Mobius Chair before he lost it in a card game because DRIZZT WAS THAT AWESOME) and then zoomed away in a flash of non-euclidian light.

And then everyone swooned and said "He's so dreamy!".

Yes including Deathstroke.

Author's Notes

My god, this chapter turned violent in a hurry. o_0

But that's what you get when you add Deathstroke!

One of the goals for this story was to take fanfiction cliches and kind of reconstruct them. If you've read Hope's entry in the character guide, you know what I'm doing with her, and her behavior in coming up with her own "OC" just reinforces this. Those familiar with my MST series are already familiar with Electra's brand of "KID FROM THE FUTURE WHO MUST SAVE TEH WORLD"ness, with the added problem that she's pretty much the opposite of a hero.

But Ino is a combination of three well-worn cliches; two of which are kind of general, and the other is fandom-specific.

First of all, she's amnesiac. That should already be sending out some "alarm bells" for those well versed in fanfiction cliches. But unlike most examples of laser-guided amnesia, she's clearly forgotten more than the name of her childhood friend who killed her parents and then raped her or whatever. In reality, she probably wouldn't be able to function without constant coaching and supervision.

As for the 'mysterious power', I'd say I'm ahead of most because the power is well-defined, limited in use, and even somewhat inconvenient. You'll see what I mean in later chapters.

Finally, she's an OC Keybearer. The Kingdom Hearts fandom is plagued with the damn things, and the revelation that there used to be a fuckton of Keyblades lying around certainly hasn't helped matters. In fact there was even a game that deconstructed this by having a 14th member of Organization XIII appear who had a Keyblade, but she turned out to be a replica of Sora's memories or something.

But I think the thing that saves these characters from being Mary Sues is that they're part of an ensemble cast. You see, it's my personal belief that a true "Mary Sue" is a character that the world revolves around for no clear reason. These OCs are important, to be sure, but so is everyone else in the cast. At least I hope so.

Also:

I've decided that while Batman is probably Lelouch's favorite superhero, he likes Alan Scott's/Golden Age Green Lantern's/Sentinel's costume better since he digs the opera cape. As Linkara puts it, it's a costume that really shouldn't work and ought to look really silly on an old guy, but somehow looks awesome instead.

And in case anyone asks, I don't mind the fact that Alan Scott of Earth-2 is now gay. What I do mind is that the Allan Scott of Earth-1 no longer exists, at least in canon. *sigh*

For geography nuts, there actually is a tennis court near the Tokyo Tower. I think it belongs to a school or something.

Canonically, Sayaka's magic can only heal herself, buuuuut given the nature of her wish I'm going to say that she can heal others as well. ;)

Excel is still the most fun character to write.

Fun fact: I had a cape when I was a kid, but I didn't pretend to be Superman; I pretended to be Mario.

HAIL ILPALAZZO!


	5. Chapter 5

[Cover: A scene of Sayaka charging at Madoka with her sword drawn, while Madoka (dressed in her magical girl costume) prepares to fire an arrow in retaliation. A caption reads "NOT A DREAM! NOT AN IMAGINARY STORY!" Below that, another caption reads: "You asked for it, we're giving it to you! For the first time in history, Madoka Kamine and Sayaka Miki will FIGHT*!" The asterisk leads to a message that says in small text "*Actually this is a complete lie. The pictured scene does not happen."]

* * *

"Doctor? What are you doing up there?"

From his vantage point on a thick tree branch, Dr. Summers took a peek at the ground below. There, he saw Shinji looking back up at him with a puzzled look on his face.

"That is an... excellent question." Dr. Summers responded. He began to inch down at a methodical pace. "Erm, sorry. It was the supervillain attack. I'm powerless and slightly out of shape; not the kind of person built for spontaneous heroics."

Shinji nodded silently.

"Now then..." the doctor brushed brushed his hands against his shirt. "How was your patrol?"

"Well... one of the new girls went crazy and tried to kill someone, but I didn't really make it over in time to do anything." Shinji eyes drooped, likely in anticipation of the speech he was sure to get.

"Ah." Dr. Summers tried to come up with something comforting to say. "...That's okay; it's probably best if you just watch for now." He coughed. "Did you... erm, make any friends?"

Shinji thought back to that afternoon, back to the blue and pink-haired girls he had spent most of the day with. "...maybe?"

"Ah, thats good!" said the doctor. "Tell me about them."

Shinji scratched the back of his neck. "Well, Madoka is nice, and Sayaka is kinda nice too..." Just then, he remembered why he had sought out Dr. Summers in the first place. "...oh! That reminds me! That girl Electra tried to kill is kind of... off."

"Off? What do you mean?"

"It's kind of hard to explain. Here, I'll show you..."

* * *

"So, Ino. What can you remember?"

The raven-haired girl looked behind her back. "Who's Ino?" she asked.

"...Isn't that your name?"

"Oh! I guess it is." Ino blushed. "Sorry, almost forgot."

"Uh-huh..." Lightning remained unamused. "Tell me, what do you know about Electra?"

"Who?"

"The girl who attacked you."

"I was attacked?"

"...yes. We spent the better part of the afternoon trying to rescue you."

"From what?"

"From Electra. Remember? The girl who tried to kill you?"

"Someone tried to kill me?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I don't know, that's what we're trying to figure out."

"Why?"

"Because after all the trouble we went through, I think it's only fair that we learn why."

"Why what?"

"Why we had to rescue you."

"...I had to be rescued?"

"Thank you, Farron, that will be enough." Dr. Summer adjusted his spectacles, and turned to the assembled heroes. "At this point it's clear that Ino suffers from something that we like to call 'Anterograde Amnesia'. And before you ask, it's when the mind has trouble forming new memories, leading to poor short-term memory."

"Well even I knew that..." Simon lied.

Nia spoke up. "And there's no sign of head trauma, nor are there any signs of unusual toxins in her bloodstream. So whatever it is it's probably not recent. "

"And it's not being caused by nanomachines or a mind probe or whatever." said Shirley. "...I checked."

"And I can't get a good scan in with the Monado, so it might be magical in nature." said Shulk. "Problem is, from everything else I've seen this girl is downright anathema to magic; one touch was able to drain most of the mana from Lightning's system. I shudder to imagine what prolonged contact would do..."

Milly took a nervous step back.

"I'll just get a pair of gloves." said Lightning. "Sayaka carried the kid around everywhere, and she was just fine. Skin contact has to be the vector."

"Still, be careful in the future." said Shulk. "Your body needs every drop just to stay alive, and now that we know how badly you react to anti-magic-"

"[Hey mom, this is boring. Can we go now?]"

Everyone looked at the little drow girl tugging on Nia's dress.

"Um... Nia?" said Simon. "Who is that?"

"Oh, this is Hon'kale!" said Nia, her face flustered with embarrassment. "She's a... what do you call it? An 'Orphan', I think?" She bent down and put her hand on the girl's shoulder before launching into a hastily constructed pitch. "She's from a tangent dimension where her parents were killed by a dragon isn't that sad? And you know we don't even know yet if our biologies are remotely compatible, and you know she's rather taken with me so maybe I was kind of hoping that maybe we could possibly adopt her? Please?"

"[Pweeeeeeeeze?]" said Hon'kale, her eyes tearing up in the most saccharine way she could manage.

"Eh-heh..." Simon's face froze. He felt everyone's stares peircing him like so many red-hot knives. "If I say no, she'll be devastated. If I say yes, we might regret it later. So the only solution is to say... 'maybe'?"

"Um... well... I'm not sure a kid is in the cards right now..."

"But Si-mon..." Nia's lower lip quivered as she gave Simon her own puppy-dog eyed expression.

It was a face that Simon found impossible to say no to. It reminded him of the day they first met, when he found a young, vulnerable girl locked up in a big metal crate, jettisoned by one of the Spiral Kingdom's cargo freights like she was common trash, abandoned by the father she once worshiped...

"...buuuuuut I guess she could stay for a little while..." Simon conceded.

"[YAAAAAAAY!]" Hon'kale bounced up and down, ecstatic to hear the news. "[He did say 'yes', right mom?]"

"[He's giving us a... I think it's called a 'trial run'.]" said Nia. "[And I'm not quite your mother just yet...]"

["Awwwwwww..."] Hon'kale pouted.

"Now hold on just a second." said Lightning. "First of all, I've never heard of any such thing as a 'Tangent Dimension'. Second, how do we know she's telling the truth, and not just some kind of runaway?"

"Well first, you've never heard of Hypertime either and I can tell you first hand that it exsits." Simon replied. "So maybe there's tangent dimensions, too."

Lightning looked unconvinced. "...'Hypertime'?"

"It's a bit of a complicated subject…" Shulk explained. "Some of the higher-ups don't like talking about it, but I can assure you that 'Hypertime' isn't just something Simon made up. Nor is it something he saw in an old B-movie."

Lightning shook her head.

"As for your second point…" Nia cupped her hands togeather. "If Hon'kale's parents are alive and it's easy to go between here and whenever her home is, then they'll probably come looking for her very soon. If getting here is hard, then she needs a caretaker until they come to pick her up, assuming they ever do..."

Just then, Ino decided to speak up. "Um..." she began, "...I don't really have a place either. Do you think you could... I dunno... maybe let me stay, too?"

"Sure, why not?" said Simon. "[The more the merrier] I think the saying goes...?"

"[Awesome! That means we're going to be sisters!]" Hon'Kale wrapped her arms tight around Ino, and squeezed her tight. "[You can understand what I say, right?]"

"[Mostly.]" Ino replied.

"[THAT'S EVEN MORE AWESOME! We're gonna play video games, and eat sugary cereal until we explode, and watch youtube videos, and have pillow fights, and...]"

As hope continued down the list of things she and her new "sister" would do together. Simon began to wonder where they put the spare futon. This was going to be a long night.

* * *

"We'll take it from here, thanks."

Shirou backed away as the paramedics lifted the guy in the viking helmet onto the stretcher, and slowly raised it into the ambulance. Immediately, the high-tech autosurgeons inside the ambulance got to work sewing up the wounds Shirou had previously bandaged. Of course the autosurgeons couldn't do everything, but a few days bedrest and Super Cosmic Viking Man would be back to his old self.

Shirou reflected on how hard it was for a relatively ordinary guy to help out in a situation like this. He had magic, true, but nothing that had any obvious application when it came to saving lives. Projection magic only goes so far when all you have is a high-school education. He couldn't even begin to describe how an autosurgeon worked, or what kind of chemical compounds made up an anesthetic. But a bandage? That was easy. Even a defibrillator wasn't all that complicated when you came down to it; it was just a battery controlled by a simple circuit board. And a bit of first aid training always came in handy, especially when the most the Ashford students knew was what they saw on TV. Rivalz in particular had a rather skewed view of how CPR worked.

Just then, as the ambulance was speeding off into the distance, Shirou felt a faint buzzing in his pocket. It was Ms. Fujimura, his stepmom, likely calling to see how he was doing.

"Heeey, Shirou." slurred the voice on the other end of the line. "Howzit goin' over there in Tokyo 'n stuff?"

"Um... Taiga? Are you drunk again?"

"Waa? Me? Naaaaawwwww... you know me, I js' had a little drink 'isall." Shirou felt as if he could smell the sake on Taiga's breath."So whenya comin' back anyway? You've been missin' school ya know. Are ya still in the hospital? I always thought you healed faster than that..."

"Aha, well... It's just that I got a job with the new Justice Society." it was a half-lie, to be sure. Shirou had only been volunteering up until now, but he figured he could probably get a full-time job if he asked Simon politely. Simon seemed cool that way.

Taiga laughed "Always figured you'd end up in tights one day! So what are ya? Kendo-Boy?

'Wrench-Lad'? Hope the costume doesn't suck..."

"...actually I'm not a costumed hero, I'm just part of the support team."

"Oh." Taiga sounded slightly disappointed. "Well that's still cool; you still get to save lives n' stuff. Bet 'yer dad would be proud."she hiccuped. "So, you quittn' school or do you want me to keep sending your homework?"

"Erm... I'm not sure really. Call me in a few days and we'll see."

"Okay great. G'night Shirou!" he was about to hang up when Taiga blurted out one more sentence. "Oh, and if you ever meet Booster Gold, get me his autograph!"

"...who's Booster Gold?"

"Oh, you know. The green guy, with the ring. 'In brightest day, in blackest night', that sorta thing."

"...you mean Green Lantern."

"Yeah, thats the one!" Taiga hiccuped again. "Okay, I need beauty sleep. Buh-bye!"

There was then a clattering noise in Shirou's, most likely the sound of Taiga failing to hang up the phone properly. Shirou saved Taiga the trouble by hanging up on his end, and pocketing the phone. He then looked at his watch.

"10:30" he thought. "Not much more I can do here. Better get some rest myself. Then I can worry about long-term employment..."

* * *

Kallen struggled to keep her eyes open as she stared at the pile of dusty tomes before her. To the left were the books she had already looked through that she found to be unreadable, useless, or both. Like much of the idle rich, Gregor Stadtfeld had his hobbies that he obsessed over but lacked the conviction to focus on any of them long enough to actually accomplish much of anything.

Kallen's childhood memories of her father followed a familiar pattern: first Gregor would disappear to search for a lost city or some ancient artifact. A month later, he would arrive back home without finding the object of his quest, but nevertheless brought with him with a pile of new books. Then he'd lock himself in his study for weeks at a time, only pausing to brag about his findings at the dinner table (which is why Kallen's stepmom made it a point not to invite company while Gregor was around). Eventually Gregor would announce his intentions to set off in search of whatever his latest obsession was, and would then spend the next couple days making travel arrangements before finally departing.

And then one day, on Kallen's tenth birthday, Gregor left to find Shangri-la and never came back.

Kallen didn't know what to think at the time. Gregor wasn't a particularly caring father, but unlike Kallen's stepmom he wasn't particularly spiteful, either. He was fairly nice to his servants all things considered; he thanked them for the work they did and only rarely got them involved in his obsessions. The only reason that he had the affair that Kallen was born from was that his wife was sterile, yet insisted that he produce an heir.

But as Kallen looked back on things, she realized that there was no love between them. At best, Gregor regarded Kallen as a conversation partner. At worst, she was a captive audience for his lectures. And they weren't even very good lectures; Gregor had this rambling way of speech that seemed to jump between topics with very little warning. He spoke like a man who was certain about everything up until he was inevitably proven wrong.

Though looking at the books that filled his personal library, it wasn't hard to see where he got the habit from. Rather than the fonts of forbidden knowledge that Kallen expected, she found herself swimming through volumes of lore that was apocryphal, if not downright contradictory. At one point she even read that Atlantis was on the Moon, under Japan, and on Ireland all in the same sentence.

The only reason she pressed onward was that for every few dozen books purporting that aliens invented the printing press, she came across something that seemed more plausible (at least as far as weird magic stuff was concerned). An Encyclopediae of The Faerie, for instance, was a highly-detailed hand-written notebook that meticulously chronicled dozens of bizarre creatures, and contained detailed instructions for everything from taming a Kelpie to rooting out a Fetch.

Sadly, nothing in the book even remotely described anything Kallen was experiencing. So she moved onto one of the more promising tomes; Daemonology: The Current Studey and Classification of The Moderne Daemon, Year of Our Lord 1679. She turned to the book's preface, and began to read:

"[The Daemon is the most wicked and deceitful of creatures. They are innumerable in forme, and unparalleled in craftiness; only by the grace of God Almighty are we not over-run by their endless numbers. But 'tis foolishness to think that faith alone will protect thee. While steadfast adherence to dogma is enough to thwart Neron, Shabranigdo, or even Lucifer himself, the 'Moderne Daemon' has little respect for the ways of olde. Scratch, Femto, Mundis; these are the names that you must commit to memorie, as their ways are more subtle than their kin. While their disciples are few in number, they remain yet hidden, working in the shadows to slowly corrupt our world in hopes of creating an infernal paradise on Earth.]"

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"Come in." Kallen said, not wanting to risk anything given how much trouble she was having with doorknobs.

Shortly afterwards, the doorknob turned, and Miyu Kozuki stepped into the room. She was a demure Japanese woman with light brown hair that was tied into a short ponytail, and wearing a nightgown in lieu of the french maid outfit she usually wore. She walked into the darkened room carrying a plate of milk and cookies in one hand, and a flashlight in the other.

"Kallen?" she said. "What are you doing up so late?"

Kallen's family life was complicated, to say the least. One of the few stipulations that Mrs. Kozuki had when she let Kallen be adopted by the Stadtfelds was that Miyu would be employed as a maid so she could watch her daughter grow up. In fact, late-night was probably the only time Kallen felt safe to even acknowledge her birth-mother let alone speak freely. Kallen figured she had a right to know that everything was going okay even though it wasn't.

"Oh, hey mom." Kallen put on a 'sullen teenage look' to try and scare her off. "Big paper due tomorrow. Can't talk. You know how it is."

"I see..." Ms. Kozuki continued to approach, only to stop a few feet away. "Are you... wearing colored contacts?"

"Frig, forgot about the eyes..." Kallen thought to herself. "...yeah. It's this new style Milly wanted me to try. She says they go well with my hair." she pointed at her left eyeball. "Just be glad I didn't take her first suggestion; she wanted this one to be green..."

Kallen's mom nodded. "She is a very strange girl, isn't she?" she then put the tray down next to Kallen. "Well, I'm sure whatever you come up with will be just fine." She gave Kallen a quick peck on the cheek. "Just try not to get any crumbs on your father's old books."

"Yeah..." Kallen felt her skin crawl whenever she heard mom refer to Gregor as 'your father'. "Goodnight, Mom."

"Goodnight, Kallen." And then Ms. Kozuki left the room.

Kallen looked at the tray of cookies her mom left behind. "Hm... chocolate chip." She imagined how the freshly-baked confections would taste in her mouth, especially when rounded off with a nice, tall glass of milk. "Well I am getting hungry..."

Very carefully, Kallen reached out to grab one of the cookies on the tray. She gripped the edge of the cookie by her forefingers, taking great care not to crush it with her newly-enhanced strength.

She was somewhat less successful with the milk: the moment she wrapped her hands around the glass, it exploded in a shower of pointy shards. The milk got everywhere, but the demonology book seemed to get the worst of it. The milk soaked straight through the center of the worn pages, leaving only a pulpy blob of ink and parchment in its stead.

"Great..." Kallen looked over the mess. She figured she could get things cleaned up in about thirty minutes, fifteen if she was lucky. But despite the numerous tomes she had yet to sort through, the incident discouraged her to much to try anything else.

"Ugh, I'm overthinking this." she thought. "At this point, the best thing to do is go to school, let the rest of the council know what happened, and then get Nina to build me some kind of... I dunno, a strength-dampening exoskeleton or something." She then left for the kitchen to grab some paper towels. "Hell, they've probably been sitting around twiddling their thumbs while I was gone. At least now they'll have something to talk about..."

* * *

Madoka and Sayaka were lucky to catch the last train out of Tokyo. Even with Kyubey's warning, they really had to hoof it in order to make it to the station on time. It was only once they were on the train that they began to relax. They handed their tickets to the teller, and made themselves comfortable on their cushioned, metal seats.

Madoka looked up at the sky. Even as the countryside sped past them at frightening speed, it was comforting, to see the stars hanging in place. Today was an interesting day, but it was also very stressful; it was hard to see her friend go off to fight when Madoka herself was helpless to change anything.

Unlike Shinji. Thinking back, Madoka figured he might have stopped all of this before it started, but he just wasn't fast enough. The poor kid probably beat himself up about that all the way back to the park. The most Madoka could do was be strong, like Sayaka.

Speaking of Sayaka, Madoka had worried how they were going to explain how they were so late coming back home. Kyubey tried to ease her fears by explaining that he was sending psychic signals into their minds keeping them from worrying about the girls' absence, but now Madoka was worrying about exactly how much power Kyubey actually had. After all, he could grant wishes and give people superpowers, why he doesn't just go out and hunt witches himself?

This train of thought was interrupted by a loud yawn coming from Sayaka's direction. "Aw man, I'm beat..." she said. "If I wasn't scurrying around like a frightened insect, I was healing every Tom, Dick and Harry that scraped his knee fighting Deathstroke." She stared at the inky presence swirling around her Soul Gem. "...and I'm down to my last Grief Seed, too." She reached into her backpack, and pulled out what looked an onyx gem trapped in a metal cage, with a pointed spire running straight through. Impossibly, the gem stood on it's tip as Sayaka held it out in her palm. "Looks like I'm gonna need to borrow from Mami again..."

Madoka looked thoughtfully at her friend. Kyubey did say it was rare for Puella Magi to use their powers to fight ordinary crime. Perhaps the lack of Grief Seeds was the problem? "How many do you owe her, anyway?" she asked.

"Well, there's the one she gave me right off the bat to show how they worked, the one from the time I wore myself out searching all those abandoned labyrinths..." Sayaka held up her Soul Gem to the Grief Seed, drawing the darkness in her gem into the seed like a magnet. "Plus there's the one I'm gonna owe her friend for taking care of that blonde weirdo..."

"What did you say her name was, again?"

"I dunno, Kyoko... something. She's part of a death cult or whatever, I wasn't paying attention."

An image flashed through Madoka's head of a dominatrix-themed magical girl tying Electra to an inverted cross surrounded by a pentagram, with a bloody pendulum suspended overhead. "Um, when you say 'take care of her'..."

"Don't worry, she's just going to bring Electra to the police. Mami says she's long since gotten over that cult stuff. She'll probably rough her up a bit, but probably nothing too serious."

Now Madoka was picturing the slightly-less frightening scenario of the dominatrix girl strangling Electra while she was bound and gagged.

"Hey, don't worry. Mami says the girl is trustworthy as long as we actually pay her."

"Well... if that's the case... I guess that'll be fine." Madoka tried to change the subject. "So, did you get the concert tickets for tomorrow?"

"Yep! Three front-row seats to see Hatsune Miku, live on stage!" Sayaka grinned as she held out a trio of aqua-blue tickets. "You have NO idea what kind of hell I had to go through to get these. Fighting Witches has nothing on Ticketmonster." She put the tickets back in the bag. "With any luck, Kyousuke will give me his first kiss, and you'll be there to record it!"

Madoka raised her finger in nervous objection. "Are you sure that's such a good idea? Don't you think he'd rather prefer privacy?"

"Oh he's not gonna notice; He's gonna have his eyes closed all romantic-like." she snapped her fingers. "Be-sides; worst case scenario Kyubey can just make him forget all about seeing the camera. Right, Kyubey?"

"Of course!" said Kyubey. "After all, it is a fairly minor thing to do, and it is a continuation of the spirit of your wish..."

"Well... I guess if nobody knows about it I guess that's fine." Madoka tried to ignore the sinking feeling in her gut for the sake of her friend. "And I guess if it gets out I could just say it was an innocent mistake..."

"There ya go! Problem solved!" Sayaka snapped her fingers. "Man, you guys are great. This really means a lot to me, you know..."

Madoka nodded. She still didn't quite understand why Sayaka would spend her wish to heal the arm of Kyousuke Kamijou, the world-famous violin prodigy, but then again Madoka had never fallen in love before. Presumably she would understand when she got older.

Her thoughts flashed back to Shinji, and how lonely he seemed to be. "Think you could get another ticket?" Madoka asked.

"This close to the concert? I doubt it…" Sayaka closed her eyes and rubbed her chin, as if she was thinking hard about something. "Unless Kyubey has something up his sleeves."

Kyubey shook his head. "Sorry, I just checked the listings. At this point it would take a miracle to get another seat, let alone one in the front row. And I don't think something as temporary as concert tickets are worth spending your wish on..."

"I was afraid you'd say that…" Madoka sighed.

* * *

Electra Pendragon was not having a good day.

Her first problem was the approaching end of the world. That was still a thing, at least according to the Apoco-scope, and despite her best efforts Electra had made virtually no progress in the matter. Her second problem was that was still stuck in… well, whatever this weird baseball dimension was called.

It's not as if she hadn't tried to escape. But one could only whack an invincible portal with a magical baseball bat for so many hours before descending into a fit blubbering hysteria. And as it turned out, blubbering hysteria wasn't very productive either.

But after hours of trying to bribe, threaten, seduce, sweet-talk, strangle, humiliate, and blackmail the portal, Electra found herself in a more lucid state on the other side of madness. A state that most of us would call "boredom".

Electra leaned back in the L-shaped lump of metal. It had been straight once, but a few hours of whacking it with a club had fixed that. She stared into the void above, and began to daydream about what she would do when she escaped.

She wouldn't quit; that was for sure. Considering the lengths she went to in order to go back in time in the first place, Electra would be a laughing stock if she returned without accomplishing anything.

Instead, she thought about starting over, finding a new group of heroes she could manipulate into helping her. Ones that would show her more respect.

Perhaps Super Young Team? They were gullible enough, but Electra wouldn't trust those idiots to polish her armor, let alone attempt any kind of multifaceted plan. Big Science Action? Traditionalist simpletons stuck in their ways; trying to convince them of anything would be like talking to a boulder. The Justice Leagues? Well, she had nothing but contempt for the main league and the JLA, and based on what she heard about the so-called "Justice League Dark" she'd, probably get roped into to helping John Constantine exorcise a piss demon from Green Lantern before she got anywhere close to earning their trust. Not to mention the fact that all three of them would probably mistake Electra's father as a common villain, despite his most noble of intentions...

And then a thought struck Electra. Perhaps she was going about this all wrong? What if instead of looking for "heroes" (and Electra used that term loosely) she sought the aid of villains instead? Normally Electra would never associate with such vagabonds and thieves, Electra's father had done just that in times past.

Electra rattled down the list of directionless fools she could easily draft into her "Injustice Society", before settling on an imaginary team consisting of Felix Faust, Vash the Stampede, Bolphunga the Unrelenting, Albert Wesker, and a Doomsday clone (she figured that Lex Luthor had one lying around somewhere). True, they'd probably betray each other once the job was done, but It was only a means to an end. If they weren't done killing each other by the end of things, electra and her father would simply dispose of them personally. It was a foolproof plan, if she did say so herself.

Of course, this all led back into her main problem; Electra still had no idea how to escape.

She got up and walked over to the edge of one of the pathways and stared at the void below. For a second, she wondered what would happen if she jumped. She ran through the possibilities: She could, for instance, fall forever through an endless void untill she starved to death. Or perhaps the world looped in on itself like in a video game and she would just end back started, albeit at terminal velocity. Or maybe there was something down there she couldn't see. But whatever would happen, Electra concluded it wouldn't be pleasant, so she pushed the thought out of her mind.

Just then, the incessant droning of the crowd was broken by what sounded like a pair of sharp scissors tearing through paper. She turned her head towards the source of the noise and found that a second, irregularly-shaped portal had appeared. It was very much unlike the ones she was familiar with; it appeared to be a glistening pool of molten silver suspended in mid-air.

Electra walked up to the portal, and prodded it experimentally. A wave of cascading ripples emanated from the point of contact. She felt a chill sweep through her spine. It felt… wrong, somehow. Though she couldn't quite put her finger on why…

...and it was then Electra began aware of a slight prickling sensation on the back of her neck, one of the few places on her body that wasn't armored in some way.

"Don't turn around." said a voice behind her. It was unmistakably a child's voice, but her tone had an unmistakable hardness to it. "You're Electra, right?"

Electra laughed. Obviously this commoner thought she could be captured like a mere nobleman. Best to lead the girl on a bit, see what she knows. "I see my reputation precedes me," she said. "And what are you called, pray tell?"

"None of your beeswax," said the assailant. "I ask the questions here."

"That you do." Electra began to turn her neck, but the spear began to press deeper into her flesh. It was… more painful than she anticipated, as the thought had never occurred to her that a mere mortal would be capable of to hurting her, if ever so slightly. "A-ask way then!" Electra stammered as she tried to maintain her composure.

"Okay then. First off, what the hell is that?" A childlike arm stretched past Electra's face, and pointed at the portal in front of her.

Seizing the opportunity Electra grabbed the arm, intending to turn the tables on her captor. But instead the opposite happened; she underestimated the girl's strength and dexterity, and with a deafening "clang" Electra was tossed to the floor like a tangled-up marionette.

As much as she mentally insisted that this was all part of the plan, the only thing she thing Electra could really call a "success" was that she now had a good look at the girl that was currently standing on her stomach with a spear pointed directly at Electra's throat. Just as she suspected, it was another child; a magical girl around the same age as the blue-haired tramp that outmaneuvered Electra earlier that day. She was wearing white sleeves with black wristguards, a red, sleeveless vest that extended into a frilly skirt, and red boots with black stockings. Her hair was an untamed mess of crimson locks, tied up into a flame-like ponytail with a black bow. Below the neck the was a piece cut out of the vest that vaguely looked like an eye, complete with a large, red gem in the place where the pupil should be.

But to Electra, the most readily apparent aspect of the red-haired girl was that she was giving her an intense glare.

"Now let's try this again." Keeping one hand on her spear, the girl pointed at the silver pool. "What. Is. That."

"Why... it's a portal to the Infinite Plane of Candy, of course." said Electra, a bead of sweat descending from her brow. "Just stick your head in, and a trio of singing leprechauns will feed you the most delectable jellybeans in all the land."

"Okay." The girl demonstrated a surprising amount of strength for her diminutive frame as she grabbed Electra by the neck, and shoved right in front of the portal. "You first."

"Ah… that was just a mere joke, child!" Electra leaned back and gazed at the distorted reflection of her own face. "No, no, in reality I have no idea what that thing is but I'm sure it's of no concern to us now if you please just give me a chance to explain myself-"

A Large, metal hand emerged from the portal. Electra screamed as Kyoko pulled her away, leaving the hand to swipe at empty air.

"Fucking idiot." a nasally voice echoed from the pool. "You missed by a fucking mile. You need glasses or something? Let me show you how it's done… **Avada Kedavra!**"

Seconds later the green bolt shot out of the pool, heading straight for Electra and her captor. The redhead pushed Electra aside in order to gain enough leverage to dodge the blast herself.

"...I don't get it." said another voice, this one deep and gravelly.

"Shaddup, Blade!" said the first voice.

"I told you, my name's Vash…"

"And I keep telling you that name's fucking retarded! It's 'Blade' now, you understand?"

"But-"

"Which one of us in charge here?"

"...you are, boss."

"EX-actly. Now pipe down and let me do the talking."

The portal rumbled for a few seconds more, and with a faint "plorp", a pair of figures emerged. One was a broad-shouldered, heavyset man with red eyes and silver hair, wearing a plain red jacket. The other, a pale-skinned teenager with long, ebony-black hair with purple streaks and red tips that reached down to her mid-back. She was wearing a bizarre outfit that consisted of a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. For a moment, Electra forgot about her standards and snickered.

The redhead, however, remained calm and professional as ever. "Okaaaayyyy…" She raised an eyebrow. "And you are?"

"None of your beeswax!" the pale girl hissed, spittle flying from her lips.

"We're looking for someone…" said the man. "She's… kinda on the tall side."

"And blonde." said the girl.

"Very pretty."

"And she's white. You know, like an American."

"And she's got these big, round…" The man cupped his hands up to his chest. "...squishy things. Like, big ones." he pointed at Electra. "Not like yours. Yours are too small."

"And you're not tall enough either." said the pale girl.

Electra's eye twitched slightly. "You… don't... say..." She gritted her teeth.

"I see…" The redhead nodded gently. "Well I'm afraid I can't help you there. Unless, of course you'd be willing to answer a few questions about all these disappearing Witches..."

The man bent down to whisper into his partner's hear. "Boss, I think she's talking about that thing The Locksmith is doing..."

"Don't you think I know that?" the pale girl replied. "Now act like a good dog and stay quiet! Else I'm sending you back to the mines where I found you!"

"I don't wanna go back to the mines."

"EXACTLY. SO SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY."

The redhead girl pointed at the bickering couple "Friends of yours?"

"Oh-ho, I should hope not." replied Electra. "No friend of mine would be caught dead in such attire..."

The pale girl's neck snapped towards Electra. "SHADDUP, PREP!" she howled. She then pointed at them and said. "Blade! Sic, boy!"

Moving almost too fast to see, Blade's launched himself at Electra with his muscular legs. There was a slight scraping sound from inside his jacket as he drew a katana with a silver blade and a green hilt.

But right just as Electra was bracing for impact there was a flourish of steel, and the redhead was standing between them; spear raised to block the feral strike.

"Oh, a katana. How original." she twirled her weapon, and the her hilt collided with the her opponent's blade, snapping the blade in two. "Let me guess, the ebay auction said it was a 'Genuine Masamune'?"

Blade snarled and wordlessly lunged at the girl, his arms held out like claws, when suddenly a barrier of floating cards appeared between them, separating Blade from his would-be prey.

"...So, it seems your attitude has changed!" said Electra. "Have you realized your place yet, or has my natural charm won you over?"

"Very funny…" the redhead replied. "You're worth a whole Grief Seed if I bring you in alive, and jack squat if you're dead." She strained to keep the barrier up, as Blade began to claw through it. "And I know you're not going to betray me, because if you did you'd be stuck-"

Electra brought her baseball bat onto the girl's head with delight, taking great pleasure in savoring metalling "clang" it made as it rattled the petite juggernaut's skull. The wall of cards collapse immediately, leaving Blade staring listlessly at a pile of cardstock.

"I suppose that's the least an insubordinate cur deserves." Electra slung the baseball bat behind her shoulder. "Now, obviously you people have a way out of this… place. Am I not mistaken?"

Blade nodded.

"Good, then we'll settle this diplomatically!" She kicked the redhead lying at her feet, sending her tumbling towards the pale girl. "Consider this prisoner a gift, I'm sure your sovereign would appreciate another slave digging up… whatever you people mine for." She waved her hand dismissively.

The pale girl looked down at her new captive, and then at Electra. "I see…" she rubbed her chin, no doubt suspicious of Electra's motives. "What did you say your name was?"

Electra made a smug chuckle. "Who am I but Electra Pendragon, heir to the mightiest empire that will ever be, and future savior of the world. For now I am a nobody, but soon I shall no doubt become a household name." She brushed her hair in a dramatic fashion. "But enough about me… by what name do you go by?"

The pale girl glared at Electra for a moment. She then produced a thin piece of wood from the inside of her sleeve, pointed it at Electra and shouted. **"Stupefy!"** A piercing red bolt shot out from her wand, and struck Electra right in the chest.

Electra wasn't worried, however, as she expected that her innate magic resistance would be able to shrug off such a pathetic attack. But then her limbs began to feel heavy, and her eyes began to droop, and before she knew it Electra had begun the slow march into unconsciousness.

She struggled to keep her eyes open, as Blade effortlessly hoisted her into onto his shoulder. "What do we do with this one, Lady Ebony?" he asked.

"We'll bring her to the Queen, and see what she thinks." Electra made out slight footsteps as Lady Ebony approached. "What a prep. She's almost as bad as the princess."

Electra tried to raise her voice in protest by exclaiming that she too was a princess and that her father would have their so-called queen's head when he found out. But at that point she had drifted too far into dreamland to care.

-END OF CHAPTER-

AMBUSH BUG: Heloooooooooo, I'm Ambush Bug! I report the news, so YOU don't have to! And welcome back to Channel 52.

BETHANY SNOW: Our top story tonight, the case of the disappearing children continues to capture America's attention, as the police come up empty.

AMBUSH BUG: Even the media has gotten in on the action! Why, just take a look at a clip from this week's Lawyers and Orderlies: Sensational Victims Unit!

DETECTIVE STAPLER: You'd better tell us how you and your child-killing crime syndicate kidnapped thousands of babies from middle class Americans and strangled them to death!

IVAN MCNASTY: Foolish detective! You vill never pin anythink on me, not as long as zhe FBI is in zhe pocket of my comrades in zhe NAZI PARTY!

DETECTIVE STAPLER: Damn you, McNasty! Damn you and your big, sinister, Russian eyepatch to hellllllll!

CALENDER MAN: In other news, the vigilante known as "The Red Hood" has been sighted heading towards Las Vegas, where it's rumored that he is in pursuit of "Lina Inverse", a wicked sorceress whose penchant for destruction rivals that of Vash the Stampede. Even now, bets are being made on how much of the city will remain intact, with the odds of coming out unharmed hovering around 1 in 300.

AMBUSH BUG: Coming up, a politician from that party you don't like said something stupid today! Find out which one, here on Channel 52!

* * *

**Omake #2: Rebootpoint, in which the Author Makes an Attempt at Satire**

"Oh my god!" said The Flash. "My selfish attempt to change history has broken the timestream! I must now set right what once went wrong!"

"No, wait!" said Super Mysterious Guy #157, "Before you do, I need you to combine the timestreams."

"Um, why?" said The Flash.

"Because doing so will somehow strengthen the cosmos against some kind of looming threat!"

"How?" said The Flash. "I mean, the world looks like it's in pretty decent shape to me. Plus we've fought plenty of those before and came out just fine, relatively speaking. And wouldn't adding more universes just make things more chaotic?"

"DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST DO IT OKAY."

"Geez, fine, fine..."

Just then, Edrobot burst into the author cave. "This just in, everyone!" he said, waving around a stack of papers. "The reboot is official! I have you new assignments!" He then began to hand out pieces of paper to everyone. "Hope: You are now sixteen, and are a member of the Teen Titans."

"Sweet!" said Hope.

"Don't get too excited; you get killed off in your debut issue." Ed handed a paper to Lightning. "Light, you're on the Doom Patrol. Also, your sister is dead, and you are now sensitive and emotionally disturbed because you were abused by your father."

"Just... super." Light glanced through her revised backstory. "Wait, hold on; this says I was raped how many-"

"Shirley, you are now gay."

"But I-"

"Simon, you are now a raging alcoholic who is dating Lady Shiva."

"Uhhhh..."

"Shinji, you don't exist."

"God damn it." and then Shinji vanished in a puff of logic.

Electra began to wave her hand in the air. "Ooh! Ooh! What about me?" said Electra.

"Good news! Not only is your character unchanged, but you've now got a spot in Justice League International..." Ed looked down at his watch "...which was cancelled five minutes ago. Sorry, tough break! But at least you and Shulk get to be killed off- I mean guest star in the next issue of JLA."

Seconds later, Electra smashed Edrobot's brains in with a baseball bat.

"So much for death of the author!" said Simon. ("Oh god I'm such a horrible person...")

"Still, Electra has a point." said Sayaka. "Whether or not the reboot was justified, DC Comics doesn't seem to have a clear direction in mind. The reboot itself alienated longtime fans by erasing vast swaths of continuity, and they don't seem to have any intention of trying to bring in newcomers."

Then Hope pulled out a convenient megaphone. "THE JOKE IS THAT THE REBOOT SUCKS!" she said. " DO YOU GET IT NOW, EVERYONE?! DO YOU GET IT?!"

And then Edrobot swore never to write satire again because he was really bad at it.


End file.
